Memories - Family Traditions

Memories - Family Traditions
By Stephen A Abell

Number of words: 3306



As he stared into the burning fire, he smiled. He loved Christmas. It was family time. A time to gather around: to talk; to share dreams; to give love. The warmth that filled his heart did not come from the fireplace.

He turned around as his grandchildren came rushing through the doorway from the kitchen. Pearly white teeth showed in his smile as he opened his arms to embrace the three teenage boys. “So then, you lot, are ya’ excited ‘bout t’morra’?” His own excitement enthused in his words.

“Ah, Granddad!” Mike sighed dejectedly, “We’re not kids anymore…”

“We know there ain’t no Santa.” Jimmy continued his older brother’s sentence. “We’ve been buyin’ our own pressies for the last five years, ya’ know.”

“Bur ‘e’s lookin’ forward to ridin’ ‘is new mountain bike though, ain’t ya’ Jim?” Eddy put in.

“Better than that ugly lass, from the village, you’re ridin’ at the moment.” Mike laughed and Eddy added his own joviality in agreement.

“Least I got someone,” Jimmy retorted smartly, “beats spankin’ ya’sen’ blind.”

“Hey now. Come on lads, no bickerin’ from any of ya’. ‘specially not t’night of all nights. Ya' know Santa won’t come a callin’ on the likes of bad lads. There’ll be no presents, just a lump of coal to show ya’ how grateful ya’ should be.”

“We’re OK ain’t we bro?” Eddy slapped Mike’s back, “Jim there’s the black sheep o’ this family, ain’t ‘e?”

“Sure is Ed, sure is.”

“Be said.” Granddad raised his hand as if he meant to give someone a fatal blow. All quieted. “Now,” he lowered his arm, “that’s better. Listen, here come ya’ Ma and Pa.” He moved over to the armchair by the side of the fire. As he lowered himself into it his son and wife entered the living room. He looked up at his son and smiled. Bob nodded his consent. “Right then lads, gather 'round, get comfy, get warm, it’s time for a story.”

“Bloody ‘ell, ‘e ‘as flipped,” Jimmy said doubtfully, “Granddad, like Mike said, we ain’t kids.”

“Hush up boys, afore ya’ father there takes a cane to ya’ backsides. This tale, well, it’s about me, when I was 'bout Mike’s age.” He saw the look of disappointment on the teenage faces. “Now let me get to it or we’ll be here all night, an’ that wouldn’t be right 'cause there’s a special surprise for ya’all at the end.” He waited a couple of seconds, when none of the boys made to speak he continued with a smile. His memories washed over him.

“I was ‘bout Mike’s age when the accident happened. Me’self and me brothers lived with our Ma’ and Pa’ on the farm that your Uncle John now has. We had no cattle, no pigs, no sheep. We had no livestock whatsoever. We farmed crops, ya’ see. All those lovely veggies that ya’all don’t like and leave on ya’ plates, so’s ya’ Ma’ can give ‘em to the dogs for scraps.

“Well, there was a war going on at the time. Not one of these small little scrapes we have at the moment, but a full blown world war. The second one of it’s kind, to be exact. Now the war didn’t bother us none. All we’d get to see was the fighters and bombers flying over the farm. We’d all rush out and watch, but as all things do, it got old an' quick. The only other thing the war did for us was to bring Charlie to our house. Charlie had lived in London with his Ma’ an’ Pa’. His Pa' had gone off to fight the Gerry’s an’ his Ma’ had died when them Gerry’s bombed their house. So Charlie was an orphan, an’ they shipped the orphan’s outta London so’s they’d be safe. Charlie was shipped to us.

“As I can remember he wasn’t a bad boy, a little on the large side, but he pitched straight in and helped us out on the farm. If me memories correct, he brought in most of the harvest that year he was with us.

