Light vs. Sound

Sound had been in Light’s shadow since the birth of Time. When the two first met, Sound was all talk, bragging to Light how he was going to change the world in a way Light had never seen. Light was not in the least bit concerned; he knew his role was far more significant, and that while he was changing seasons, Sound would be in the background, making birds squawk. Their relationship was constantly tested by Light’s obsession with being first. Order was unimportant, but Light loved to watch what his position would do to Sound. His ego and Sound’s inability to let things go turned everything they did into a competition.
On one such day, Sound was entertaining Light with a list of daily grievances. “You get literature and poetry and illusions and art, and what do I get? …Onomatopoeia?”
“What about music and song?” Light illuminated.
“I would have never gotten any of those things if you hadn’t inspired them.”
“Yeah, you’re right.”
“I want more,” Sound whined.
“Well maybe if you weren’t always late, you’d get more.”
“That’s not fair.”
“It isn’t? You’re always second, Sound. I come in with the lightning, and theeeeeen you show up. I’m in the sky with the plane, and there you are, lagging behind the tail—always lagging behind. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you liked it back there?”
“What?! No way! I hate it, and that’s why I’m determined to start every new day farther ahead than the last.”
“Determined, huh? Well if you are so determined, then why is it your roosters only crow after I’ve lit up the sky?” Sound paused. “Determination is all talk, and until you see that, you’ll remain behind those that walk the walk.”
“Like you?”
“I can’t help it that I’d rather do something then sit around and talk about it. I know what I want, and I go after it. I’ve earned my place up front.”
“I know what I want too.”
“That remains to be seen.”
“All right then, Mr. Shiny Pants!” Sound blared. “I challenge your place.”
“What do you mean?”
“I propose a race around the world.”
“A race?” Light glared. “You really think you can beat the speed of Light?”
“I’m up for a sprint, if you’re not afraid.”
Light twinkled. “Okay, and what do I get if I win?”
“If you win, you can add another star to your collection. But if I win, you have to show me some respect and give me a chance to catch up every once in awhile.”
“That seems fair.”
“You ready?”
“Always.”
“On your mark…. Get set….”
“I’m back,” Light beamed.
“Oh, come on now! What the hell! I didn’t even—”
“I’m back again.”
“Fine, you’re fast!” Sound said annoyed. “You can stop now.”
“So what’s next?”
“You know, just because you’re always first, doesn’t mean you’re the most important.” Light began glimmering. “Hey, I’m being serious! I’m just as important to the people as you. I’m probably even more important than you.”
“I see another challenge approaching.”
Sound took some time to formulate a fair test. “Okay, I’ve got it. We each pick two people. You pick someone who is only able to see, and I’ll select someone who can only hear. We’ll watch the two for—let’s say…a decade—and at the end of that decade, we will see who has had the better life—someone living in your light, or someone in the company of my sound.
“You’re on,” Light shined. “This should be a breeze.”
“We’ll see,” Sound whispered.
“What are the ground rules?”
“Only one, that we each must stay in the boundaries of everyday life. No embellishing or grandstanding. It must be normal.”
“Okay, but we’ll need someone to pick a winner at the end of the decade.”
“How about Time?”
“She’s always too busy. What about Color?”
“Right, like I’m gonna let you have one of your best friends judge this competition. No, I think we need someone who doesn’t swing either way.”
“All right, then how ’bout Electromagnetic Radiation?”
“You mean Waves?”
“Yeah. We both work with him an equal amount of time. He should be able to give us the impartial ruling we’re looking for.”
“That works for me.”
Once the competition had a judge, the two contestants selected their pawns: one blind man and one deaf man, both with similar ages and backgrounds and within the same city. After checking with Time to make sure the two men had ten years to spare, the contest got underway. Things started innocently enough—a sunnier day, here; a louder voice, there—but the ground rule was soon unearthed as the battle of senses intensified.
Light surrounded his deaf subject in the crispest autumns, the coziest winters, the cheeriest springs, and the safest UV summers. He cranked out rainbows every morning, shade every afternoon, and abstract paintings every sunset. Sound wrapped his blind subject in words of love and encouragement and muted all things inappropriate. He cranked up nature’s orchestral ambiance and let it rock him to sleep and politely prompt him awake. Each one used every trick at his disposal, but they were merely performers to a two person crowd.
For the deaf man, the chores of daily life could never end soon enough and allow him to return to his favorite closed-captioned programming. He would spend hours working alongside Gil Grissom and Catherine Willows, trying to solve what game Jeff Probst had in store before Kramer bounded through the syndicated door. The characters and settings were so much more exciting than the mundane world outside his doorstep. He imagined what the characters sounded like and gave them his own voices based on proportions and personality. Light did all it could to direct the deaf man towards love, financial opportunity, and adventure, but the man brushed past them all to get back to his high-definition words. While the deaf continued channel surfing, the blind was preoccupied by the man in the box.
The blind man would spend every chance he had camped out by his radio listening to Garrison Keillor report on Lake Wobegon or Cab Calloway vocalize an era. The skits and sound effects were so much more exciting than the mundane world outside his doorbell. He imagined what the voices looked like and gave them faces based on pitch and amplitude. Sound did all it could to redirect the blind man from his enclosed love and hollow voices, but nothing would sway the man’s cane from leading him back to his Dolby Digital words.
