Double Love

Double Love

What was my locker combo??? This is just great! Where’d I put it? “AH HAH! Found you, you little sneak!” I look around and see a guy looking at me weirdly. He had dark chocolate brown hair with grey eyes and was the cutest guy I had ever seen. I gave him a weak smile. He smiled back and kept walking. I turned back to my locker and hit my head against the open door. A little screech escaped from me. I heard a low chuckle from down the hall. Perfect! First I lose my locker combo, then when I find it, a totally hot guy sees me talking to the sheet of paper, and whack my head on the locker. Perfect start to the year!

“You are late young lady,”
“I so am not! Well…only 5 minutes. But who cares?”
“I do. You can stay back after class for 10mins. 5 for the time you missed, and 5 for talking back to a teacher. Understood?”
“Yippee…I mean, yes, sir.” I rolled my eyes and turned to find a seat. There was exactly one spare seat. I counted. It was right in front of Mr Jurd’s desk. I heard a familiar chuckle. My eyes darted around the room, landing on the same dark haired guy I saw this morning. A blush crept up my cheeks and I settled at my desk. One whole period of this old dude droning on about the past; how fun! Ugh. My life sucks. I bang my head against the table gently. “Is there a problem Miss Warner?” My head shot up, and I see Mr Jurd glaring down at me. I look at him, “No, Mr Jurd. Everything’s fine,” I say, imitating his accent of rolling his r’s. I hear some people stifling their laugh’s.
“Okay. So you wouldn’t have trouble answering this question?”
“None at all.”
“You sound sure of yourself Miss Warner,”
“Yes I do. I’m also very sure that my name is Jennifer, not Miss Warner.”
“You just earned yourself 5 more minutes after class. Your question is, was there or was there not a king of Rome, who sparked the civil war in 49B.C?”
History sucks. I guess it helps that I’m a wiz at it! “Yes there was. His name was Julius Caesar. He was a military genius, and one of the most influential people of his time.”
Mr Jurd raised his eyebrows, “Very good Jennifer.” I smirked and lay my head back on the desk. He left me alone after that.

The rest of the day was not much different from the first period. Me talking back to teachers, and answering all their questions correct. I loved the surprise on their face as I answered the questions right. By the end of the day, I made precisely 5 enemies (the 5 teachers I had), and countless friends. I was initiated into the geek clique. This didn’t bother me. I had no intention of being a ‘cool kid’. I found out that the boy with dark hair had a name. It was Roy Watson. He had a twin brother, Ray Watson. I also found out, much to my dismay that he was in my Maths, Science, English, History and French classes. I had already decided that I didn’t like him. He was a jock, but smart. He was the ‘it’ guy. He was so completely up himself, it reminded me of me! There can’t be two me’s in a school now can there? So I despised him. His brother on the other hand, was identical to Roy. He was sporty and smart too. But Ray was a rebel. He’s been sent to the principles office so many times that no one keeps track of it anymore. Ray was less up himself and hung out with the rebels. Ray was in my Math and Science class.
I became friendly enemies with both of them. Ray and I would compete to see who could piss the teacher off quicker, and Roy and I would compete to see who could get a better answer. I know. My life is soo sad.
Roy always seemed to be there when I made a fool of myself. Whenever he passed me in the hallway, he’d tease and mimic me. I’d glare and him, making him laugh. Then both of us would keep walking. Ray and I were more friends than enemies. We got along better, though his psycho routines scared me occasionally.

Soon we became well acquainted, and he would stop me in the hallway to talk to me about some random things, and we would end up talking for ages. People looked at me weirdly. I was a geek, and I talked to rebels. Man I was a weirdo. Nelly and Tamryn, my new friends, constantly teased me about Ray liking me. I didn’t answer. Secretly I think I liked both twins equally. I didn’t want to say anything because people would call me a slut and who knows what other names.