“It was a week before Christmas and all of us were out playing in the back field, behind the house, as it had snowed for the last three days. We’d all told Charlie about the covered well, but he must have forgot because that’s where he ended up. There was Charlie, running around like a loon, next there was a loud crash and no Charlie. Me brother Rob got to the well first and started shouting after Charlie, but there were no answer. When I got there and look down all I saw was blackness. The well, in them days, was over thirty feet deep. Anyway's, I ran back t'house and found Pa', I grabbed a rope and torch, Pa' brought tractor round. Pa' tied the rope off round the back of the tractor and threw the other end into the silent well, then he was over the side and climbing down. Me and me brothers stood gawping over the edge, all's we could see was the bobbing torch light. Pa' shouted up to Rob, who jumped into the tractor and drove forwards. I remember seein' me Pa come outta that darkness, the rope tied around his and Charlie's waste, Pa's shirt was covered in deep red blood. Me and Mike pulled em free of the well, we noticed that part of Charlie's skull was missin'. It's still down at the bottom of the well today.”

Even though the room was warm he noticed the three boys grimace at the thought. He carried on.

“As I said before, the war was raging and people had to make sacrifices, to help our lads overseas. There was a rationing on so's people here were short of food. We'd always exchanged some veggies for a nice joint and a bird from Joshua, who had livestock. But, what with government and Joshua's herd getting hit by foot and mouth, we were starrin' at a bleak and hungry Christmas. Now Pa', even though he was a farmer, he was a clever man and in an evening he'd have his head in a book, a newspaper, or even a magazine. He told us how certain tribes in Africa eat their dead and how explorers, lost on snowy, mountains would kill their friends just to eat them and stay alive. I look back now and wonder how this thought hadn't sickened us, not for one minute. The only downside to what Pa' was proposin' was voiced by our Ma' “How do we cut the poor little bugger up? We ain't butchers, love.” Well Pa' just smiled at this question and said. “Me brother will help.”

“Now me Uncle Jack, Pa's brother, was a butcher and a mighty fine one, he turned up the night before Christmas Eve. I remember opening the door to him, he stood six foot and he was a wide man, I don't mean fat, I mean muscle. He stood there in the doorway, the brim of black trilby pulled down, a thick black wool long coat accentuated his form. In his left hand he held a bag, like that of a doctor, in his right was the hand a very beautiful lady. “Mind out, son.” He said as he barrelled past me, pulling the redhead behind him. “It's bitter out there. I swear it’s gone straight to me bones. I need a warm fire and whisky.” Nothin' was said about Charlie that night, there was just good old fashioned merry makin'. The next mornin' though Me and Rob were up at five to dig out Charlie from the snow. We dragged him into the barn where Pa' had set up a makeshift table. “Over here boys.” Uncle Jack shouted as we struggled with the weight. He was stood over to one side under a noose that had been thrown over a rafter, the other end was tied to the back of the tractor.

““What's that for?” Rob asked

“”We needs to get the blood outta this young fella, before ya' start, otherwise it's apt to be messier than it should. Now put his feet through the noose and draw it tight. Rob, you're the oldest, right?” Rob nodded. “Right, so this time you get the honours and ya' brother gets the tractor.” I ran and climbed up into the seat, and then looked back. Pa' had told us both to pay heed to Uncle Jack as we may never know when we'd need the skills he'd teach us. Uncle Jack held out his arm and I saw the machete for the first time. “I hope ya's a strong lad 'cause ya's gotta do this the first time, one quick stroke straight through his neck and his head'll come clean off. The ya' drive forward.” He pointed straight at me. “So all the blood drains outta him.” Well it took Rob just a few seconds to get his breath, he raised that machete in the air and brought it down fast and right on target. I heard the bone crack and saw the head start to roll, I turned and started forward, slowly until Uncle Jack shouted for me to stop. We watched in silence as the blood poured from the open neck. It took about a half hour for the body to loose most of its liquid. I said body because at this time it had stopped being Charlie and had begun to be food.

“Uncle Jack then talked Rob through the art of butchery, from removing the organs and guts, by making an incision below the penis and straight down to the base of the neck, to filleting the best pieces of meat from the bones. The worst part for us was havin' to stick our hands into the body an' scoop out the heart, liver, kidneys, stomach, and intestines. Our dogs had a feast too that Christmas. The stomach and intestines would join the bones in the bottom of the well. By seven Ma' had the meat slow roastin' in the oven. I mean, at the time, who new what temperature and how long it needed. There just were no cookbooks for this sort of feast.

