When love is no longer a choice between two people... |
I come through a door that welcomes me no longer. You sit tied to your perspectives and opinions and leave me to wonder what will happen next. Will you simply ignore my presence or will you decide to make small talk by giving me some small dignity in a shallow greeting of acknowledgement? What, I wonder, will you do? You neither glance in my direction nor acknowledge my feeble attempt at a salutation. I am crushed. instead you continue to read the book in which you want to appear engrossed in as I go about settling in. I ask if you are hungry, but you pretend not to hear. I ask a second time and get a staid “No” in reply. Pangs of anger and apprehension mount in me. One emotion enveloped inside the other desperate to burst out if only to create a distraction from this absence of affection demarcating the distance between us. Familiarity has imposed its final contempt upon us and I am left bereft in its chilled abyss ever deepening between us, while simultaneously yearning for an intimacy long departed. I speculate whether you are feeling similar emotions. You do not exhibit that you do. You show nothing and so we go through the motions characteristic of a day in the life of us. Math used to be simple…one plus one equaled two You and I equaled us, together we were made. Was it so very long ago we exchanged breathless kisses, that laughter filled our rooms, and the aroma of our desires flooded the atmosphere? What's it been? Days, weeks, months? Time has become a transient luxury no longer afforded us. When did we last touch and drink in the experience? When did we last dance to the movements of intimacy which our bodies enjoined in as an original collaboration? I cannot, even now, avoid looking at you without wondering these things. Amidst silent tears, arguments and unforgiveness we have lost sight of one another. Do my questions come too late? Now all that remains is a situation exacerbated by our lack of skill to properly address the problem impartially. Sadly I realize how ill-equipped we are from being too close to the challenges of the situation to deal reasonably with the end of our love. |