I think your crazy

         I think you’re crazy. And I remember when I noticed. Your voice changed and your demeanor did too. Life didn’t change, and the challenges that you face are the same, but your mind has lent itself to a complete stage of insanity that is so completely sad, bad, and uncontrollable. I love you, which is to say, ‘I love myself’. When will you be able to react to your changes and flaws?
         It’s been years since your life could be considered healthy. Do you remember what it was like to have all those who surround you respect you? At this point I would be surprised if you remember a time when people could even stand you. The things about you didn’t change only the outlook changed. The point at which one realizes that they really can do whatever they want and survive is a very dangerous point in the development of a person. On the one hand the experience is tantamount to epiphany and that is almost intrinsically a good thing; on the other, it leads you specifically to this state of inward loneliness that hurts your brief relations with other people. This is why you continually tell me, which is to say you tell yourself, that you are so very lonely.
         The way you interact with people is auto pilot, your mind focuses on random things and you daydream while others are talking. The idea that you often think about, which is to say tell me, did not start in your head and this life theory, while true, will not change the state of your mind. You seem content in the fact that most every experience has happened already and even those that haven’t happened to you just haven’t happened yet. This I think simplifies matters to the level of no interaction. When people ask you this or that, when people seek to interact with you, when people are attempting to understand you; all you do is give them the same answers you always have and then keep the conversation to the highest level of familiarity. You are unique and not just a little brilliant yet at this moment you refuse to show it.
         The moment that you began to cover up how smart you are is the moment that you began to destroy yourself. You’ve changed and I want you back, which is to say I wish to find myself.