Self Doubt - a micro story

You were singing karaoke, Patsy Kline I think. We were all watching you from across the room and while you were singing, you kept looking at me. Only me. You would look at the screen for a while, then look to your left, right at me. You would look at me for as long as you could, until you had to look back at the screen to read the words. It wasn’t a seductive look or a look of curiosity to see if I was listening. Through your eyes you were leaning on me. I couldn’t look away. I knew that this was going to be bad. I would fall in love only to convince myself that you’re not interested in me, without ever talking to you. Too late.

You were looking at me. Through your eyes, you were leaning on me. “Your eyes, it’s a days work looking into them.”


Torture. That’s the only way to describe it. It feels as if an elephant is standing on my chest.

Self doubt. That is what has happened to me.