If I Only...

if i only had a cow

i would give it to my neighbor

if i only had a loo

i would have to wait and see;

if i only had a friend

i would give them all my heart

if i only had a friend

who wanted me.



if i only had a goldfish

i would put it in my sandwich

if i only had a towel

i would look a mite apalled;

if i only had a job

i would use it to pay my phone bill

and i'm sure i'd have a phone bill

if i got any calls.



if i only had a salad

i would feed it to my tortoise

if you gave me a flower

i would put it in my hair;

if i only had a voice

you would know that i was crying

and if i was of any worth

then maybe you would care.



if i only had some cyanide

i would end my useless days

i would stand there on your porch

i would mar your flawless lawn



maybe if i was beautiful

if i had anything of worth

you might miss me in my absence

you might notice i was gone.