These are just a few of the many thoughts that swirl around. |
Dark Days As I stare into the mirror with this strong feeling of time not knowing if it was his fault or if it was mine to prey on such innocents that has left me in a fog I feel that in my small world I should be chained up like a dog not deserving the chance of life but more like the edge of a knife now knowing the things that I've done for in the devils eyes well, it was all fun now as I hide here in my shell God, I should go to hell for these acts I have portrayed my death bed is where I should be laid but the devil I don't want to win for making me commit this sin of shattering the thought of love and blocking the light from above so I ask you for your forgiveness for working the devils business I kneel before you my lord and ask you for your light to cast up your mighty sword and help me finish this fight to climb out of this hole and reclaim the heart of my soul for with your hands of grace the devil will definitly lose this race. Flight..... Then and Now..... That was then, this is now tell me again if this is to be how why one will destroy the beauty of life so easy for them with the use of a knife so slender a cut, so big of a gash to snuff out the light, for so little as cash to use one's hand to tighten the wire or to strike a match to start up a fire with a spray of bullets the lead will fly for no particular reason someone will die If you are so lucky not to be the one live to be happy, leave nothing undone to rise above all can bitter and sweet to touch the face of God would make you feel complete. Flight..... The Past..... As I sit here thinking of the past wondering how it went so fast looking through the window at the trees so still why would I do so many things against my own will they say that together we stand and divided we fall but isn't it enough that we just try to stand tall even though I am the one who likes to take a chance why do I find it so hard to be the one to take a stance as I sit here watching the snow fall wondering if this is really me at all how the snowflake falls so free not knowing how short it's life will be no worry and even no care about life's being so unfair where its going or where it's been and all the things left unseen unsure of where it's supposed to land never asking for a helping hand I believe it lives for the day and all it really wants to say is thank you for allowing me to see all that is given to me for we all should be thankful to give and most of all, for all a chance to live. Flight..... Learning To Smile..... All this time thinking that my life was still sinking I was not able to see any future for me facing the devils and clowns and all their ups and downs they left me feeling dismay each and every day Then an angel came from above to tell me about someones love walking with me for a while teaching me how to smile then with such a subtle kiss taking care not to miss she showed me what to perceive it is his touch I shall receive for this feeling I get from above is the feeling of God's undying love Flight...... FLIGHT..... Good morning sunshine, good morning light. you give me the strength, to put up the fight. against the evils of sin, for the devil wants to win. to spread my own wings, with the sun in sight. look towards the future, as I take (become) FLIGHT. feeling the warmth of our lord, as I continue to soar, rising above all, being sure not to fall. soaring in to the blue, excepting all that is new. for believing in myself, and those around me too. to prepare for life, and to prepare for love. is to look into god's eyes, as I soar like a dove. Flight..... What a view......... it was made for me. as it was made for you to have the sweet grace of this spectacular view. of all the sugar and spices and little solar devices nothing has more power than the scent of a flower. So use all your senses to break down the fences when push comes to shove we must all learn how to love. to believe in oneself is a part of the game, to belittle oneself is the feeling of shame. if life is feeling a little grim and the lights a little dim just raise your head high and gaze into the sky and learn how to care, for this world we share. and think not the edge of the knife but think only "The Beauty of Life" Flight..... With his music.......... with his music I will learn to play because his music is here to stay with his music I will learn to live because his music is here to give with his music I will learn to fly because his music will never die with his music I will learn to dream while floating on a quite summer stream with his music full of light I will be able to put up the fight with his music I will never quit because his music doesn't let you sit with his music I cant stay on the ground because of his music and it's euphoric sound with his music I get lost in thought for that ecstasy I've always sought with his music nothings left undone because of his music I always have fun with his music you never nod when ever you hear the music of God with his music I'll learn to love because of his music I will soar like a dove. Flight..... In It Together..... Watching people in the streets hurry along some of them weak, some of them strong things to do, places to go so many of them really don't know got to go here, got to go there some of them pulling