Losing a living loved one

Time. Time is one of the most precious facets in this life which we cannot control with an iron fist. Everyone at one time or more has had flash backs floating in their mind about the theory of “what if.” It wouldn’t take most of us more than ten seconds to go back to a point where we would exercise our “do-over” option. Well unfortunately, as we all know, there’s no magic fairy with a wand ready to grant us any such wish. Losing a love one to death can be a life-altering experience as we all know. Pain and mourning are commonplace when we lose the physical of our loved one. However losing someone in your life who has not passed on but is no longer there because of other reasons is just as difficult. I’m facing the unfortunate instance in my life. I lost the relationship with my niece for three years now and still counting. A simple argument turned into silence for a week, month, and finally years. Although I issued an apology for my part in the mishaps me haven’t been able to mend our once close relationship. I wish I could turn back the hands of time to the day of our mishap and handled the situation differently. Hindsight is a wonderful component, the problem with hindsight is it’s happens too little too late. Looking back I think my stubborn pride made the situation escalate more than necessary. Although ultimately I did issue an apology for my part in the situation we still have not been able to mend our once close relationship. I miss the easy going relationship that I once had with my niece. I remember how we use to watch comedy movies together, hit the park for a walk, or just talk about life in general. There were so many times I wanted to go over to my sister’s house and pick up my niece for the weekend so we could go to the mall, a movie, or just spend time together. Our silence toward one another became so normal, that when we did speak occasionally it was as if we were strangers. I think the pain of having someone you love alive but not being able to live and share life with them may be worst than a deceased loved one. I don’t think I’ll ever totally give up the possibility of one day once again having a solid, loving, and caring aunt-niece relationship again but until that day I can only grieve for my living loved one.