Roy and I shared a friendly rivalry. When he stopped me, it was always between classes so we couldn’t talk for long, and I couldn’t retort at his teasing. So I grew to ignore him when he talked to me out of class. The first time Nelly and Tamryn were there to see me snub Roy off, they gawped. “Do you even know who he is?” Nelly whispered.
“Duh. Roy Watson. Smart-ass in just about all my classes. Why is everyone staring at me?”
“You just snubbed Roy… Roy the hottest most popular guy in the school. Do you know how many girls would like die if he looked their way?”
I rolled my eyes, “Thank god I’m not one of those girls or I’ll be dead so many times over I can’t even count.”
They stared at me, “He’s looked at you that many times?”
I rolled my eyes again and started walking off. They could be so childish sometimes.

Over the next weeks, I got to know the people in my year and met many people. I learned to live with the stares everyone gave me every time either Ray or Roy looked at me. They were the hottest guys in the school. I got used to it, and even started liking it. In fact it boosted my ego, and I kinda turned into a snob in most peoples eyes. I would fling my hair behind me. Suddenly I was like the hottest girl in school. I mean I always had someone wanting to go out with me, but this is great. I’m single and friends with the hottest guys in my year. It came as a huge shock when I learnt that Roy asked Mandy out. Mandy was the equivalent of Roy, in female form. They had been on and off throughout the years. Apparently, Mandy was the only girl he’s been out with since he came to the school 2 years ago. I found myself getting annoyed at him. Did he think he was above going out with anyone other than his equivalent? I got short tempered whenever he talked to me and gave him an ice cold glare whenever he so much as looked at me. I could see his confusion.
The next day, Roy stopped me once again in the hallway, but this time, he pulled me aside. I glared at him, “What?”
He laughed, “Are you this rude to everybody? Or just me?”
“Just you.”
He laughed again, but then stopped and became serious. I had never seen him like this. It was kinda scary staring into his deep grey eyes. I felt a blush rush up my cheeks. Why was I blushing? What was I doing? “If that’s all, I think I’ll leave now.” And I walked off, leaving him looking like a lost puppy. I heard he call out after me, but that just induced me to walk faster; right into a hard, sturdy body. Arms encircled me automatically as I stumbled.

I looked up to see Ray’s eyes looking at me concernedly, “Are you alright Jen?”
I nodded, “Perfectly fine if you don’t count your brother being an idiot again.”
He chuckled, it was the same low chuckle Roy had. I gazed at him; his features identical to that of Roys except for his dyed black hair. I couldn’t help myself. I wanted to get back at Roy for who knows what. I stood on my tiptoes and gave him a peck on his lips. He looked down at me in surprise. What am I doing? Did I just kiss Ray? I’ve never been so daring before! I ducked my head, and felt a finger underneath my chin, pushing it up. I looked up at his enticing grey eyes and got lost in it. Suddenly I felt ever so conscious of his arm still around my waist supporting me. I couldn’t believe it. It was the second time in 5 minutes that I got lost in those grey eyes. If you don’t count the fact that they were on different people!
He slowly lent forward. My eyes closed and my head moved forward as if attracted to a magnet. Our lips met and his arms wrapped around me pulling me closer as mine linked behind his neck. All thought rushed out of my mind as his kiss got deeper. Suddenly Ray jerked back. My eye flew open, and I saw double. Literally. Roy was at Ray’s side, eyes flashing. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“Well I was kissing Jen, until someone rudely interrupted.”
“Yeah well I wouldn’t have if you guys weren’t making out in the middle of the hall!”
I could see a crowd gathering and I stepped between the twins. “Shh! You’re drawing a crowd.” Both sets of greys eyes flicked down at me before continuing to glare at each other. “You call that making out? What do you call what you do with Mandy?”
I looked at one twin to the other. Ray was smirking, and Roy was speechless. Then he looked hard at me, staring at me for what seemed like forever, before turning on his heel and stalking off. I heard Ray snicker before turning to me once again and murmured, “Now where were we?” and he encircled me once again and tried to kiss me. I put my fingers on his lips and pushed him back. He looked shocked. I couldn’t help but laugh. “Roy’s right. We shouldn’t be kissing in the middle of the hallway. I’ll see you at lunch,”
Roy looked taken aback, but finally smiled, “Aw c’mon Jen. You didn’t seem to mind before!”
I raised an eyebrow at him, and with a little smile, walked off. What’s happening to me? Since when was I such a flirt? I could feel hundreds of stares at me as I walked. I refused to let it bother me, and arrived at my next class only 5 minutes late.

