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Rated: E · Fiction · Drama · #1333463
finding faith after tragedy. strength in moving ahead, new beginnings
Chapter 7

“If you’re headed to Tulsa, you will want to head west until you get to highway 75, then head north to Tulsa. I’m headed in a westward direction, I could follow along until your turn off, just to be sure you have no more car troubles.” he offered.

“Thank you Jake, I think that would be great, not to mention a huge peace of mind, knowing you’re there.”

“Will be about 7 when we get there, how bout dinner before we go our separate ways? There’s a café on Hwy 75 I know of, nothing gourmet, but good food nonetheless, what do ya say?”

“How could I possibly turn you down?” she laughed, “I’m indebted to you so much already.” He leaned over, stuck his head through her window and gave her a quick kiss. “Ladies first!” he told her. “I’ll be close behind, so don’t try to lose me.” He winked, turned and then got into his car, watched from his rear-view mirror as she turned on her blinker and entered the highway. He pulled out directly behind her, turning up the volume on his radio, and began singing along. He couldn’t remember the last time he had felt like singing.

Two Sisters, was a decent sized café, located on Highway 75, just north of the Interstate. The signs along the Interstate promised home-cooked meals. Jake had never been there before and thought the casual atmosphere of a café would be a perfect place to stop for dinner. It would also give them time to sit and talk for a few hours, the waitresses wouldn’t mind as long as the tip was good. Jake passed Natalie when they were nearing the US 75 and Interstate 40 split. He turned on his left blinker so she would know to turn then led them both to the restaurant.

At first glance he thought maybe he had made a bad choice. The exterior of the building was constructed of concrete blocks and it appeared the building had been standing there for many years. The long dusty gravel drive also gave him a sense of foreboding. He noticed a few semis in the parking lot and felt a little better. Truckers usually picked out decent eating spots in these out of the way places; he hoped that wasn’t just a myth anyway.

He parked and was out of his car before she had a chance to pull into the parking lot. He walked over to her car, opened the door and held out a hand to her, which she gladly accepted.

There was a long line of booths along the far wall, a huge buffet and salad bar in the center of the room and scattered mix-matched tables and dinette chairs. Jake and Natalie chose an overstuffed red vinyl booth and sat down across from each other. Smiling at each other, feeling comfortable yet awkward, each at a loss of words at the moment, when a tall thin waitress with big gray hair approached their table to take their drink order and to quickly rattle off the special of the day. In a very pronounced southern Oklahoma accent she spewed out, “We got catfish, fried chicken, brown beans, corn, cabbage, biscuits and gravy, fried squash, mashed taters and banana puddin on our buffet or the special of the day is liver an onions, with two sides and a roll.”

“We’d like a few minutes to decide ma’am.” Jake told the waitress, as she turned and waddled off to another table. Jake realized he wasn’t really very hungry. “What would you care to have Nat?” he asked.

“Salad.” She replied shyly.

“Salad!?” he asked in a mock-shocked voice. She smiled and nodded her head. She wasn’t sure she could even get a salad down, her stomach felt nervous, nearly tied in knots. He leaned over trying to look all serious, and trying to imitate the waitress’s accent, he said, “ Ok darlin, ya gonna have French, Ranch, Blue Cheese, Onion, Garlic, Thousand Island or the house dressing?”

They both laughed, and she shrugged, holding her hands up in an “I give up” gesture.

They both noticed the waitress heading back to their booth and tried to gather their composure, looking serious when she arrived. “Got yer minds made up yet kids?”
This elicited a laugh from Natalie as she answered, “Yes ma’am I believe we’re ready.” They both ordered chef salads with Ranch dressing, iced tea and water. Natalie having broken out of her moment of awkwardness was anxious to find out more about her Good Samaritan. “Tell me more about yourself Jake. Please.”
“This could take a couple days Nat, would you settle for the Reader’s Digest condensed version?” he smiled, trying to make light of their conversation. She nodded in agreement. There was so much about himself he did not want to talk about. Not many pleasant things had occurred throughout his life, and he didn’t want to get depressed talking about all the trouble he'd been through either.
“You ever hear of Poteau, Oklahoma?” he asked her. She shook her head no, keeping silent so that he could continue. “Well it’s a small little town, close to the Arkansas border, south of the Interstate a few miles. A real po-dunk kinda town.” He stopped and took a breath. “Bet you didn’t know it is home to Cavanal Hill, ever hear of that?” he asked. Again she shook her head no. She rested her elbows against the table and rested her chin onto her folded hands; watching Jake talk and listening. “Well…it’s a strange but natural curiosity, it is the world’s largest hill, honest, it really is.” He laughed.

