How I Made Myself a Coffee

How I Made Myself a Coffee
(based on a true story)

It was one of those moments when I fancied a nice hot sweet cup of coffee. The procedure is certainly not a difficult one – you put the kettle on (if you haven’t got one just put some water in a pot as I do), prepare a nice cup with a saucer and a little teaspoon, put two or one and a half teaspoons of coffee in and wait for those necessary hundred degrees to be reached inside. Complete the action with pouring in the water and stirring. I mustn’t forget two lumps or teaspoons of sugar - I like it sweet you see. The tasting part is the best – oh, do not forget to place yourself on a comfortable sofa with a few biscuits ready to be eaten. Sip and… urgh! It’s horrible! Oh ho! What coffee is it? Where did I buy it? It’s undrinkable. I must make a new one. At least I have several kinds of my favourite drink at home, so let’s make a traditional one now.
Here we are again, a nicely steaming pot, the Tv on (I like watching a bit of news or a film while drinking). I take a sip…Oh my God! It’s salty! Unbelievable! I must have mistaken salt for sugar ! Never mind, now I’ll make an excellent coffee!
The water is boiling, sugar is prepared (I read the label twice), pouring procedure finished, stirring… a moment of carelessness and the drink is on the wall. Damn! Am I going to have a coffee today? I’ll die for a cup of coffee. I must do it again, no matter what, I’d surely die if I don’t have it until the sun sets!
So I am putting the pot on for the fourth and hopefully final time. This time it takes fifteen long minutes to complete the action of stirring, replacing myself slowly but steadily into the living room (I’m hopeless at carrying things so I just do these snail steps). By the time I sit down the coffee must be nearly cold, you say. No, it probably didn’t take so long because I sat and enjoyed what I had been longing for for the last half an hour.
Oh, the sweet taste of coffee at last!
Next time when you pop in I’ll show you the coffee stains on my kitchen wall.