Tamryn and Nelly literally squealed when I told them at lunch. “Omigosh! That is sooo romantic! I always thought Ray liked you! But why was Roy so angry? He always kisses Mandy!” I smiled and was about to speak when an arm snaked around my waist and kissed me in the neck. From the open mouths of my friends, I think I could guess who it was. I turned and a set of lips landed on my mine. I unwrapped myself from Ray, still kissing, then finally pulled away. He looked at me earnestly, “I think Roy was just jealous. He likes you, you know Jen?” His eyes flashed angrily
“Yea right. That’s why he’s constantly teasing me.”
Ray looked at me weirdly, than turned his head to his brother and whispered, “You really don’t think he likes you?” I looked over, following his eyes, and connected with Roy’s, which were literally smouldering. He turned back, and wrapped his arms around Mandy, and kissed her. I felt a stab in my gut. Was that jealousy? I looked at Ray, who was still gazing at his brother with what looked like hatred. “Does it really matter Ray. So what if he likes me? I kissed you. Not him” I said quietly. He pulled me into his arms and I snuggled into his chest. We sat like that the whole lunch, in silence. Nelly and Tamryn were loss for words. The bell rang, indicating the end of lunch. I could almost hear Nelly and Tamryn’s sigh of relief. “See ya later Jen” and they rushed off.
Ray stood up, and held out a hand to help me up. “So…” he rubbed the back of his neck, “go out with me Jen?” I smiled and put my hands on either shoulder and tiptoed to give him a gentle kiss, “okay.” He pulled me into a hug before we separated for our classes.

I’m in love! Ray was so sweet, constantly hovering near me as if to protect me. When I pointed this out to him, he just scoffed, but didn’t make a move to leave. Roy no longer stopped me in the hall, and when my eyes happened to catch his, he would turn away and if Mandy was there, kiss her. The now familiar stabbing pain would occur then. I would turn and seek comfort in Ray’s arms. Classes without Ray were close to unbearable, but not for the obvious reason of simply being without Ray. No. It concerned his brother, Roy. I couldn’t stand that he wouldn’t talk to me. I was hurt. I never thought we were close, but it seems we were. I would catch myself a thousand times in class wanting to say some stupid quirk to Roy, before I realised that he wasn’t talking to me. In just about every class, Roy would notice me turning to him, opening my mouth to say something, but decide against it and turn away. At these times, he would sit staring at me. It got extremely uncomfortable under his gaze so I would turn to try make eye contact, but he was too fast. I felt wounded. One day it just got too much. As I turned away, I felt tears build up in my eyes, and I asked to be excused for class. I ran out to the corner, where I first got lost in Roy’s eyes, and slumped down as tears started rolling down my cheeks.

I heard footsteps, and could sense that it was Roy before he sat down next to me and muttered, “Are you alright?”
I turned to him in amazement, “Are you really asking me that?” I shook my head in disbelief and then let him have it, “First you go out with Mandy, than when you see me kissing Ray, you close to bash him up. Now that I’m going out with him, you’re ignoring me. I don’t get it Roy! What did I do to make you so pissed off with me? Why can’t you let Ray and I be.” I realised my voice was getting louder to I lower my voice and whispered, “Why?”
Roy looked at me with such sorrow that it nearly broke my heart. “I didn’t think you’d be this blind.” He said and got up to leave. He made it a couple of steps before turning around upon hearing my sobs. He strode to me, knelt down in front of me, placed his hands on either side of my face and pulled me into a kiss. I clung to him, he kissed me with such passion I never wanted to let go; but then I came to my senses and planted my hands on his chest and pushed. He stumbled back looking confused.
“Roy! Do you remember my boyfriend, your brother? Ray? Ring a bell? How about your girlfriend, Mandy?” I was furious. How dare he make me betray Ray!
“You asked me a question. I couldn’t answer it by words, so I showed you.”
I looked at him bewildered, then it clicked. I shook my head wearily, “Don’t do this to me Roy. Don’t make me choose. You have your girlfriend. I have my boyfriend. Please. If that’s how you feel about me, then spare me. Don’t do this to me.” With that I walked off back to class.
I was distant and walked around in a daze for the rest of the day. Ray asked me many times what was wrong, but I just shook my head and continued with whatever I was doing.

