An old writing loosely based on old video games. |
Ever have one of those days that nothing happens? I thought this was one of those days. Silly me. Well, I got up, still tired from the night before. I haven't been sleeping as much as I should be. Suddenly, the phone rings. It's Karot. “Hey, Karot. What's up?” He answers in a shaky voice, “Remember those corridors of level 46?” “Yeah, why?” Why would he call me about such a trivial thing? I mean. I'm still trying to wake up, here! “Well, I'm there...” He answers in a cold tone. I don't understand exactly what he's trying to tell me. “What? You're playing the game?” “No. I'm actually there. I'm IN the game.” Okay, what's he been smoking? “What?! How can you be in the game?!! Did you have one too many espressos today?” I really hoped that he was kidding. That level's tough! “This is no joke! I'm stuck here, man! I need your help to get out!!” His voice paniced I start to sweat. What was I to do?! “Okay, how do I get in?” “There is a new invention of Lucy's in the Millenial Fair.” “Oh, that's today?!” “Yes! Didn't you hear the fireworks going off this morning?” “No, I guess I was doing something more important...like sleeping.” “Dude! Just get out there and try out the invention so you can save me!” “Okay...” I got dressed and hurried out to the fair. It was right up my street. It was quite a celebration. Vendors were everywhere! I knew Lucy normally set up display of her new inventions in the back of the square. So, I just started running. There were two guards standing in front of the area. A guard stops me before I can enter. “Whoa! You can't go in there, kid. There was just an accident. We can't afford to have another.” I was starting to lose my patience. “That accident was a friend of mine!” I draw my wooden sword. “I'm here to save him!” The guard steps away. “Okay, kid. Your funeral.” I run into where the invention is on display. It looks like some sort of gazebo or something. “What is this?!” Lucy answers my question by confusing me even more. “It's an interdimentional teleporter. It uses the theory of time and space phenomena to transport people places, but this wasn't supposed to happen. Karot was supposed to end up over there...” She points at another gazebo thing. “Okay, whatever. Just do to me what you did to him.” “Are you sure?” She likes me. She always seems to be concerned about me. “Yes! Now let's go!” I stand on the one gazebo that she said he started at. They power up this machine, then I'm transported to a new dimention. All the colors swirl around me as I find myself in an entirely different place. It must've worked. But where am I? I don't remember mountains in the game. Before I can do anything, a bunch of weird looking purple monsters attack me. So, I pick up a stick and whack them over the head. They just vanish. Hmm. Yeah, this must be a game. I slip down the mountain past some mindless monsters playing some mindless game to a small town. Hey, this looks like my home town! No. Who am I kidding, there's no mountain north of my town. I see a castle sticking out of some trees. Hmm, maybe he's there. I enter a forest. It seems quite empty, so I just start skipping along humming my favorite theme song. Until... Dang it! More of those purple monsters attack me! Three of them to be exact. Impatient, I pick one of the monsters up and throw it at the other two, and that's that. I continue on... Ah, finally! I reach the entrance to the castle. The door is wide open, and I just walk in. One of the guards stops me at the door. ”Uh, sorry, dewd, but you can't come in here without permission from the king.” “What?! What king? Where's Karot?” “Uh...You mean Queen Karotia?” Confused, “What? Queen?! But Karot's a guy!” “Well, uh... He looked like the queen...” “He had green spikey hair! What kind of queen has GREEN SPIKEY HAIR?!” “Our queen does, dewd. She's upstairs...but wait! You're not supposed to know that!” I run to the stairs as the guard chases me, but stops at the bottom of the stairs as if he has some sort of phobia of climbing stairs. I shrug and move up several flights of stairs to the queen's quarters. Huffing and panting, “Karot? Are you there?” I hear faint crying. I see Karot in the corner dressed in a huge frilly dress. I try not to laugh. “Karot? Are you okay?” “Hiro? Is that you, Hiro?” “Yeah, it's me, dude!” I come over