jovial poem about the sterotypical differences between men and women |
Slap on a CD, turn up the bass then To the bathroom and put on your face. Tonight Makeup takes about ten minutes more so Straighten your hair: it looks shit. You put it up. Tut tut. You shoulda known right there it wouldn’t Go with your footwear. Change of shoes means Change of dress. Stop and sing to the song You love best then change again. And again As your temperament rises. The kindness of voice When you spoke to the pizza boy makes you More annoyed. That fuckin cats in the way again So go on, give it a kick as it burns down your wick. Finally, Accessorise. All to match your eye shine and Your on time. Nice. Meanwhile… Take a piss. Look at this your beards growin legs! Swig the dregs from the can, nah, your face’ll be fine. It’s not like she put in an effort last time. Nothings on the telly but your finger flicking fun Runs on. Check the clock and get up. Brush your teeth, lynx yourself, then its time to go But no. The Simpson’s on and it’s the one with Senor ding dong and the bell that won’t stop ringing. So sit back down ‘cause you know she’ll just be singing in the mirror. Then go. Fifteen minutes late but she’ll be later tho’, ’cause You know what women are like. |