“Really?” she asked. “How can that be?”

“It is one foot shy of being called a mountain, it is 1,999 feet.”

“Interesting, I never knew there was a measurement which separated hills from mountains. Thanks for sharing that with me Jake, but, I asked to hear about you.” She reminded him. “Quit stalling” she teased him.

“I was an only child, born to Walter and Ethel Roberts. When I was a kid I used to dream about owning that hill and I had big, big plans, I planned to carry dirt by the buckets-full to the top of that hill until I made it a mountain. Then I was going to proclaim it Jake’s Mountain.” Jake smiled at the childhood memory. “I was raised on a farm, always chores to do, hay to bale, fences to mend, cattle and sheep to tend to, didn’t leave much time to climb that hill.” He winked and pulling his arms around his chest, said, “You know up before dawn, asleep at dusk, every morning walked barefoot ten miles to school.”

Natalie watched his face light up at the memories, the animation and then the distant look in his eyes, as he pictured it all before himself.

“The closest neighbor was a half-mile down the road, there was an older couple lived there, and during the summer their granddaughters would come visit, they were nearly the same age as me. Donna was the older, and she was hmm…carefree and what they called a ‘wild one’ back in that day. We used to sneak down to the Coal Creek and go skinny dipping every chance we could during the hot summer afternoons after the hay was cut to cure.” Jake looked across the table at Nat, blushing. He turned his head, a little embarrassed at remembering his first sexual encounter. He decided to skip over the details even though he felt compelled and comfortable enough to talk about it with this woman sitting across from him. “Even though I thought I was dealt a bad hand, harsh working conditions-cheap child labor and all, I wouldn’t be who I am right now. I often wonder what it would have been like to have grown up in a different environment, different conditions.”

Jake leaned back into the cushion of the booth, placed his hands along the edge of the table, drumming his fingers lightly. “I think we should take turns, your turn to talk about yourself Nat.”

The waitress appeared with their salads, which gained Natalie, a little reprieve. The waitress returned moments later and refilled their coffee cups and asked them if they needed anything else. Both, Jake and Natalie shook their heads and said no thank you.

Jake shuffled and stood, “Excuse me a minute Nat, I’ll be right back.” Jake walked towards the restrooms. Natalie looked around, her eyes settling on her hands and was surprised she was kneading them nervously. She reached down and removed a pen and small notepad from her purse. She leaned over the table, quickly writing and looking over her shoulder. She felt like a schoolgirl as she wrote a short note to Jake. Glancing around again, she quickly placed it in the pocket of his jacket and then returned her pen and notepad to her purse. She leaned back, hands folded in her lap and waited for Jake to return. She tried to think about what she should tell him about herself. She glanced at her watch and was surprised it was nearly nine o’clock. The waitress was clearing dishes from the next booth, Natalie called out in a light voice to the waitress, “Excuse me ma’am, what time do you close?”
The waitress turned and said, “Midnight, sometimes earlier if it’s slow.”
“Thank you,” Natalie replied. Natalie tried to remember the last time she had sat down, talked and listened to someone for this length of time. She nearly jumped when Jake sat down and said, “Dollar for your thoughts, inflation and all.” She could hear and feel the smile through his voice.

“You frightened me; I was lost in thought, as you noticed.” She reached out and patted his hand; he once again became distracted by her touch, the warmth of her hands, the softness of her skin.

“So? You going to tell me?” he said, leaning over the table towards her, giving her his total attention. She grinned and straightened her shoulders, raised one hand, brushed back the hair off of her left shoulder. “Let’s see, a dollar’s worth. I think I can handle that.” She laid her hand back onto the tabletop and Jake reached over, and placed his hand over her slender manicured hand, finding it very comforting just being able to touch her.

