Life in High Gear - Chapter 2

A final decision.

Chapter 2

         At dinner, Georgia tried her best to concentrate on the conversation. They were currently discussing the latest episode of “Survivor” which she had missed because of a late night at the office. Normally it was a ritual for Matt and her to watch it together with a bowl of popcorn, but a bit glad she missed it; she was getting burnt out on Reality TV. The discussion was cut short when the waitress stopped to check their drinks again. Georgia ordered Sangria, her third. She wasn’t sure if it was numbing her odd mood or encouraging it. She just really didn’t care right now. She was caught in an enigma that she wasn’t sure how to handle. She wanted out. At least she did right at this moment. The conversation was boring her to death. She’d tried everything on the menu and they still came here every Thursday. She didn’t even like these restaurants. She was tired of living to impress. She wanted freedom she wanted to be able to say what she wanted and not fear offending. Matt reached over and placed his hand over hers. His gaze was filled with concern. It wasn’t the concern of “are you okay?” it was the concerned look of “don’t do anything stupid”. She offered him a reassuring smile as she took two swallows from her drink and hoped that it would fend off the argument that would come later.

          “I can’t get over your ring, Georgia,” Jessica said. “It’s just beautiful.”

          “It is, isn’t it?” Georgia looked down at her hand. Her petite hand seemed overwhelmed by the ring. She was tired of feeling like her hand. Tiny and overwhelmed by the society that Matt was pulling her into. However, she couldn’t blame him, she’d let him. Lost in her thoughts she kept talking. “It’s a bit bigger than what I like but you know how Matt is, always compensating for his short comings.” She stopped when she heard Jessica gasp and felt Matt’s heated stare. She blushed and quickly looked at Matt feeling an immediate twist in her stomach. “My God, I’m so sorry. I’ll be back,” she offered and got up to leave. She steadied herself with her chair and hoped that she walked away from the table gracefully. She knew Matt wouldn’t follow her; he’d stay there and try to explain, make excuses for things he didn’t understand. He always did. Always making excuses for her, her lack of social training, her off hand comments, her impulsiveness. She wanted to go back outside to the warm air, the openness, out of this pretentious pit of yuppies. She was cursing her choice of three inch heals on her way toward the door.

          “Nice legs.”

         She turned around to meet the same cool brown eyes of the stranger she saw earlier at the wheel of the Camaro. “Thanks,” she said taming a stray lock of hair behind her ear; trying to get her muddled mind to work properly,” “they’re making their debut from the professional pencil skirt. I haven’t shown my knees in public for three years.” Close enough she thought.

          “Three years, that’s a shame, and they’re wonderful knees,” he said as he eyed her. She had gloriously long legs and vicious curves that made him want to kiss her senseless on the spot. Her walk indicated confidence but he sensed an underlying vulnerability. Her almond eyes were a vivid green and she had a delicate straight nose that would have been harsh on anyone else but blended beautifully with her high cheek bones, and full dusty pink lips. His body reacted instantly and he quickly composed himself, shoving his hands in his pockets and mentally recalling the details of last nights Braves game. “You have a name?”

          “Georgia Bains. I am just stealing a few moments from Yuppieville to regain my senses,” she said offering her hand out and was surprised when it met such a strong rough one. She looked him over. He seemed cool and easy for confronting a member of the opposite sex, her height, dark hair, golden brown eyes, nice build, but not overly. Despite his easy manner, he seemed uncomfortable in his white shirt and red and black tie. She felt her body react in the same manner it had when she saw him earlier and she quickly swallowed down what she recognized as blind lust. “You don’t seem like the type of person that would be here.”

          “I’m not,” he said with the start of a mischievous smile flashing straight white teeth, “I’m trying to get laid.”

          “Ah. So expensive dinner equals sex?”

          “Yeah,” he grinned.

          “Succeeding?”

          “Yeah,” he smiled at her. “I recognized you though. There aren’t many women out there that know engines. How do you?”

          “It rapped too quickly to be a small block, big blocks have a deep lusty sound to them.” She peeked around him at his date. “Doesn’t look much for conversation,” she watched as his blonde date pulled out a compact and picked at something in her teeth. “Your date doesn’t know anything I would guess.”

          “She knows enough to keep my attention, and fortunately it’s not in conversation. How do you know so much?” he said trying to change the subject.

