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Rated: 18+ · Other · Other · #1125912
this is a story i'm writing for a contest and really could use some feedback.
The steamy silence of the summer night closed in all around her. The woods were dark and thick with fog brewed from the heat and fresh rain. She sat alone on her front porch, indulging in the sweet smell of jasmine permeating from her garden.
Summer nights were always the best. Chloe had seen many nights in many places and all paled in comparison to a summer night in western Washington state. The Olympic mountains called to her heart and finally she was home. Home. The word had such a sweet sound to her. She closed her eyes and breathed the clean, fragant air in deeply, filling her lungs.
The quiet peace of the mountain side was suddenly shattered by the unnatural sound of the telephone.
"Perfect timing," Chloe muttered sarcastically as she made her way to the kitchen, "Hello?"
"Hola Chica!!" A very cheerful, squeaky voice replied in sing-song.
"Well, hello my little pixie. How are you?" Chloe teased her dear friend, Alyssa.
"I'm fabulous as ususal. And your super-creepy, cabin in the woods adventure; how is that going?"
"Swimmingly, darling," Chloe made a poor attempt at a british accent, "No, seriously, I'm loving this."
"Chloe, if you tell me everything's okay, I won't worry. But you know..." Alyssa began, but was cut short.
"Don't worry. This time I really think, I'm okay." Chloe interrupted.
"Yeah, I know, but last time you said that you know what happened."
"You're right! I do know what I said and what happened! I was there!" Chloe snapped. The phone was silent for a while.
" Alright then. Excuse me for giving a crap. I'll leave you to your bears and mountain lions." Alyssa said in the tight lipped I-hope-you-can-tell-I'm-mad voice she used when she was hurt.
"I appreciate that you are concerned. But you don't need to worry. You need to study. Mr. Callaghan's pysch. final is no joke. I love you. You're my best friend, please don't be mad."
"Okay. Promise you'll call if anything happens. If you get lonely or run out of toilet paper, anything, you call me, okay."
"I promise, mom." Chloe chuckled.
"Hey don't be smart." Alyssa giggled.
"Call me tomorrow and let me know how the test goes."
"I will. Bye!"
"Bye-Bye." Chloe hung up the phone and decided to raid the fridge. She had stocked up on Ben & Jerry's this morning at the market. Blankly she stared at the ice cream, "cherry garcia, no, uh...chunky munky...shit... I thought i got, yep there it is the utimate, half-baked." She muttered to herself, pulling it free of the other tasty yet inferior flavors.
Now armed with a spoon and a pint she abandoned the sanctuary of the porch for the comfort of the living room sofa and distraction of the television.




* * * * *


It was the smell. A horrid, wretched smell of death and decay, a smell Chloe was very familiar with. That was what woke her. Sharp flashes of pain twisted and contored her body as she tried to move. She could not open her eyes. Her hands, bound behind her back, were tightly restrained. Her eyes, why couldn't she see, why wouldn't they open? She felt a cold, thick wetness beneath her body. She bagan to panic. Stricken with terror she pleaded silently, "Open, please, open, OPEN!" But her eyes were swollen shut.
"Hello? Is anyone there?" Chloe whispered.
"HELLO! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?" Chloe was screaming now. Blind and bound, she cried and screamed for an eternity and no one answered. She couldn't hear anything except the faint sound of running water somewhere underneath the floor where she lay.
"Calm, calm down, Chloe. Breathe, do not panic." Chloe was trying to talk herself back to sanity. After a little coaxing and some deep breaths, she managed to calm down enough to survey her situation.
"Okay, my eyes..." She began to cry again, "Stop it! Calm down!" She yelled at herself. Calm... she thought of Alyssa, her dearest friend. Alyssa was a fighter, she would get out of this. She would think it through and get out.
"Alright, no eyes, no hands...wait my voice, it's echoing.." She rolled slightly and touched the floor with her fingertips, "it's concrete." The sticky wet substance she lay in was pooled around her. She took a deep breath and as the putrid copper scent invaded her lungs she wretched. Chloe stifled the vomit and swallowed hard.
"So it must be a garage, or a storage shed, something. The floor is covered in blood," she deduced through the silent sobs she refused to set free, "where am I? Can I stand?" She couldn't believe she hadn't thought of trying to stand up yet. She tried to sit up but the pain in her sides was horrific.
"Broken ribs," she said, "Shit!" She strained her whole body, every ounce of energy she could call to arms and got no reaction, no sensation below her waist at all.
"Fuck!" The screams and tears began again as Chloe lost all control.


