Carbonella's

New Prompt: write a story or poem about the last 5 minutes a store is open.

Carbonella’s

         The door swung shut behind them. Goose, Little Jim, Skitch and Joe slid to a stop, piling into each other like a row of too soon toppled dominoes. They stared. Their eyes wide, their mouths open, they stood there and stared.

         It was Carbonella’s; World Famous Carbonellas, the Mecca for all sportsmen everywhere; the chain store of chain stores. The store had everything a sportsman could possibly imagine from a Sea World sized aquarium full of trophy fish to restrooms marked “Buck” and “Doe”. And they were there. They had finally made the journey. A pilgrimage made by sportsman everywhere across the continent to the Carbonella’s nearest them. Never mind that they drove 250 miles out of their way or as Little Jim put it, “Come on, Joe. It’s practically on our way,” they were there. Never mind that it was almost closing time. It just simply didn’t matter. This was way better than the Carbonella’s catalog or the web site.

         As they tried to take it all in, a loudspeaker crackled to life.

         “May I have your attention, please? The store will be closing in five minutes. Please take all your purchases to the nearest register.”

         Goose and Skitch made a dash for the escalator. Little Jim and Joe simply stood there, staring, trying to absorb as much of the scene in front of them as possible.. Five minutes to closing, five minutes to closing. Where to go? What to see? What to buy?

         The loudspeaker crackled to life.

         “Cleanup in aisle 5.”

         “Whoa”, said Little Jim. “That ought to be a lot of fun.

         Why’s that?” Joe inquired.

         “Aisle five is where they keep the stinkbait.”

         I thought you said you’ve never been here before?” Joe asked as they finally uprooted themselves and walked farther into the store. They passed the clearance racks and were walking past a line of smokers, one of which had some sausage hanging in it.

         “I haven’t. First time I’ve been in a Carbonella’s,” replied Jim. “Now where do you want to go? We’ve only got five minutes.

         The loudspeaker crackled to life.

         “Cleanup in aisle 17.”

         Confidently Little Jim added. “That’s the Marine section. Inflatable boats if I’m not mistaken.”

         Joe looked accusingly at him.

         “Honest Joe, I’ve never been here. Every Carbonellas is the same and I memorized the store layout from their website in anticipation of one day setting foot inside the doors. Didn’t you? Now where do you want to go? Time’s a wasting.”

         “No, Jim, I didn’t. In fact I didn’t even know they had a website. I have no clue where to go. But I should buy something to show I was here.” They paused in front of a rack of Carbonella’s tee-shirts. Litlle Jim took one off the rack and looked at Joe. Joe shook his head no.

         “Okay, Do you want to see…

         “Cleanup in aisle 12.”

         Joe looked expectantly at Little Jim.

         “Fishing rods, surf casting.” Jim offered confidently. “How about we make a pass through the mounted animals, they’ve got some great looking taxidermy mounts. You keep an eye out for your Carbonella’s souvenier. Along the way we’ll make a loop through the gunroom and finish up down at the aquarium to see all the fish. They probably got a couple of huge fish, they usually do…according to the website.” With that Jim was off at a trot. Joe struggled to keep up, his head swinging from side to side, his senses overwhelmed at the variety of merchandise.

         “Cleanup in aisle 32”

         “Snack food and drinks.” Jim called out over his shoulder as they cruised through the non-typical whitetail deer mounts..

         Joe nodded his head. He wondered what he should buy. There were Carbonella’s hats, Carbonella’s coffee mugs, Carbonella dishes and even furniture. All of it seemed so blasé. Whatever he found it would have to be something unique, something unusual. Something useful.

         The gunroom was magnificent…and expensive. Once or twice Joe felt the tug of his credit card but he resisted buying that hand engraved Italian shotgun that he knew would just be perfect for grouse. And it was only eight thousand dollars. He was sure the wife would understand. After all he only had three other shotguns…and none of them were Italian.

         “Didn’t you find anything yet?” asked an exasperated and excited Little Jim.

         Just at that moment they rounded a corner and there it was; a giant, three-foot long red and white fishing plug that was easily two foot longer than any fish Joe had ever caught. It was only $39.95! Joe reached for his credit card and grabbed the lure from the shelf. They headed for the aquarium. He wondered if it was too big for muskies. Jim looked at him, shook his head and sighed. At least he didn’t pick the talking bass, he thought.

         “Security to the aquarium! Security to the aquarium! Immediately!”

          They rounded the corner at the aquarium just as Security arrived from the other direction. A large splash of water landed at their feet. It was followed by an excited, “I got’em!” Security, Little Jim and Joe stopped dead in their tracks. An inflatable boat was bobbing across the top of the aquarium. At one end sat Skitch, his arm, coated in stinkbait, holding up the largest blue catfish Joe had ever seen. Seems he “noodled him” using the stinkbait as an attractant.At the other end sat Goose with a surfcasting rod bouncing a large white jig in front of a striped bass trying to entice him to hit. Various snack foods and a six-pack of Yoo-Hoo lay in the bottom of the boat. Several potato chips floated on the water and the wrapper to a beef stick sank slowly to the bottom.

         Joe sighed as he handed the clerk his credit card. Banned, he thought. Banned for life from Carbonella’s. How could he ever explain it to anyone? The clerk handed Joe back his card with a smirk.

         “The store is now closed. Thanks for shopping at Carbonella’s. Have a nice day.”

         As security escorted them out the door Goose remarked, “Shoot Joe, Don’t worry none. We’ve been kicked out of better places.”

“ I don’t understand what the problem was. If they didn’t want us to catch the fish, why’d they put’m in the middle of a store full of fishing equipment?They’re just lucky we didn’t have time to put on the scuba gear,” commented Skitch.

Goose nodded his head in agreement. “Besides,” he added, “It’s not like we weren’t practicing catch and release.”

          “Look, across the street, isn’t that a Yonder Mountain store? Looks like they’re still open, too,” added Jim as they walked across the lot to their truck. "And they've got an indoor archery range!"