Half personal experience and half the product of watching Johnny English too much |
Chapter 1 ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ "Right, I'm going to be away for a couple of days. If there's any problems, Mrs Greene is next door. Okay?" Harry Drake said, as he packed a bag. "Why can't I just phone you?" Charlie asked, in a bored voice. "I told you!" "No, you didn't!" she said. "I work for MI5, Charlotte! You can't just phone me when I'm on a mission!" "A mission! You make it sound like James Bond!" she scoffed."Ha, more like Johnny English!" "Charlotte, don't be cheeky! This is serious!" her father said in a threatening voice. "I'm not being cheeky!" she retorted. "Yes, you are! Think what your mother would say if she heard you talking to me like that!" he said as he switched off his laptop, and packed it away. "Don't talk about Mum like that. You never cared about her! You only care about yourself! You never wanted her around! And you don't want me around either, do you? Interfering with your top secret job and your top secret life!" "Can we talk about this later?" he said as he wrote a list of things she wasn't supposed to do. "No! You never used to be like this! You might have been moody, but now... you just don't care! You've given up caring! You throw your weight around like you're some kind of big-shot, but really you're just a tiny little piece of the machine, which no one really cares about! And if you crack, they'll just throw you out and replace you with something bigger and better!" "Stop talking about things you don't understand!" "Oh, I understand perfectly! When Mum died, I didn't just lose my mother, I lost my father too! Not that you were a very good one!" "Charlotte-" "My name is Charlie! If you payed any attention to me at all, you would know that!" "On the birth certificate, it says Charlotte!" "Oh, for God's sake! You don't know anything about me!" "I know more than you think!" "What? Because you Googled me? Okay! What's my headmaster's name?" "Mr...no, Dr...Parker?" "No! Dr Parker is our dentist! My headmistress' name is Miss Turner! I didn't expect you to know that, because you have failed to turn up at my last four parents evenings!" "That's not fair! I had a very important assignment!" "Oh, of course! I'm soo sorry for jumping to conclusions! I thought you had simply forgotten! That's your excuse for everything! You are so frustrating! Look, I've got to go to school! Have a nice day at work!" With that, she picked up her bag and stormed out the door, slamming it behind her. Harry stared after her. When Charlie returned from school that afternoon, she found the list of 'Things, Under No Circumstances, To Do'. Or as she liked to call it: The Thirty Commandments. She tore it up and threw it on the floor. She walked upstairs, switched her music up full blast and started her homework. The shouts from the street started about two minutes after she'd turned it on. She smiled to herself and ignored them. At around 6 o'clock Mrs Greene came around to see if she needed anything. Charlie liked her and didn't like to put her to any trouble so she said she'd make herself something for dinner. The old lady asked if she should come in the morning to make breakfast, but Charlie said that she would be fine. They chatted for a while, although it was very one-sided, about school and the fact that the local council were planning to build a huge shopping centre on the park. Then the conversation moved onto her father: How he always went away on businesss trips' and how he must be a very important man to have to go away all the time. Charlie decided she needed to get away. She said she thought she'd heard her phone ring and hurried inside. She looked out the window and saw the old lady was still talking to thin air. She looked in the cupboard and found an ancient Pot-Noodle, boiled the kettle and switched on the TV. The Celebrity News was on and she stared at it disgusted. Apparently, Paris Hilton had lost her chihuahua again, some unknown actress was marrying a rich kid from LA and a band called Splice was splitting up. Charlie couldn't believe that people would actually be interested in where Angelina Jolie bought her shampoo. She thought that most celebrities were only there to distract the tired masses from their meaningless depressing lives and to make everyone feel inadequate. She ate her Pot-Noodle while watching a documentary on hypnotism, then she went up to her room, got out her guitar and started practising the new song that she'd written. At 10:30 she went downstairs and switched everything off, then she went to bed. She lay awake for a long time, thinking about her mother and how much she missed her. She dropped off to sleep thinking about the arguement she'd had with her father, wondering if she'd been to harsh. |