“I grew up in a very rural area, near the town of La Vergne, TN. I have two sisters, who are both much smarter and luckier than me. Our parents were killed in an auto accident when I was twelve and our Aunt Wanda raised us. She was this little old spinster type woman who didn’t have a clue about raising teenage girls. I finished high school and went to NSU and earned my degree in Business with a minor in Economics. Reflecting back, I can’t say that it’s done me a bit of good.” She laughed softly and took a deep breath.

“In college I met a boy who was attending law school; we fell in love, got married during my junior year. As soon as he passed the bar exam two years later he decided one of the paralegal clerks where he interned had more in common with him, and he left me.”

“There isn’t anything much I can say about myself that I’d classify as interesting. I have seemed to just exist, caught up in my work and volunteering. I feel like life is passing me by.”

“There you go, dollar’s worth summary of my life.” She braced herself; sure he would follow by asking questions.

“Why Tulsa?” he asked.

Natalie sucked in her breath, exhaled slowly, biting her bottom lip in thought, she picked up her fork, playing with her salad, “I have family there” she answered without going into any detail.

The two of them began eating their salads, pausing every few minutes, making idle conversation. “When are you heading back home Jake?” Natalie asked. “Funny you should ask that. I haven’t figured out where home is yet Nat.”

“To quote a quote, Home is where the heart is.” Natalie said softly, “I think I know exactly what you’re talking bout Jake. That feeling that you don’t belong anywhere.” Natalie stabbed her salad with her fork, getting a large portion on her fork, and realizing it was way to much as she brought the fork to her mouth. Salad Dressing smeared over her mouth and chin as she tried to eat what was on her fork. Jake started to reach out across the table and wipe her face, but she quickly picked up her napkin and dabbed off the dressing.

Two waitresses were beginning to stack chairs upon the tables, getting ready to close for the evening, as another began sweeping the floor in the far corner away from them. Jake looked around; surprised that they were the only customers in the restaurant, he glanced down at his watch and couldn’t believe the time, it was nearly midnight. “You think we should finish up here and let them close up this joint?” Jake asked Natalie. She nodded, as she slid her jacket over her shoulders. Jake stood up and walked over to the booth where the cashier was waiting. He paid for the meals then returned to the table to find Natalie placing five dollars on the table for a tip. He started to protest, but changed his mind.

He reached down and grabbed his jacket and they walked out towards their cars. He laid a hand across her shoulder casually and he felt his stomach tighten. “It’s late are you going to try to drive to Tulsa tonight?” he asked her.

“It’s less than two hours away, I think all that coffee we drank will keep me awake.”
He turned, so that he was facing her, placed his hands against her arms and kissed her softly. He pulled back, hesitantly, “I don’t know what to say to you now, Nat. I feel like something is slipping through my fingers if I let you drive away. But looks like this is where we part.” He looked at her, could tell she was about to say something. Jake placed a finger to her lips, to keep her from saying anything; this was hard enough as it was. “I am on a soul searching mission, Nat, when I find myself, maybe fate will bring us together again. Make this easy for us both, get in that little car of yours, and don’t stop until you get to Tulsa, ok?”

Her eyes watered, tears filling them, she leaned against Jake, wrapping her arms tightly around him, laying her face against his chest, held on to him for a moment, then quickly turned around, got into her car and started the motor.

She wished she could sit there and regain her composure, gather her senses about her. She didn’t want to sit in the car and let him watch her cry. She reminded herself over and over that she was strong, telling herself she should feel silly crying over someone she just met. She turned and waved goodbye to her Good Samaritan friend, and smiled through her tears. He had given her faith in trusting again. She put the car into gear and drove out of the dusty gravel parking lot onto the highway, watching through her rear view mirror until the restaurant and Jake were no longer in sight.

Westbound on Interstate 40, Jake had his window rolled down, the Nova purred along the highway cruising smoothly. The radio was turned up loud enough to hear over the window noise. He was just past Oklahoma City and was still wound too tight to sleep. He pulled over at a rest stop and pulled open his atlas and turned on the headlamp. He looked down at the map on the page that opened which was Arizona. He laid the book down across the passenger seat, pulled back onto the highway, bound for Arizona. He’d pick a town out somewhere along the way. He slouched back into the bucket seat, and smiled, Arizona, he thought to himself, and pressed his foot down on the accelerator.