I tried not to, but I couldn’t help it. I kept sneaking glances at Roy, and him with his ultra senses would turn and give me that heartbreaking tentative smile. Ray noticed a difference in both me and his brother. If he suspected anything, he sure didn’t show it. He had lost his rebel ways when he started to go out with me, but now it was coming back. I would walk in on him smoking, or not see him in class even though I knew he was in school.
The following day, I heard cries in the hallway after last period. As soon as people saw me, they pointed to a crowd gathering in the middle of the hallway. I heard shouts and voices that became oh so familiar to me. Then I realised what was happening. I broke into a run. I pushed through the cheering crowd to see Roy and Ray in a brawl on the ground. I stared, then started screaming at them to stop as they punched each other all over. I’m sure they heard me, but chose to ignore. I didn’t dare get between them. I had never seen them like this. I knew I was the only one able to stop the fight, but I was scared. I started to sob. Ray heard me and paused to look at me, giving Roy the chance to punch him in the gut. I sobbed harder, wanting to go to him, but paralysed. Now Roy had stopped too and was looking at me. I looked back, then I saw Ray crumple. I gasped and ran to his side and grabbed him before he hit the ground. I hugged him tight whispering soothingly. I smoothed his hair back and kissed him on the forehead. His eyes opened and he gave me a weak smile. I smiled back before beginning to cry again. Ray touched my cheek and pulled me towards him. I obliged, kissing him tenderly. “I was so scared Ray! Never do that again.” He smiled again, and leaning against me, stood up. I put my arm around his shoulder and supported him as he managed to hobble. I glance behind me to see Roy, gazing at me, eyes filled with desire and jealousy. I ignored him and concentrated on Ray.