and put a hand around him. “You look pretty sexeh in your new threads, dude!” He turns and smacks me. Yeah, I deserved that. “Are you here to save me or what?!” He says rather peeved off. “Yeah! But why are you the QUEEN?!” “Just forget about that! These people are morons! Let's just get outta here!” “Okay...” We start running down the stairs and get all the way to the front door before the king and his guards stop us. “What is the meaning of this?!” Screams the king. “This is not your queen! He's my friend, and I'm taking him with me.” “Kidnapping the queen, huh? Guards! Seize them!!!” Guards close in on us. There's no where to go. “I order you to leave us alone!” Karot screams. Everyone listens, too. Nice thinking. We run out, the guards chasing after us, to a portal in the forest. The king comes along, too. “Stop right there!” The king yells. Not listening, we jump into the portal. Once again with the freaking swirling colors! We find ourselves in this room filled with metal. Where the hell are we?! “Where the hell are we?!” I scream. Karot seems to be staring at something. “Doooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooode! Shweet!” He seems to have found something. “What'd you find, dude?” I come over curiously. “It's a robot, dude. I think I can fix it.” He pulls out a screwdriver and starts messing with it and stuff. The robot starts moving. I run out of the room, but he stands there next to it. “There. See?” The robot stands up and says, “Where is the creator?” Confused, I say, “What did he just say?” Karot continues messing with the wires inside the robot. “He must still have a few bugs to work out. Give me a few hours.” He continues slaving over the machine. “Hours?! It's gonna take that long?!!” I'm lost, cold, and the floors are all metal. Oh, well. I better get some sleep. I lay down and say, “Oh well. I better get some sleep.” Then, everything goes black for an undetermined amount of time. Funny music plays for about five seconds, then the lights come back on. “Hey! Wait! I didn't sleep at all!” “Yeah, you did, dude. The funny music played.” He says pointing and laughing at me. “By the way, the robot's fixed.” The robot comes over to me and says “Greetings, Sir Hiro. What is your current condition?” I blink. “What?! I can't talk to this thing. You made his grammar too good!” Karot sighs. “Okay, I'll fix it.” He tweeks it a bit more. “Yo! Hiro! Sup, dude?” Voices the robot. “Uh...Sup, robot.... That'll work.” I smile nervously. “So, where are we?” “I haven't figured that out yet. We seem to be in some deserted city of the future.” “Dude, you're sounding sci fi.” I frown at him. “That's cuz that's what this is, dude!” He snaps back. “Oh....well, how do we get back home?” “I don't know...there's no portals around here.” A bit depressed, I slink down and lay flat on my back. My stomach growls. “Dude, when are we gonna eat? I'm starved!” He sighs. “I don't know, dude. I haven't seen any food anywhere.” I begin to sweat. “Let's try looking outside.” He nods and we go outside followed by the robot. It's a desert out here. No sign of meat or veggies anywhere. We're doomed. In a whiny tone, “We're doooooomed!” He smacks me. “No we're not. We just haven't found anything yet. Besides. It takes days for someone to starve to death.” I swallow deeply. He finds a spot in the sand thats glowing blue. He digs a bit and finds a portal there. “We're saved, dude! Hop in!” “How do I know that won't take us to another hopeless, deserted place?” I say skeptically. “Cuz, surely it's not here. It should take us to some place different, and it might lead home!” He seems pretty joyous about this, but I'm still unsure. “Okay, let's jump in.” We jump into the portal, followed by the robot, and wind up in a beautiful balmy place surrounded by several beautiful women. “We are in PARADISE!!!” The women come around to greet us, and give us large quantities of food and drink. “Wow! We're being treated like kings here!” “Sure beats being treated like a queen, huh Karot?” I smile. “Shut up!” He snaps back. “So when are we going home?” I interrogate. “I don't know. I kinda like it here.” He smiles and enjoys the pampering. “Me too. Let's stay.” We stayed there and lived happily ever after being pampered by all the beautiful women of the world. It was so great, and it didn't even cost anything! Laterz all! |