midnight abyss

I dangled in the noose like a fish being held above water. The blood dripped onto the kitchen counter. A red pool was starting to take form. My head was burning. The cries of a baby suddenly stopped when a thunderous bang echoed through the house. Shadows surrounded the room and fear took hold of me. The was the end. I had no life flashing before my eyes, no last words, and no struggle. I was too weak to struggle; too weak to live. Blackness.



I awoke. Not from a dream but from life. I slowly opened my eyes to stare at the vastness that surrounded me. The emptiness that consumed me. It was as though I were engulfed in a gigantic meteor crater. Miles seemed to force me to the center of it while pushing the distant outlines of mountains further away. Mini crevasses covered the ground and no bottoms were in sight. The sky casted a shadow upon all the land around me. Everything was dark. Behind the forbidden clouds lied not a sun but a sea of flames. An atmosphere entirely composed of fire. I had been lying on a rock hard ground covered in the grey darkness of the clouds. I had no idea how long. Maybe weeks. Maybe only a few minutes. Here, time didn’t exist.
A familiar song began to intensify throughout the distant mountains. It became so loud that I couldn’t help but run from it. Moonlight Sonata by Beethoven kept on echoing throughout my head and I punched my own ears to make it stop. Echoing, increasing, speeding up, the melodies that proved for hundreds of years to be considered beautiful were now robbing me of my sanity. The harmonious tones of excellence had turned into hated noises that I couldn’t escape no matter how fast I ran.
I began to concentrate on somehow pushing the music out. Although I had grown to love it in the previous life, now, I was doing anything to gain freedom from it. Silence.
Continuing, faster, more determined, I ran to the mountains until the faint silhouettes became clearer and texture starting to take form. The ground started to rise as I felt the base of the mountain climb underneath my feet. I continued around the mountains for days, maybe even weeks, or months. Hunger took hold up me yet I wouldn’t die. The desire for sleep consumed me yet I couldn’t sleep. Battling through the extreme heat and cold proved more strain that I had ever experience before. The flames appeared angry as they roared above in the sky.
Much time was spent exploring the mountains, looking for someplace that appeared to offer the least bit of compassion. I had encountered no one on my journey. Shadows managed to play tricks and flash before me. Outlines of familiar people and people long gone. Mirages of memories occurred on occasion as well. These memories were long gone too. Vague images of the past played out as a silent movie that had been blurred but only enough for an image to be identified.

It was my daughter’s 1st. birthday. Little boys and girls of friends of ours ran around the house playing tag and eating cake. A smile emerged upon her face and she looked up at me. I was hoping to hear something after missing that moment for far too long now. Inaudible words came out of her mouth as I struggled to hear her. I didn’t need volume to understand the next phrase. Her lips adjusted to produce the right sound. It didn’t matter, I wouldn’t hear anyway. I-LOVE-YOU she said. I love you. I love you. I love you. Knowing she couldn’t hear me back, I whispered a faint ‘I love you too’ back to her and she just sat there and smiled back at me.

The mirage disappeared. Moonlight Sonata played.

Finally over the mountains, I sat down and looked at the rocky vastness that surrounded me. Everything was a dull shade of grey. No color existed except for the reds and oranges of the flames above and the reds of my bloodied, scarred feet.
A castle was situated in a flat plain that was surrounded by towering mountains such as the one I had found myself in. The castle was black and had a large upside down pentagram engraved into a whole side of it. No moving people were in sight. The castle was in the darkest part of the plain. Black clouds were centered directly above it buried it underneath its shadow.
Hours, days, or even weeks went by as I slowly made my way down the treacherous mountainside and inched closer to this castle. Approaching the castle gates I began to wonder if entering would be the best choice. It didn’t matter; there was nothing to look forward to here. Here nothing mattered. It was just an empty place to remain idle for the rest of time.
To my surprise, the gates were unlocked. In fact, no lock was even present. Rod-iron like steel formed the monstrous cage-like door. I entered the castle and no noise was present. No noise except for the faint melodies of Moonlight Sonata. The tone was quiet now; just enough so I could still hear it but not loud enough to dominate other surrounding noises. I walked down an empty corridor where thousands of life-like statues were lined up against the wall facing each other in a constant stare. The details of the statues would amaze some of the world’s best sculptors.
I passed through a wooden door that had a spiral staircase shooting straight up through the castle. The staircase must’ve been consisted of millions of steps and I made up my mind to climb every single one of them. No top was visible from the base of the spiral so I started to walk up the stairs. There was no railing that guarded a person from falling to an inevitable death if they were to fall from the side.
The bottom grew distant as I made my way up the stairs. Walking, breathing, panting, I grew tired and sat down. Moonlight Sonata blared and as hard as I tried to push it out, it would just keep on playing at an incredible decibel. I got up and started running up the stairs. The song slowly faded away as I ran faster and faster up the steps. I could see an end to the stairs now, a platform that overlooked the vertical tunnel of spirals held a door that had been the blackest of blacks I had ever seen. I stood there and thought about opening the door. I put my hand on the knob and twisted. The music stopped.