Nearing the small town of Elk City, Jake was beginning to feel tense again, he shoulders felt knotted and his legs were numb. He took the next exit, and pulled into a Wal-Mart parking lot. He got out and walked around his car, bending and stretching. He thought it felt good to give his legs some circulation, bending and flexing at his knees. He was growing tired but he didn’t want to lose any time sleeping, anxious to find what lay ahead of him.

He leaned back against his trunk, raising his right knee and placed the heel of his boot against the rear bumper. His mind drifted to Natalie and he felt a strange emptiness inside of him, not the devoid of feeling emptiness, the longing to see her again emptiness. He had an urge to turn around to go find her. He looked back up into the starry sky and shook his head, why didn’t I get a phone number to check if she made it safely to Tulsa. He felt a rush of confusion, jumbled emotions course through him all at once. “Dammit,” he muttered under his breath. He closed his eyes and sighed with resignation at his own thoughtlessness, then taking deep breaths, tried to shake this new feeling of loss.

The night air was cool and comfortable, a soft breeze blowing with an occasional gust, the wind lifting the hair on Jake’s head. The sounds of the quiet night, a distant dog bark, a bird chirping off and on, as if calling out to another, seeking company. The sounds of traffic on the Interstate, the whining of the wheels began calling out to him again. He opened up his eyes, looked up at the stars, and wondered what Natalie was doing.

Chapter 8
Jake over-steered the Nova as he caught himself nearly asleep at the wheel. His tires chewed into the gravel, he steered the wheel again, hoping he didn’t lose control of the car. His eyes glanced down at the speedometer he was surprised he was doing 85. He slowed back down, waking up abruptly from the sudden jolt of the car and then pulled over while his racing heart slowed down. “Don’t go killing yourself” he mumbled to himself, then steered back onto the highway.

A few miles down the road he heard a thudding, slapping noise he was all too familiar with. He had passed a road sign a few miles back and knew he was nearing another exit. He pulled onto the shoulder and continued driving, the rear tire flapping noisily as the rubber slapped against the fender.

He drove slowly the next mile to exit 196 and exited off the Interstate. He hoped his spare was aired up; he couldn’t remember the last time he had checked it. He wanted to get off the interstate to change out the tire. He turned left on highway 41, which led into the town of Moriarty, NM. He checked his watch it was nearly noon. He checked his odometer; surprised he had driven nearly 600 miles since leaving Nat back in Henryetta. It felt like a week had passed by already in a single day. He pulled into the gravel parking lot of a closed down, boarded up gas station, a large for-sale sign next to the curb, the back wheel now feeling wobbly in the steering as it started to throw off big chunks of rubber. Jake stopped the car and sat there, not sure what to feel at the moment. Frustration, anger, loss, but not helpless. If he’d had more money he would have gone in search of a tire shop. Jake had plenty of practice changing tires over his years in the oilfield and working on the farm. He’d learned to repair things on his own, not having the conveniences that living in town provided.

The New Mexico afternoon sun was warm, but lacked the humidity he was used to. He opened his trunk, digging everything out that he had thrown in there. He shook his head as he pulled out things he’d not seen in years.

He leaned back against the rear bumper of his car and lit a cigarette, slowly inhaling. With every mile he had driven he had felt the weight on his shoulder lighten. He had a good feeling that things were going to be different, somehow better as he took another chance at achieving something in his life. He glanced upward to the sky; a glimpse of movement caught his eyes. He watched a glider plane drift through the clouds, gliding on air, watched the nose tilt and the aircraft moved in loops. Jake watched with astonishment. He had never seen anything move so gracefully; it was like watching the plane in slow motion, as the plane continued to loop before gliding back into an upright position.

A beat-up old faded red ford pickup pulled into the parking lot, stirring up gravel and dust as it skidded to a halt. “Hey man,” a voice with a light Mexican lilt called out, “I can fix that flat for you man.” The man jumped out of his truck and walked towards Jake, extending his hand, “I’m Pancho.” Jake shook his hand and tried to tell him no thanks, but the man had released his hand and walked to the rear of the car, rubbing his chin, examining the damage. Jake watched Pancho carefully, noticing how his grin became more calculating as he noticed the out of state tags on the Nova.