“I can’t remember what Santa brought me or me brothers that year, but I can remember that meal. The meat was simply the best we'd ever tasted, succulent and mouth waterin'. Ah, it was a feast fit for a king. Even the beautiful red-headed Mary asked Ma' for the recipe.

“Uncle Jack was the one to broach New Years. “Y'all have enough meat t'last for three days, mayhap four, so what ya' doin' for New Years? Ma' said that we'd not thought of that. “Good job I did, then.” he replied. “That's why I brought Mary. She's my present to y'all.” Luckily the lady in question had taken 'erself off t'little ladies room at that time. Seein' the shocked faces around the table he continued. “I estimated a little boy, no matter how big, wouldn't go too far. Now a plumper lady, she may stretch for a week,” he glanced over at me Pa' and tipped him a wink, “an' I know ya' like a bit of breast.” He smiled.

“”That's murder.” Pa' piped up. “That's what ya' proposin', ya' know that don't ya'?”

“Well, I see it like this. If ya' get caught for the lad, y'all swing, likely as not. So's ya might as well have a bit of fun, an'all.” He stood up from the table. “I'm goin' upstairs an' I'm goin' to tie her t'our bed, she won't make a fuss, ya' see, 'cause she's a “lady of the night”, ya' know what I'm sayin'? Then the rest is up to y'all. I'm goin' t'have my way first, all of ya' are welcome t'watch.” With that, he turned and we heard him stomp up the stairs.

“We sat in silence, for what seamed like forever. But it was only 'till Mary started “Ooohhh'in' an' Aaahhh'in'” that Rob an' t'other lads were on their feet.

“”Hey!” Pa' shouted. “Just where do ya' think ya' going?”

“”It's Christmas Pa'.” Rob said with his little lost puppy dog face, the words ran sickly sweet from his mouth. “I'm only gonna play with the present Uncle Jack bought us.” James and John both piped up “Me too!” at the same time an' broke out laughin'.

“Ma' smiled across at me Pa' an' said. “Let 'em go an have their fun, they've spent all their time helpin' on't farm. Rob's eighteen, Mike's sixteen, the twins are fifteen and none of 'em has a girl. Let 'em get some practise. I mean, Jack's probably paid a lot of money for this, why waste her. Anyway's it's better than porkin' a pig over at Joshua's.”

“”Well, al'rate.” Pa' conceded. “But, y'all ask to leave the table. We didn't raise any yobs.”

““May we all be excused?” I asked. Pa' nodded an' we ran up stairs to play.

“Boy did we 'ave our fun. Uncle was just climbin' off her, his cum drippin' from his cock and outta her cunt. Mary enticed us on, “Come on in lads, the more's the merrier. Right then, eldest first in Mary's hole, the rest will have to make do with me mouth for now.” Well this lady knew what she was doin' all four on us came within seconds of pushin' it in. She told is it didn't matter, no need to be ashamed, she said, happens to a lot of men, and she were right. As she sucked on our Uncle's dick, all ours were back, standin' at attention in no time. We learnt a lot that day, if there was a kink then Mary was into it. She begged to be fucked harder, and to be smacked while we did it. We all had to call her dirty names and then she made us grease up and stick our cocks into her bum hole. I swear you could feel her shit up there, an’ she licked your todger clean after. God she was great.

“It was Ma' that spoiled it.

“Uncle Jack had gone downstairs to coax her and Pa' into coming' upstairs and take their turns on't “Christmas Bird”, as he called her. It was the present that Jack gave her that persuaded her.

“Into the bedroom she walks, holdin' a large bone in her hand. We found out later it were part of Charlie, it was the bone that went from hip to knee. Well Mary was wide eyed to say the least. “I don't do women.” She shouted and, for the first time, tried to get out of the rope. Her panic escalatin' with every try.

