reflection

sometimes i just drive, the window half-open, and loosen my grip.
you can't always brace yourself; it takes a lot of energy.
that's what i think of it all. life, that is.
life is a whole bunch of exhausting energy.
don't get me wrong. i'm not complaining about life.
life is for those who choose to live it; we must all allow ourselves to live.
if we don't, who's to say we won't go to bed in five, ten years and cry ourselves to sleep.
day after day, night after night. grasping the pillow for strength.
strength to forgive ourselves and know we don't get another chance.
no matter the reason we want to look back, no matter the cost.
the cost is much too high. some days i wonder if i'll ever practice what i preach.
or if i just say these things because i see myself in them. some not-so-hidden piece.

i see myself doing these things.