out their hair look at em drive slow, look at em drive fast better slow down bud, you'll end up in a cast a few of them rich, a few of them poor all looking to get to the top floor look-he's sporting a new pair of shoes you know they come in twos I know that last line was dumb but I'm starting to feel a little numb she's seems to be wearing leather he's got a top hat and feather over there stands some teens with some fashionable rips in their jeans there goes someone on a bike and that one looks ready for a hike with every one in such a hurry its all starting to look a little blurry look- she feels it necessary to carry mase for, well you know, just in case this one holds her purse a little tighter just because he looks like a fighter. do any of them really seem to care that we all breath the same air. sitting on the corner watching the world go by trying to figure out exactly why how people can be so mean when we all share the same scene. everybody is black, everybody is white so why do so many of us have to fight for us not to get along to me feels, so very wrong so if you have to walk a mile just remember to offer a smile and don't get scared when I call you brother cause in the long run, we're all in it together. Flight..... First Time..... When I looked into your eyes for the first time my unsettled heart started to chime with nothing to loose and everything to gain I knew nothing would ever be the same I've been waiting for you my whole life for someone like you to make my wife we will soon become each others lover as we learn to teach one another to always live to see the next day to express our feelings in a magical way to fill the void within our heart to leave the past, right from the start now I know now from that day afar when I wished upon that little star to bring me an angel from above that would finally show me how to love the only angel that God knew would turn out to be my one and only YOU! Flight..... As The Wind Blows..... As I sit here and listen to the wind blow Hoping that this poem will soon flow That I am able to string a few soft words just like the sound of chirping spring birds Hoping when I get there I can truly hold back Instead of something else, like a little sneak attack Because I am overwhelmed with this feeling inside with this fear that you will run and hide So for you I will be like a perfect man and only ask to hold your sweet hand cause I know deep within my heart That this is only to be the start of what they call a long term relation with no time for silly frustration So as I try to come to the end of this poem to leave you in a state of just knowing That you have nothing to worry about with me But only to let out a shout , you'll see That I could actually be the one to make you shiver and the rest of your body definitely quiver To finally realize within your heart that it is to be the one you call Mark. Flight..... Blown Away..... Blown away like clouds in the wind Not really knowing if we really haved sinned Not wanting to stop this emotion I feel This feeling that makes me feel so real At this time of really not knowing but some how, just can't stop this glowing Standing here on your center stage Soaring like a bird, just let out of it's cage I can release all of my worries As I step out of the flurries Into this world surrounded by your love that fits me, oohh, so much like a glove I thought I would write this little letter to tell you how much I feel like a feather With this force you have over me It really isn't hard to see Just how long I will definitely stay Because nothing in this world, BUT YOU will ever take me away! Flight..... One last time. She's been gone for so many days my life feels like I'm in a walking in a haze she made the choice to leave it all behind left with only a memory in my mind the decision made NOT only by her self to put me away up on the shelf She say's, maybe it's not meant to be easier for her, I think, to get up and flee jumping on a plane to fly far away leaving my life with not much to say I will keep our days together deep within my heart to see her once again as I fall asleep in the dark I know it's really not all that much to be able to only dream her touch doesn't really matter if she's here or not at this time of dispare, it's all I really got I hope she knows I will no longer need to wallow even though this is really hard to swallow so as I put this pen to paper one last time I'll let the tear from my eye dot the last line........ Flight..... Change...... Sitting here in a state of confusion Trying to come to terms with the conclusion Wondering why it all came to this And all the things I am going to miss The feel of your curly brown hair And how I melted under your sexy stare To touch you’re soft, silky white skin And how it stirred the butterflies within To hold you close to me at night And how you looked in the morning light I am left with only memories in my head Having to exchange the love for pain instead Hoping to overcome this feeling within my heart And be able to have a brand new start I guess everyone faces the decision Of a few changes and a bit of revision To move on in one’s life is a part of the game Because in my experience nothings ever left the same…….. Flight..... Beliefs...... When one believe's their falling in Love and they found an angel that