“”Well,” Ma' says, “this ain't part of a woman,” as she waved the bone in the air, “it's part of a man, so's we both gonna get a bloke.” She smiled.

“”What the fuck do ya mean, a man.” Mary was really pulling' hard at the binds, I noticed her wrists start to bleed.

“”He were our Christmas dinner, you said you enjoyed him. That you'd never tasted anything like it.”

“Well Mary let out such a scream, we all clapped our hands over our ears, except Ma' who whacked her on the head with Charlie. “We'll have none of that.””

“She moved us outta the room and closed the door. One of the twins pushed it open a little, they were always nosy, still are. Anyway, our Ma' dropped her skirt, but left her knickers on, so's we never got to see her woman's parts, then with the help of Pa' she climbed on't bed, leaned over and rammed one end of Charlie up Mary's well used pussy. Ma' then slowly lowered 'erself on't other end. Boy could our Ma' wail. We'd never heard her make so much noise. Women are lucky, they can cum loadsa times. In the half hour she musta come ten times, Pa' had to call Uncle Jack to hold her upright as her legs were shakin’. It were Rob that noticed, Mary was bleedin' from her pussy, the end of Charlie that was inside her must’ave had a sharp bit. She was screamin' in pain, that only egged Ma' on. Then suddenly Ma’ shook violently and collapsed to the floor.

“Uncle Jack pulled Charlie outta Mary and shook his head at the mess. Mary started ravin' at how fuckin' sick we were. We were fuckin' loonies. Ma had pulled herself off the floor and put her skirt back on, she looked as the blood tainted her white sheets. “We may be fuckin' loonies, but we ain't fuckin' rich you whore, look at the mess you've made of my sheets.”

“”You want mess, well try this.” Mary's face turned red as she pushed.

“Ma' screamed “You bitch.” as stinking shit stained Ma’s sheets even more. We rushed into the room in time to see Ma’ go berserk, pick it up, and push it into Mary's face. “This is all ya' worth, ya stinkin' whore.” Then she rushed around to the foot of the bed and picked up Charlie, then returned to Mary's side. “Here, let me help you swallow that.” She brought one end of Charlie down so hard we all heard it smash teeth. Mary opened up her mouth in pain. That was her big mistake. Ma pushed down hard and ya could see the round bit of the bone as it worked down Mary's throat.

“Pa' and Uncle Jack tried to pull Ma away but she held tight 'till the end. Mary choked to death on Charlie's bone.

“Ya could say we were all a little upset 'cause now our present were broke. We all took off for the front room, the radio and the fire. When Pa’ hadn't come down t'join us after an hour the twins disappeared upstairs to see why. Pa' wasn't lettin' a small thing like death stop him, the twins rushed down and told us all he was fuckin' Mary. We left 'im to it; Pa’ got awful mad if he were interrupted.

“We all cleaned up the mess after Pa’ was done and took Mary on out’ta barn for Boxing Day preparing. Rob asked me if I wanted another turn but I tolds him, "I like action in my Christmas birds when they get stuffed, ya might say", and he agreed.

“She was mighty tasty, an’ had a little more meat than poor ol’ Charlie. She nearly made it to New Years, bless her.”

The boy's, sat in front of the fire, looked at each other, dumbfounded by Granddad's story. Jimmy was about to open his mouth and ask a question when the noise from upstairs drew their attention away from the smiling old man. It sounded like a muffled shout, and a few quiet bangs. They looked back at Granddad. His smiled was that of the many teethed Cheshire cat.

“Sounds as if ya' Christmas cracker has woke up.” He beckoned his grandchildren to stand, when they were on their feet he said. “Go on, run along and play nice ya’ fuckin' loonies.” He was laughing as the three boys took off in search of their present.

He reached over the arm of the chair and lifted up his rucksack. He opened it slowly and looked across coyly at his daughter in law. He saw the mischief in her eyes. He quickly pulled out Charlie and threw it across to her.

“Now, you two run along and have your fun too.” He sat back in the chair. “I'll be up later, after these old bones have warmed through.” He closed his eyes and dosed off as the screams filled the farm, a soft, gentle smile on his lips.