***
Halfway through the third year, Sound could not hold back his frustrations any longer and was relieved to hear Light was experiencing similar problems. “I don’t understand it,” said Sound. “I’ve done everything for that ungrateful bum down there, and not once has he taken notice.”
“Are you sure we didn’t switch guys accidentally, because there’s no reason why a person able to see would ignore my 3D masterpieces for something in two conventional dimensions.”
“I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong.”
They then noticed the laughter coming from their unbiased judge. “What’s so funny?” Light burned.
“You two!” Waves peaked. “You’re always trying so hard—matching the sky’s color to your guy’s favorite t-shirt.” He turned to Sound. “Making sure every word is enunciated and projected so that your guy is never confused. My personal favorite still is the bird you had chirp ‘La Bohéme’ outside his bedroom window.” Waves finally stabilized. “You two are always working so hard to impress people, and I just find it amusing that I never have to.” Waves cascaded away, leaving Light dimmed and Sound silent.
“Thanks a lot, Waves!” Light glared. “That’s the last time we ask for your help again!” He turned to Sound. “Can you believe that guy?”
“It’s not his fault.”
“I know, but still, he could have at least mentioned that our subjects were avid fans.”
“If anyone’s to blame, it’s the blind guy and deaf guy.”
“They obviously don’t appreciate either one of us.”
“It’s not the first time it’s happened,” Sound groaned. “We never get any credit. Do you know that I made all the streams in the world talk for an entire day—talk, not babble, actually communicate coherently—and not one single human being noticed! Not one!” Sound softened. “For once I’d like them to see what life is like without us around; then maybe they’d start appreciating our services.”
A bulb appeared over Light. “That’s not a bad idea.”
“What is?”
“What if we cut them off?”
“Cut who off?”
“Our subjects.”
“You mean if I stopped giving the blind guy sound and you stop giving yours light?”
“That’s right; then we’ll truly know which one of us is more essential to survival, and the one who is more essential, must be the more important.”
“I guess it would teach them a lesson for ignoring us. So how do we do this?”
“The rules of this round are simple: we do nothing. We see which person lasts longer without our assistance, and the first one to die, wins.”
“I bet mine won’t last ten minutes.”
“We’ll soon find out.”
“This is gonna be interesting.” Light and Sound severed their ties with the two men and then sat back and waited for the inevitable.
The deaf man was behind the wheel of his Honda Accord when the sight of his windshield went blank. He panicked and pulled his foot from the gas. The white vehicle drifted across double yellow lines and clipped the mirror off a passing car. The jolt forced his foot back to the pedals, where it mistook the gas for the break and accelerated the rest of him back into his lane. Screams and horns blared over the car, as it veered back and forth through another intersection. The man finally caught up with his body’s speed and threw both feet on the next closest pedal. The tires locked. His seatbelt snapped him back into his seat, just in time for him to clinch every arthritic joint and shut his eyes for the oncoming end.
When the tire smoke lifted, the Honda was a foot away from striking the side of a collapsible cane. Above the cane’s reflective tape and aluminum shaft was the trembling hand of someone who had fallen into the street. The deaf man turned off his engine and stumbled out of his door with his arms flailing in front of him. He searched for something to hold onto and quickly found it at the base of his legs. He bent down and tapped his fingers over the clothed object. “Please help me!” cried the object. “I can’t stand up!” The deaf man felt the figure trying to stand and assisted him onto his feet. He then ran his hands over the person’s face and stopped on a pair of sunglasses. “Thank you so much,” said the blind man. “I don’t know what happened. One minute I’m fine, and the next minute, everything’s quiet and I’m falling sideways into the street. Lucky for me there weren’t any cars around, huh.” He then noticed the hands on his face were trembling. “Are you all right? Is something wrong?” He placed his hands over the deaf man’s face and felt the moisture running down his cheeks. “Hey, don’t cry; I’ll be okay, just as long as we get outta this street.” He started to move. “You’ll have to give me a hand, buddy. My balance is all shot to hell.” The deaf man helped the blind man walk, and the blind man helped them both onto the sidewalk.
“Would you look at that,” Light shined. “They’re helping each other. They have no way of knowing who the other person is, and they’re still helping each other.”
Sound turned the spotlight on himself. “Listen, I’m sorry I’m always giving you grief. In all honesty, my work could never compare to the amount of stuff you do every day and night. You do deserve to be up front.”
“Thanks; I know that wasn’t easy for you to say. And, I probably could be a little more companionate and let you catch up every once and awhile, just as long as you don’t let it go to your head.”
Sound smiled. “I won’t.”
“We should give those guys back their senses.”
“I think we can do one better,” he said and leaned over to Light.
Back on the city sidewalk, the two men were still recovering from their senseless accidents. Without warning, the blind man threw his arms over his face, and when they dropped, they took with them his sunglasses. The film over his eyes faded away, and the vision of life came into frame. “I can see! I can see! There you are!” he cried to the deaf man.
“Did you just say, ‘I can see! I can see! There you are!’” The other man nodded. “I can hear! I can hear!” The two men embraced and saw and heard joy for the very first time.
“That was a nice idea,” Light shined.
“It was the least we could do.”
“Come on, let’s go to the movies.”
“I love the movies!” Sound shouted enthusiastically. “There’s always so much to do!”
“I know, car chases, gunfire, explosions—
“And don’t forget the storms. What other place can lightning and thunder occur simultaneously.”
“None other, my friend.” The two laughed and went side-by-side to the front row.