“I’ve been expecting you” said the man dressed in all black.
“Who are you? Why am I here” I questioned.
“You know who I am and you know why you’re here” said this wretched man.
I thought about what he said.
“Aren’t you supposed to be red and have horns?” I had asked
“No, society has forced that appearance unto me to make me seem much worse than I really am. They do that so all the little kids go around screaming when someone utters the name ‘Lucifer’. I don’t intend to harm. Someone has to rule over this place.” Lucifer said.
“Take me home! Let me go back! Where’s my daughter?” I screamed at him.
“Don’t scream. I don’t like screaming and I’m afraid I can’t do that.
He turned around and stared out through a floor-to-ceiling window that overlooked the emptiness that surrounded the castle. A dagger was settled on a desk next to me and I took it in my hands and had it grasped tightly in my hands. I quietly moved closer to Lucifer and raised the dagger over my head in both hands.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” he said.
Anger built up and I didn’t bother registering his words in that calm yet serious tone of his. I smashed my hands into his back and pushed harder into the spine of the beast
“I told you not to do that!” the beast roared.
He turned around with the dagger still in his back and raised his fist and smashed it into me. The force sent me flying into a wall that was also filled with statues of people. I crashed into a sculpture and the head cracked off and rolled along the floor. My back was against the legs of the decapitated stone person and blood started trickling down the torso. Not of mine but of the statue’s. Blood was also draining out from the head that had rolled along the floor and stopped to the left of my feet.
“Let me go home. Let me go home.” I pleaded. My demands turned to cries of desperation.
“Listen, here’s how it will work. You and I will have a battle. The first to bleed loses. If you win, I’ll let you go back. Not as yourself, as a baby emerging from the womb. If I win, you will fall into an eternal hole for all of time. You will continue falling until I loose reign of the throne.”
Before I could respond, I appeared in an immense arena. The stands were filled with the statues that had swarmed the walls of the castle. Lucifer was standing across from me. A sly grin appeared across his face and he turned around and faced me. His eyes pierced through all the noise and his human-like body started to approach me.
Inside, fear overpowered me and all I could do was to close my eyes. I wished myself to just disappear and never see this place again. Moonlight Sonata began to play and intensified when a powerful fist crushed my face.
After being unconscious for some time, my eyes opened up and red blood streamed into my eyes.
“So you have lost.” Those were all the words he managed to say before I found myself standing on the edge of a hole that seemed to go on forever. My heels were over the edge and I tried to keep my balance so I wouldn’t fall. Panic consumed me as I closed my eyes and felt tears roll down my cheeks. I once again tried to close my eyes and wish for my escape. No success.
The roar of Lucifer echoed like a blaring of a thousand horns and it forced me to stumble over the breaking point. I fell down the tunnel and kept on falling. After a long time, the panic went away and depression sank in.
I was depressed because I knew my life would never amount to anything that was worthwhile. Declining down this morbid hole, I realized that my life had proved to be meaningless. So I fell. I fell and fell and fell. I was never quite sure how long it was because time never existed. I may have been falling for mere seconds or years. It didn’t matter. Sometime, somewhere all declines must come to an end. All things evil in life must be stopped.
Gaining speed. Going deeper and deeper. The walls climbed as I sank further and further into this eternal hole. The silence disappeared when Moonlight Sonata slowly rose within my brain. I didn’t care now. The song continued to play and I continued to fall. The harmonies of the piano replayed itself and no matter what I did I couldn’t escape from it. Even if I tried, I knew that the song would never go away and I would never stop falling.