          “She’s typical; pretty young girl looking for a rich, older guy to…”

          “About cars,” he said smiling at her.

          “My uncle had a 396 he bought new.”

          “What happened to it?” he slipped his hands in to his pockets.

          “He sold it years ago. I should really get back to dinner,” but she didn’t turn to leave. His eyes were the color of deep rich whiskey, and as intoxicated as she already was she felt it might be a good idea not to get herself too deep in them.

          “Why did you say I was rich?”

          “I didn’t,” she replied finally breaking his gaze.

          “You most certainly did, I believe it was while you were berating my date’s lack of intellect.”

          “Ah, right. Young looking for a rich guy…”

          “Right.”

          “I wasn’t insinuating, although I know what a car like that costs and I’m sure she does too and that’s why she’s out with you and why you take her to expensive restaurants; you’re trying to keep up a pretense.”

          “And you get that just by looking at her and the few little bits of information that I’ve given you.”

          “I’m very good at reading people.”

          “Hmm, let me try,” he said rubbing his chin, which was showing a bit of a five o’clock shadow. “You have reached a point in your life that you thought you never would. You’re questioning commitment and are wondering if you’re marrying the wrong man.”
She tried to hide her surprise at his dead on hit but knew she failed miserably. If there was one thing she knew about herself it was that her thoughts paraded across her face. “We’re not talking about me; I should get back to dinner.”

          “Hit a sore spot?” he asked leaning in a bit. She smelled sweet, and inviting.

          “No, and I’m not sure exactly what I’m going through right now,” she peered around him to see what was going on at her table. Matt was still deeply involved in what ever they were talking about now, probably stocks or some stupid TV show. “How did you arrive at that conclusion?”

          “The mini skirt and I have a feeling that you’re not the type of person that would be here either or riding in a Beemer.”

          “I’m not but I hardly know you and I’m not going to stand here and talk about things I don’t even understand with a complete stranger.”

          “Fair enough, so we should get to know each other better. Here’s my card; you ever get a free moment from Ken don’t be afraid to call.” He handed her the card and her fingers lightly brushed his. If he didn’t know better he’d think paper was a perfect conductor of electricity.

         She flipped the card over and looked at the back before reading the front. “‘Mid-life Crisis Auto Body, specializing in complete muscle car restoration’, cute.”

          “Would you expect anything less from me?” he teased.

          “Even though I don’t know you somehow I wouldn’t,” she paused to look for his name, “Chance Parker.”

          “So what are you going to tell your date?”

          “You’re my cousin. I hope I see you around,” he said embracing her. “You need to hug me back or she’ll never by this,” he whispered in her ear.

         She quickly wrapped her arms around him feeling solid muscle under his dress shirt. He smelled like car exhaust and musk and she didn’t immediately let go. In the wanton part of her mind, she wished he would give her a friendly kiss to find out what his lips felt like. “Me too. See you ‘round cousin.”

         He walked back to his table where the pretty blonde sat waiting. She turned back to her own table and suppressed the urge to smile.

         Later that night, after the usual sex with Matt, she lay on her back on their 500 thread count Egyptian cotton sheets thinking about her “cousin” Chance Parker. What were the chances that he was going to the same place? He was obviously a bit piggish and brash, and she rather liked it. It was a stray from the norm. She was sure that most women would have told him he was an asshole and walked away. It took guts to do what he did and he seemed easy doing it. There was definite chemistry with him that she didn’t understand. It was much deeper than a simple crush. Something about him stirred her deeper than a physical attraction.

         She looked over at Matt; he was already asleep, blond hair falling handsomely over his tan brow. Boy but he was a handsome man, great body, perfect teeth, what every successful girl would ever want. Why didn’t she feel that he was? They’d met through a friend’s party, she thought he was totally out of her league and he thought she was too wild for him. When she saw him she was in the middle of letting her friend Lena lick tequila out of her navel, messing with the minds of the few young men that were there. The minute he walked through the door she had wanted to meet him, maybe take a chance at even a one night stand to tell the gang. Those were wild times, she’d been everywhere and done everything; rock concerts, all night binges, frat parties, dares, double dog dares, mini skirts, crop tops and even a small tattoo she got because she lost a bet. She instinctively moved her hand to touch the stained skin on left side of her lower back. She did not have to look to remember it, or how much it had hurt, or the vivid colors. It was a small likeness of a ripened peach with her name in flowing script through the middle. The original bet was for a very crude comment to be inked permanently in her skin. Lena had argued for her knowing it would be with her for the rest of her life, and she had thanked her profusely.