“You are gonna need a replacement man,” Pancho looked across the vehicle at Jake, “you’re spare is shot too.” I could drive you into town to Humberto’s, he will give you a good price.” Jake hadn’t had a chance to check out the spare yet, he had been too busy daydreaming and watching the plane sailing across the sky. He walked back to inspect the spare, wishing he had taken the time to check it before, but he reminded himself he had not planned this journey and could only blame himself for not being more prepared for problems such as this.

“Think he can fix me up with a set of good used tires cheap?” Jake asked Pancho.
“Si Senor,” Pancho said enthusiastically, nodding his head with vigor.
Pancho set about removing the rim with the flat and carried it to the back of his pickup then returned and grabbed the spare. As he walked towards the driver side of the pickup he began motioning for Jake with his hand to get into the pickup. Jake followed, saying a silent prayer that this didn’t dig too deep into his meager savings in his pocket.

Chapter 9
Natalie arrived in Tulsa in a somber mood. So many different emotions coming out of the blue sparked by the chance meeting with Jake. She began to question if there was really such a thing as chance meetings or if fate played a role in everything. One question or reasoning would launch another question, trying to examine everything and figure out the answers and reasons why. Why would fate bring her and Jake together for one day? How could he have invoked so many different emotions in so little time, was fate just being cruel? Had fate offered them an opportunity and they both chose to go their different ways? One question after another, she felt lugubrious after coming to the conclusion that she was predestined to be lonely and sad. Fate was only teasing her, reminding her of happiness she would never be able to hold on to. She was filled more than ever with self-doubt and feeling lonely.

Natalie lay in bed, tossing and turning, too many thoughts going through her head to relax and sleep. Memories and what ifs of the past flooding her mind. Emotions mixed with thoughts of Jake and the feelings he had awakened and stirred inside her that she had thought were long put away. She looked at the red glow of the digital clock. The minutes were creeping by slowly. The light of the full moon illuminated shadows inside the room. She thought about covering her head with the covers and hiding in her own little cocoon. If only it was that easy to escape her thoughts.

She reached over and turned on the radio on her nightstand, hoping the music would distract her thoughts and allow her to drift off to sleep. Her head began to throb lightly at her temples, she felt like giving up on sleep altogether. She got up to search for some ibuprofen in her purse.

Natalie slipped her robe on and walked through the empty house, her footsteps echoing lightly across the wooden floor as she entered the kitchen and filled up the kettle. She fixed herself a cup of hot tea then walked out onto the front porch. Sitting on the top step, she sipped the warm soothing liquid and leaned back against the brick wall, propping her feet out in front of her. She looked up into the night sky and looked at the full bright moon as it shone down upon her through the sparse branches of the maple tree. She listened to the night sounds, felt a light breeze across her cheek and whispered, “I wish you were here Jake.”
She closed her eyes to stop the tears before they began to fall. “I will not be depressed, I will not be depressed” she repeated to herself. The radio began playing Mary Blige singing, “I’m missing you” and Natalie felt the first tear drop slide down her cheek.

Wiping her face dry with the back of her hand she picked up her cup then stood and walked back into the house. She turned the volume down on the radio as the last verse played and slid the soft robe off her slouching shoulders, throwing it on the empty side of the bed; she crawled under the sheets and pulled the comforter up tight over her shoulders.

Her eyes settled on red digits of the clock again, only twenty minutes had passed. She closed her eyes as her mind switched gears, thinking of the impending appointment now just a few hours away. The past two days had been the first time in several months that her mind had not been focused on the doctor’s prognosis that she had cervical cancer. The appointment set for later that morning would either confirm or disclaim his diagnosis.

The blaring intermittent tone of the alarm clock woke Natalie. She reached out and pressed the snooze button, opening one eye to check the time on the clock. She briefly wondered when she had finally fallen to sleep, struggling to keep her eyes open; she drifted back to sleep. Her mind filled with visions of herself lying on an operating table, her eyes wide open as the doctor’s began to cut into her abdomen, her mouth was taped shut and a tube was pushed down into her throat; they couldn’t hear her scream. Natalie bolted up from her dream, her heart and pulse racing. Sitting up in bed she patted her chest as if to slow her fast beating heart, shook her head and tried to shake the dream from her mind. She swung her feet to the side of the bed now anxious to get up and avoid any continuation of the dream.

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