Gus Pinmeduh and the New Kinda Bulfrawg

Now dontchall ever b'leeve aney ov them shtories bout tha time Gus Pinmeduh came across what that old fool called frawgs with antennees. Now he may tell a convincin tale, but let me tell ya, his tale ish about as straight as a pig's tail, meaning o'course that he don't stick to what tha Good Book tells us 'bout tellin tha truth. I eshpect that that ain't no real fault of his. I suppose it's the creativity tha Good Lord Himself giv'im. So I figure, if the Lord made him a shtorie teller, ain't no real bad thing on Gus's part. Anyways, bak to tha mane thang. Well, Gus iz lyebell to tell ya'all all about it, if ya waz to run in-two him round abouts the town. So I'll tell ya what he told me to prepair ya:
He says he was out ridin round on his tractor out on his farm, out near wear the woods meet his land. Now them woods don't really belong to no one. So shomtimes, when his wife is in a mitey iritible mood, he stopsh his tractor out by them woods, seein as his wife can't quite see that part'a'tha land due to hills and such, and goes esplorin in tha woods. He say's it com's his nerves and shtuff.
Well it would seem one day he was out splorin, as his wife happened to be pregnant with his second child. Now the ol' women in town would say he shoulda been at home helpin her with shtuff 'stead of out playin like a lil' rascal of a boy, but you ain't never met his wife, 'specially when she's with chil'. But I figure it was tha Lord tha made her to be a generally surly woman, so it ain't no real fault of hers. So anyway, he came across a lil' area ov the forest he didn't 'member. Some of tha trees had been chopped down by some sort'a contraption. Mitey curious findin for som'in alredie so curious. He wuz gonna do some more 'vestigatin when he stopped clear in his tracks. Cause there before his eyes wuz four big ol' thangs. They was creetchurs of a disagreeuble like. He said they was green as grass and tall as the tallest sircus mijet. (Ya see, after some travellin sircus came through are parts a few years back, he won't stop comparin anythang he can to a sircus mijet.) Since you may be uneducated in the height of sircus mijets, especially the tallest of em, I'll tell ya that tha creetchurs wuz about 4 foot tall.
He told me they looked like big' ol' walking talkin bulfrawgs, tho whin I askd if they sed anythang, he said no. He sed that they come up to him, holdin there lil' arms out like they's out to get'im. That was win he noticed there eyes, which's red as blood. Those red lil' eyes was starin at him with some meanness the likes of which he hadn't never seen before and ain't ever seen since. So he did what any shmart man woulda done without a weapon when being faced by four disagreeuble creetchurs in the middle of a lonely ol' forest tha don't belong to no one...he ran.
Says he hopped right back onto his tractor faster than he could say, "sircus mijet." And he was outa there. Ever since then he rides past that lil' part ov the forest like he cud smell the sulfur ov Hell. Says he gets his farmin done quicker out that way, trying to get home to his wife. I s'pose a grouchy ol' wife is better than four monsters, but I know many a man who'd disagree. Well, Gus says he ain't never seen em again and that he sure hopes he never does. However, if you ask'im what he thinks they wuz, he'll tell ya flat out that he b'leeves that whoever was cuttin down them trees musta disturbed the undergroun home of a long lost breed ov bulfrawgs. He assumes they done gone back into they're hidden home and are stayin thar like tha had been for a long time 'for the trees got cut down. Now round the town your lyebell to hear two dozen diffrent shtories. Some say they musta ben deemuns out to git Gus for some secret sin. Others claim they wuz mutants cawzed by some sorta freak accident or new fangled invintion. Several will agree with Gus in that they wuz some sort of rare breed ov bulfrawg. Many in the town just say Gus musta been plain drunk outa his mind or crazy one.
But if ya got a lick of sinse, you'll see the obvious truth. Who in they're right mind is gonna b'leeve some crazy shtory like rare bull frogs, or demons, or mutants? No, if you got any sense at all you hafta see that there is only won thing tha coulda been. Don't get me wrong, the Lord made em, so I suppose it ain't no fault of theirs that they was, undowtably, aleeins.