         She knew Matt was perfect the moment she saw him, and he was; too perfect. She found herself searching for flaws more and more now. Was it because they lived together, because they were close to the wedding? She shook her head; she’d never sleep at this rate. At least tomorrow was Friday, she would have the weekend away from work and Matt was leaving on business. She would have a whole week to figure out what to do about her feelings, what to do with herself and Matt. She loved him. She couldn’t help it; he just wasn’t what she thought she needed. She knew what she wanted but who really knew what they needed. She smiled at the intricacy of how close the two were linked. Wants and needs were so close to being the same thing but miles apart at the same time.

         She finally got up and quietly slipped out of the room to the balcony letting the cool night air flow over her naked body. She scanned the neatly manicured golf course their townhouse overlooked. She hated golf, such a pointless sport and yet a staple of the business world. She had skipped out on this years company outing just to get some planning done on the wedding. Matt, being the golf addict he was took her place and seemed to have a good time just being there and hanging out with her boss Darrel. Now there was a piece of work. Darrel was the very profitable owner of a small software company that his father had built. She knew the business better than he did. Darrel was just a figure head, she did all the real work for him, going to meetings, reports, lunches, sales, did it all. He just sat in his office playing solitaire on his computer and occasionaly coming out to check on her ask her if she needed anything and ask a few stupid questions about what was going on.

          She never could understand how people survived in this world as clueless as most of them were. Darrel flaunted his money, wasted it on women and strip clubs, expensive cars that he managed to wreck or blew the engines before the warranty expired, called her in the middle of the night, drunk, wanting her to pick him up. His friends called the office wanting to know what the plans were for the weekend; he came in hung over and half-asleep most days. How she wished that she could get away with things like that. If she came in without make up he would nonchalantly mention that it wasn’t casual day and that all the other people in the office manage to put themselves together in the morning. She wouldn’t even have that job if she weren’t trying to hook up with Matt at the time. She was working as a bartender and making good money with a nice apartment and her freedom. Then she met Matt and everything changed. He changed the way she dressed, acted, talked, and worked. She was a round peg in the square hole of his life.

         What could she do to make her life more interesting without changing what she had now? She liked Matt, but did she really love him, real love? Was he really what she wanted to be with the rest of her life? Didn’t she want what she had, the money, the status, the reliability of knowing what tomorrow held? She knew she would never find the answers to her questions, especially with Matt. She knew there was more to life than what you drove and how much money you made. Blame her simple up bringing but she just didn’t think that she could live this way, not now, not ever. Her mind was reeling with questions and doubts. The clock through the window read almost midnight. She walked back in and picked up the phone dialing the bar where Lena worked on her way back out.

          “Whiskey Well,” her friends no nonsense husky voice yelled to the phone to be heard over the crowd.

          “Lena.”

          “Hey Peach, what’s up?”

         She smiled at her friend’s pet name for her. “Can’t sleep.”

          “Come do some shooters with me, it’ll knock you out light weight,” she teased.

         Georgia could hear the loud clink of glasses and bottles in the background and knew the place was packed.

          “Am I doing the right thing?”

          “Oh no. We’ve already had the cold feet talk.”

          “I think I’m close to frost bit.”

         Lena giggled and thanked a customer for a tip. “Babe, you need to do what you think is right. If you didn’t think it was right then why did you say yes?”

          “Oh, you know how I am with Matt, I can’t say no.”

          “This is an infatuation gone all wrong isn’t it?”

          “No,” Georgia sighed.

          “Then why are we talking?”

         She smiled, Lena was blunt and to the point and that’s what she loved, she cut through the bullshit right to the stink. “You’re right. You know this is why I love you right?”

          “Is there any doubt. Love you babe. Go to sleep,” and with that she hung up the phone.

