What being lonely and on drugs will do to you. |
All the lights are off and its late afternoon The fading sun still fighting to shine through to my bedroom But day after day it’s always the same Nothing ever changes until you close your eyes Even then you can’t make time stop flying by And my fingers are trembling and my lungs are struggling And my eyes are blistered and I’m breaking It’s taken some time to realize I’m not alive anymore Not sure if I ever was, but I was able to fake it But now I can only break it, break it, break it And now I know I’m not going anywhere except maybe down the street to get a drink and a smoke we all do what we can to make it, but I just can’t stop breaking Now I’m crying, but I’m not shedding a single tear I’m frustrated and I’m wasted and I don’t feel so bad anymore And you’re here and I’ve seen you before but I don’t know your name And you’re nice and I’m not so leave me alone because my fingers are trembling And I’m just going to break it I’m just going to break again. So now I know I’m not going anywhere Except maybe down to a local club to roll and blow and forget To pretend for one night I’m not who I am and make mistakes I’ll regret in the morning And now I know I’m alone because no one will answer my calls or look in my direction And my lungs are crumbling beneath my clutching fingers and I don’t know what to do I’m smoking my last cigarette and it reeks of marijuana, but maybe that’s just wishful thinking And I’m feeling my core disintegrate and my heart rushing trying to keep me alive I thought I was smarter than this, but that was just an assumption and we all know what assuming does I’m breaking and I can’t stop myself from taking it because this is all I know And it’s nobody’s fault that I’m so destructive and I’m nobody’s responsibility so I’m just going to take it And I’ve lived a life full of regrets so this feeling isn’t new but it’s hurting in a whole different way And the sun has lost the battle again tonight And nothing is shining anymore And nothing changes until you open your eyes But even if you can keep up with the pace of time You would die from exhaustion and dehydration So I’m going to continue lying here with my eyes closed And keep my fingers buried in my chest And break while hoping for the best |