That night I sat on Ray’s bed, as he lay there, ice packs all over. Roy’s face kept flashing in my mind. His hurt, his desire, his jealousy, his hatred, his sorrow. I couldn’t help but feel guilty. I went straight to Ray, but Roy was in the fight too. My thoughts scrambled as I heard Ray’s moan. I leant over to him, “Does it hurt heaps?” He nodded. “What happened Ray?”
“Roy came up to me after class and said that he kissed you. I didn’t believe him, but he kept going on about it in detail. So I punched him.”
“Oh, baby. You shouldn’t let him get to you.”
“You mean he really kissed you?” I didn’t answer and ducked my head. I heard him mutter under his breath, “That bastard. Now I’m really going to kill him” speaking louder he said to me, “If you still want your boyfriend, you have some serious explaining to do!”
“No! Ray don’t. Please. I don’t want him-you to get hurt. He was confused, so was I. He started ignoring me, glaring at me all the time, I didn’t know what happened; what I did to make him so pissed. I broke down he comforted me.” I drifted off, replaying that kiss over and over again. I saw his sorrowful face, heard his disappointment as he told me of my blindness. Snap out of it girl! Ray stared at me incredulously, “You don’t want him to get hurt? He means more to you than me? I thought you loved me Jen. I never thought you’d betray me like this. You’re even defending him! Please get out.”
I broke down, “No,” I sobbed, “I didn’t mean that Ray. You know you mean the world to me.”
“At one point, I hope that was true, it was true for me to you. But now I see I’m not the one for you.”
“You are! You really are!” I ran over to him and threw my arms around him. I was so confused. I loved Ray, but why did my heart lift ever so slightly at his mention of releasing me from his heart? Again, I saw Roy’s sorrow, felt his passion vibrating through my body as our lips connected. Maybe Ray would give me the same effect. So I leant over and kissed him. I felt nothing. None of the previous excitement and fluttering in my stomach. None of the passion of Roy’s kiss. I pulled away. Ray looked at me with sad eyes, full of sorrow and grief. He knew. He didn’t feel anything either. “Jen, you’ve been the best thing to happen to me. You were all I wished for. I knew right from the beginning that you and Roy belonged together. But I wanted to try. Try to make you see me the way to see him. Deep down I knew I couldn’t do it. Now I see I was wrong. It’s hurt both you and me. Roy’s always gotten what he wanted. I just wanted to prove to him I could take away the one thing he desired most. But I can’t do it anymore. Go to Roy Jen. You guys belong together. One day maybe we can be friends again. So just go to him Jen. He’s waiting for you.”
I sobbed. Mixed emotions flowed through me. I hugged him tighter, his arms wrapped tight around me and stroked my head until I calmed. Then I pulled away from him, “Ray, why did you go out with me? If you knew it couldn’t happen, why did you want to hurt the both us with your hope?” I felt and overwhelming anger at him. He gave me romance, but now he’s pushing me away. All this time it was just for a dum sibling rivalry. Deep down I knew it wasn’t Ray’s fault, but I needed someone to blame. I saw Ray’s pained face, and I softened, “I’m sorry Ray. I never knew. Now I do. I can tell by the lack of feeling in our latest kisses. I wanted to love you. Believe me I did. I don’t know how this happened.” I shook my head weakly.
He smiled tenderly at me, “You never loved me Jen. The feelings in our kisses, it was an illusion. You dated me to make Roy jealous. You were upset when he started going out with Mandy. I was your comfort. The excitement has worn off for you, though not for me. Go to Roy, Jen. He broke up with Mandy this morning. He’s waiting for you.” He nodded at me, giving me his blessing. I gave him one last cold and brief hug before going out of his room to across the hall.

I knocked gently on the door. I heard a muffled, “Go away!”
“Roy. It’s me. Jen. Let me in. We need to talk.”
The door opened almost immediately. Roy’s face lit up when he saw me, then fell. I stepped into the room as he closed the door. He turned away from me and moved to his table to fiddle with something, refusing to make eye contact. I stared at his hunched frame, and my heart filled with love. I knew Ray was right. I wished inside that I never kissed Ray. I could have been with Roy. What are you doing Jen? You just broke up with Ray. You’re already ready to head into another relationship. Slut! I felt like a bitch, until I heard Ray’s voice in my head, Go to Roy. I had his blessing. It’s not like he’s not expecting me to date Roy! I smiled and walked silently up to Roy and wrapped my arms around his waist. He spun around in surprise and looked down at me. I knew I shouldn’t go this fast, but I couldn’t help it. I tiptoed and kissed him. After a while, I pulled away. Roy shook his head, eyes still closed, and tried to pull me back into a kiss. I stroked his cheek and felt him shudder at my touch. His eyes slowly opened, and he realised what he was doing and quickly stepped back, looking guiltily around him before landing back on me, “What about Ray?” He really cares about his brother!
“We broke up.” Roy looked at me expectantly. I moved to his bed and sat down on it tears welling up in my eyes. Roy came and sat next to me, putting his arm round me. I took a deep breath and continued, “He realised that we weren’t meant to be together. He said how much he wanted us to happen, but he’s seen the way I look at you ever since before we started going out. He believes that you and I are meant to be.” I stifled a sob.
“What do you think about that Jen?”
“I can’t tell you,” I saw his face fall even more. I put a finger under his chin and lifted it until he was looking at me, “but I can show you… If you want…” Roy looked at me incredulously, before pulling me into a deep, passionate kiss, inducing my own personal fireworks show. He pulled away for a second to say in a husky voice nearly cracking, “I love you Jen.” Then silenced me with his lips. He loves me! My heart soared. I know Ray’s said it so many times to me, but it feels so right coming out of Roy’s mouth. So real. Now I pulled away, and murmured in his ear, “I love you too Roy.” He gave me a priceless look of joy and kissed me till my lips were swollen.