         Georgia turned and leaned her back against the railing. She could hear cars passing on the roads that surrounded the area. There were a few stars out, and if she concentrated, she could hear the smooth even breathing of Matt in the bed. She padded back into the room and rested her shoulder against the door jam. Matt lay on his stomach with his head turned facing her. His well-toned arm tucked under the pillow the moon light reflecting off the perfect definition of his triceps. Was it just the physical attraction? He was a beautiful man, women threw themselves at him. There was confidence there but also a bit of arrogance, and not the good kind. There were times that he seemed to care more about her than himself, but they were rare. He was mostly self-concerned but it seemed the whole world was turning that way. She wondered sometimes if it wasn’t the fact that he had put so much work into making her who she was now, that she felt she was obligated to stay. Granted she didn’t have a whole lot when they met but she was happy. She had a roof over her head, a bed to sleep in, faithful friends and a less faithful truck, but it ran and got her from place to place when it wanted to. She was constantly doing something to it. Two summers before she met Matt she’d installed a three-inch body lift and changed the tires out to thirty-threes and there was always fine-tuning, but that’s why she loved the truck, it was hers and she knew it inside and out.

         She sighed. “What am I going to do?” she whispered. Matt shifted in his sleep and the sheet pulled further down exposing his muscular tan back. She raised an eyebrow. “I may be confused but I know a hot man when I see one,” she heard the dreamy tone to her voice and knew she wasn’t seeing Matt, she was seeing a finely sculpted male body. She wondered if the man she met earlier that night had a body like his, when she hugged him he felt solid and strong. She glanced at her purse hanging on the foot of the bed and could clearly see in her mind the business card she had tucked into a hidden pocket. Chance Parker. He was almost the complete opposite of Matt, not the tall lithe athletic type, but dark and stocky. He seemed athletic enough though, strong enough to hold his own in bed she bet. She wondered what his strong rough hands would feel like against her skin, if his lips were really as soft as they looked. She felt a ripple course through her body that ended deep in her belly and spread heat through her. She walked toward the bed leaving the balcony doors open. She softly put a hand on Matt’s shoulder and was shocked at how warm his skin felt against her palm. Her fingers traced the fine muscles and she leaned down and kissed his shoulder gently.

          “Georgia?” he asked sleepily, turning over on his side.

         He looked confused, half-asleep and completely vulnerable. She slid slowly under the covers next to him and pressed her body against his. She felt his body react almost instantly and it urged her even more. She rolled him onto his back capturing his mouth for a passion filled open mouth kiss. Her eyes closed. She could vividly see Chance there, golden brown eyes hidden behind his thick dark lashes. She broke the kiss and softly flicked her tongue down his neck trembling as she heard him groan deep in his chest. Guilt flickered through her briefly, she almost felt like she was cheating but the feeling was so incredible. A lustful passion awakened that had been dead for years. Her hand traveled between them grazing against his finely chiseled stomach to find his erection and in one swift move she covered him moaning as he entered her. She felt him starting to wake up. He gripped at her rear moving her slowly in a sleepy rhythm that was lazy and urgent. His breath was hot against her shoulder and she could feel his teeth nip at her skin picturing in her mind Chance’s dark skin against hers, his rough hands pulling at her hips. She let a small moan escape as Matt pushed her harder against his stomach rubbing her roughly grinding their bodies together his breathing growing faster.

          “Laura,” she heard him whisper. His hands tangled in her hair and pulled her down to his mouth thrusting his tongue inside. Did she just hear what she thought she heard? He rolled her onto her back thrusting harder she couldn’t help but enjoy, she turned her thoughts back to her own fantasy imaging dark hair and rough hands, soft lips against her skin and hot breath in her ear. The pace was reaching a fever and she finally released arching her back and shivered in his arms as he swelled inside her. He gripped her tight, she heard his breathing break in her ear and ran her nails down his back as he released. When his breathing evened out and he came to rest with his head on her shoulder she stroked his hair and whispered, “Who’s Laura?” She felt him tense slightly and he rolled to his back. “I’m not mad. Just curious. I mean if sex is going to be like that all the time I’ll be Laura,” she said jokingly. “Come on Matt.”

          “She’s just a girl I met,” he said after a deep breath.

          “Did you sleep with her?”

          “No.”

          “Do you want to?” she asked even though it seemed to her it was pretty obvious.
          “I don’t know.”

          “I think you do.” She lay down next to him and brushed his pale hair off his brow and softly ran her hand down the side of his face. “Are you having second thoughts?” His bright blue eyes came open and looked right at her.