came from above it's easy not to see what's in front of your face and not to know when to give up the chase you think you have found what you need to survive in this world of jealousy and greed but sometimes you get caught for no reason or rhyme at someone else's moment of, just out to kill time They make you believe it's only you they will see but won't hesitate to do it right in front of me I guess for some people it's harder to handle for them to believe it's not really a scandal I know the relationship was only in the beginning and my world was still in the process of spinning but I will learn to believe in nothing at all I will no longer be the one to take the fall to many people have showed me the way to now knowing I will never once again say anything to anyone about how I am involved because of how this world has truely evolved what people will throw away just like a stone and some people cant leave well enough alone Flight...... looking glass...... Looking back on dark days in the past thank God they really weren't to last I really didn't think I could take it anymore cause this feeling I had was burnig to the core I think you know exactly what I mean when you feel like coming apart at the seam when someone has filled your life with ups and downs and eventually turns your smiles in to frowns to rip the carpet from under your feet and throw the rest of you out on the street there comes a time you must learn to close the door because you dont have to take it anymore you must stand up and push back the pain and think to yourself this wont happen again believe there is going to be a brighter day and hold your head up and be proud to say that you'll be the one to hold true cause everyone else is entitled to thier own view Flight...... Do you feel it...... As I watch the clouds roll in to cover the skies I ponder the memories that lay behind these eyes the thoughts of you and the time we had I cant help at this point but to feel so sad the only way to feel you is through letters on a screen trying to figure out what they all might mean I call out to you through thoughts in my mind hoping that in your heart you will soon find the time to think of me now and then and find the path to be together again to believe that we are the ones for one another so we can live our lives forever together to leave behind all the worries and fear so you will feel the warmth of my heart so near I know you are so far away from me right now but if you listen to your heart it will show you how to believe what you feel is the passion of your heart and you deserve that love we had right from the start. Flight..... At the beach!!!!!!! To walk along the sands of time now knowing that you will always be mine hand in hand until the morning light as the sun breaks through the dark of night even though it is a beautiful sunrise it doesn't compare to the colour of your eyes splashing each other at the waters edge there I know I will make my pledge to forever be with you, and become as one at that point nothing will be left undone to live my days and nights with you to show my love through and through to look out across the liquid devine there I will make you truely mine gazing at each other as we step to the ocean and have another sip of it's magic potion that remedy that will forever hold the secret of love is what I am told as we watch the roll of the waves softly break hopefully in your boots I will make you shake as you walk with me, you'll learn how to discover how we are to become each others lover and how things will always be within reach as long as you walk with me along the beach. Flight..... Personal Reflection..... I somewhat struggle with the images that float along the rivers of my mind these pictures that are nailed to the bounderies of being so unkind It's been hard to this point to exactly see everything that might and might not be with you being all those miles away raging wars upon myself I try and stay All that I have is the memory of you and I answering a question to try and know why erupting a volcano of mistrust and deceite making us feel so lost and incomplete as once said, could be a road one must walk letting you know that we must always talk believe in love once again in your heart leading us back to where we can start look inside of your mind it's all within reach just release the fears before they may breach come out from underneath that shroud feel the rain as it falls throught the cloud guide your soul into the light with all of your lasting might drift on the tides and you may find, the feeling that is not so unkind find your soul in the sunrise rise up as the emptiness subsides be as one, together, you can feel forever, rise up together search and you will find the answer if you look deep inside your mind you can always be sure to find that you can see forever, let's rise up together...... Flight..... Morning eyes...... As the day dawned new, I looked over at you, sleeping so sound, the sun all around. the calm on your face, could not be erased, as sleep was still strong, I just tried to prolong, that feeling so sweet, the air filled with heat, with memories of last night, the thoughts I won't fight. I'll have them all day, so then if I may, say thanks for giving me, you and the memory, for the sight of you sleeping, in my heart I'll be keeping. A.K. |