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Rated: ASR · Short Story · Drama · #1228124
Sometimes love is more a choice than a feeling
Rocky Road


The memory was still clear in Lilly's mind.

“Tinkle” went the little bell merrily.

“Crack” was the screen door's sharp reply.

George Hammond, looked up as Lilly, a 10 year old regular in his ice cream shop, stomped across the black and white checkered tile floor, braids dancing wildly, clutching a crinkled dollar bill in one of her clenched fists. With the agility of a free climber, she pulled herself up the stool, gripping the counter with both hands. Her cloudy demeanor was evident from her gait.

George inspected her more closely, as she sat on the stool in front of him. He noticed among the smudges of dirt, lunch, and bygone crafts, some rather recent wet splotches on her well worn blue and white gingham dress. From these he traced the tear trails up the front of her cherub round face, to two red and swollen eyes, which searched him with an intensity far past their short years. With a hmmpf, she slapped the crinkled dollar on the counter and sat silently staring at George.

“That bad”, George finally offered in a tentative voice?

“Gem's dead.”

She spoke in a monotone, as though releasing a single drop of emotion would uncork yet another flood of tears. George suppressed a subtle smile. It seemed to him to be a parody of a cheap film, the small, distraught 10 year old bellied up to the ice cream counter, and he the “bar tender” indulging her misery, while offering a sympathetic ear. George forced the smile into a frown, and Lilly bravely launched into her story.

“Daddy left the gate open, and Gem just wandered out into the street.” She swallowed hard and attempted to continue.

“The car just...”

She couldn't do it.

“You want the usual again” George offered as a diversion. Lilly nodded her golden head, as new tears spilled down her face and splashed onto the counter. George opened the case and began to scrape the rich brown rocky road  into a cup.
“Well, old Gem sure was a lucky dog to have had an owner like you all these years.”
Lilly cried silently on, but George noticed, she was beginning to eye the sweet chocolate and marshmallow salve that would soon be applied to her wounded heart.

“I remember when you got that dog”, George said, making conversation as he handed the frozen chocolaty medicine to Lilly, who was busily wiping her eyes with the back of a slightly soiled hand, and sniffling.

“I think you were three, and he was big enough almost for you to ride him.”
Lilly was given over to the sweetness of the ice cream, and George's stories of happier days, ebbing her flow of tears.

“Do you remember the time you got lost, and Gem brought you in here? I think you were about 5 then.”

“I do, but I'm still not sure if Gem was really trying to save me or if he just wanted some ice cream”, Lilly's voice had become contemplative, and George could see that the her pain was easing a little.

“He was the best dog. They always say a dog is man's best friend, and that makes me kind-a mad! I know Gem liked me better than some dumb old boy! At least I think... don't you think so Mr. Hammond?”

Lilly looked quizzically at George, with her head cocked slightly to one side, just enough for the end of her braid to delicately dab at the pool of chocolate in the cup in front of her. George leaned back against the rear counter, and looked at Lilly for a while. Sticky chocolate colored her soft round cheeks, and ran delicately, but unnoticed, down the spoon, held vertically, slowly over her fingers, and down her wrist. Lilly painfully reminded him of the daughter he had dreamed about, but would never have. He'd chosen to live here in this town, and run this shop, and that was more than Dianne could accept. His young wife had left him long ago before he could start a family. He'd made his choice, and she hers.

“Lilly, “ George finally said, “ Gem chose you. Even before you could love him. He was your dog because he wanted to be your dog, not some dumb boy's dog. He knew your voice, and always wanted to feel your arms around his neck. Maybe it was the rocky road he could always taste on your face.”

Lilly smiled a broad, sticky smile.

“So it's kind-a like rocky road, huh Mr. Hammond. I always want rocky road 'cause it always tastes the best, and I don't have to worry if I'm gonna like it.”

“Yeah Lilly, I guess love is something like that.”

Lilly, now 39, lingered a little in the memory of Hammond's Ice Cream parlor. It would always occupy a special place in her memories of growing up in rural Illinois.

“Lilly... Lilly are you listening?”

Alan's voice brought her out of her memory.

“Look, I'll leave O.K. I'm sorry to have put you through all of this. I don't know what I was thinking. I love you, and I understand if you can't forgive me. I'll... I'll just go, O.K.”

Lilly just sat in bed, staring at Alan. Her head ached from crying, and she felt hot and weak.

“I don't feel any love for you Alan, “ she said at last.

Alan just looked at the ceiling.

“I'm angry, and I'm hurt, and I know I've got gallons more tears to cry. I don't feel any love for you, but I'm choosing to love you, O.K? It's too complicated for me to explain right now, so just get your pajamas on and get into bed so we can try to get some sleep.”

Alan looked stunned. He couldn't reconcile her reaction now, with the fight they'd had earlier that evening. After a moment, he decided to just give up. He changed into his pajamas, and climbed into bed.

Lilly laid her golden brown head on his shoulder, and coolly draped her arm across his chest. Alan rested his hand on her shoulder, and he could feel her silent, bitter tears on his chest.

“Honey, is there anything... anything I can do?”

After a moment, Lilly said, “Yeah, pick up some Rocky Road tomorrow?”










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