          “I love you,” he said softly.

         She smiled slowly and kissed him gently. “You are, aren’t you?”

          “I don’t know, Georgia.” He pulled her hand from his face and held it in his own. “Things are getting closer, sometimes I wonder if we really are doing it right.”

          “Matthew,” she said sliding on top of him to meet him face to face, “if you are not happy don’t let me be the reason you stay. Maybe we need to rethink things. It’s only been two years. I do love you very much, enough that if things don’t work out its okay.” She kissed him softly on the lips barely touching. “I’ve doubted too.”

          “I know you have. I can see it in your eyes some days, especially tonight, you get this wild flight or fight look about you.”

          “Do you think we’re too different?”

          “Sometimes.”

          “I hate my job.”

          “I know you do.”

          “I hate Darrel.”

          “I know.”

          “Laura works on the Chicago sales team doesn’t she?”

          “Hmm?”

         She knew she caught him off guard but it had just clicked. “Laura. She’s the petite little black haired thing that runs sales in Chicago. Always perfect, never a hair out of place always has the trendy clothes. I’ve met her.” She stared him down and his eyes were beginning to give him away. She wasn’t seeing what she thought was a small infatuation, this had substance to it. “You’ve slept with her haven’t you?” She felt her voice drop and hardly heard the words come out of her mouth. He didn’t say anything but held her stare. “You have. I can see it, Matt.” She slowly pushed herself off him and sat on the side of the bed. “You know I thought I was going to be the one that backed out, or messed up, or cheated not you. I guess you can hide it better than I can huh?”

          “Georgia,” he said softly.

          “How long?”

          “Georg-“

          “How long Matt?” she raised her voice, not in anger but to interrupt him. “How long have you been fucking her?” She turned to face him.

         He didn’t answer her. She wasn’t crying and she couldn’t. How could she when she was looking for a way out and here it was slapping her in the face. “Listen,” she finally said taking his hand, “we both want out,” she said tracing his long fingers as they curved around her thumb. “I’ve wanted out for a long time and haven’t been able to figure out how without hurting you.” She raised her eyes to meet his, “It’s time.”

         They didn’t say much the next morning before Matt left for the airport. A slight smirk tugged at her mouth when she recalled he was going to Chicago.

         He had asked him why he had to leave on a Friday. Now she knew. It had nothing to do with customer relations and business dinners. It was about sex; sex with a prissy, stuck up sales manager. She laughed and shook her head. She wasn’t sure if she should feel guilty for feeling relief, then again she really didn’t care. She felt rested and refreshed. After everything had been said last night she had slept on the balcony. The night had been cool and moist but soothing and she slept deeply.

         After Matt left she got to packing the few things she wanted. The majority was his. He’d spent thousands equipping the town home with anything that had a designer label, what ever it took to impress; all of her furniture and décor was sold when they moved in together. There were a few pictures of her and Lena together she took, all her clothes, even the pieces Matt never wanted her to wear but she couldn’t part with, now she was glad she kept them. She pulled on a ripped pair of faded jeans and an old Poison concert tee Lena had bought for her. She’d already called the office and told Darrel she wouldn’t be in. She hadn’t given him time to protest but hung up and left the receiver off the hook. He’d spend the day rooting through her desk trying to find things she might be hiding from him. He wasn’t discreet about it either, she’d return to a mess. She’d given up confronting him about it. If she wanted things kept away from him she took them home, she couldn’t keep anything personal there, she didn’t even keep pictures on her desk, made sure her mugs came home at night and locked what she could up. She felt completely disgusted with the professional world. Hell, she had worked in a bar for four years and never felt she had to lock anything up. She trusted everyone and never felt she needed to keep secrets.

         She looked around the town home wiping her hands on her jeans. Everything she owned was packed into her Jetta. The place still looked lived in, maybe that’s why she didn’t feel as if this was such a huge change. Had the place been cleaned out and empty maybe she would have felt more emotion, but she doubted it. The relationship had been over for along time. They were both just too scared to say it.

          She checked all the rooms again making sure everything she cared about was gone then locked the door behind her and put the key on top of the doorframe. She turned to start toward her car and stopped. The day was warm and breezy, a mild summer day with cotton candy clouds. Yes, she thought pushing stray strands of hair away from her face, today is a good day.