1

The woods were bright and sunny. Everything was in bloom from the cherry and apple trees to the trilliums and berry bushes. As Alyssa drove up the mountain side she began to understand why Chloe had ran here. It was so beautiful. She silenced Madonna's "Like a Virgin" on the cd player and picked up her cell phone. She dialed the cabin and it rang and rang until finally Chloe's voice chimed in to say that she was not available at the moment and to leave a message. Alyssa hung up halfway through the voice mail message. It had been four days and Chloe had not answered or returned any of her calls. Alyssa pushed her foot down on the gas. She was certain something had happened to her friend. She had said she wanted privacy, but privacy did not include not talking to Alyssa. They had shared every private moment with eachother since the first grade. Even when Chloe's depression over her mothers death had forced Chloe to the brink of suicide, Alyssa had been there to fish the pills from her mouth. She had gagged Chloe and made her vomit with her own fingers. Lost in her thoughts and worry Alyssa narrowly missed the gravel road that led to the cabin, her tires angrily spit rocks as she made a hard left. Her Pathfinder lost it's grip in the thick, soft gravel and Alyssa pounded the brake coming to a stop precariously on the edge of a cliff.
"Jesus Christ! You've got to be kidding me." She said loudly to no one and lit up one of the Newport 100's she claimed to be her only link to sanity. As she stood there staring at her car about to burst into hysterics alone on a gravel road somewhere above two thousand feet on the easternmost side of Mt. Rainier, she silenced her mind and strained her ears. She could hear a vehicle approaching. She walked out to the beginning of the gravel road, positioned herself behind a tree and watched to see who would be all the way up here. The cabin was the only form of civilization up here. The road leading to it, the ground it sat on all privately owned by Chloe and her family. It was the only private land left on the mountain. The rest had been seized and turned into picnic areas by the hippie activists who believed that no one could own a mountain. But by agreeing to rent it out as a hunting cabin in the fall months her family had managed to keep it.
She heard the vehicle slow down and make the turn, as it came slowly around the hairpin corner where Alyssa had lost control of her SUV, she saw that it was a park ranger. Immediate relief washed over her and she jumped out from behind her tree causing the ranger to slam on his brakes coming to an abrupt halt inched from the very pretty, but very frazzled looking young woman. He stepped out of his pick-up truck and approached Alyssa carefully.
"Are you alright, miss?" He asked with a serious look.
"Yes, I'm fine. My truck it's up there, I lost control on the gravel. I don't think it's broke down or anything it just shook me up."
"Well, then let's go take a look-see," the ranger headed in the direction of the Pathfinder, "so whatcha doin' all the way up here?" He asked with a thick southern accent. Alyssa deduced that he must have been a mountain local.
"Uh, my friend, Chloe Anders is staying in her families cabin just a few miles up the road."
"Oh, yeah, the Anders lodge. Yep, I know Chloe, very sweet girl. I was actually coming to check up on her. I like to stop in at least once a week, seeing as she is the only person for a quite a few miles. I worry about her."
"Have you talked to her in the last couple of days?" Alyssa asked as they approached her vehicle.
"As a matter of fact, no I haven't. I tried to call her last night and she didn't answer, so I made my way up here just to check. Better safe than sorry." The ranger opened the door to the SUV and climbed into the drivers seat. He turned the key in the ignition and started it right up. Then he backed it up several feet from the edge of the cliff and turned it around pointing it toward the cabin. He hopped out of the Pathfinder and handed the keys to Alyssa.
"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name?" Alyssa asked all of a sudden realizing what a attractive man he was. He had jet black hair and an amazing set of sky blue eyes. He was well built and obviously worked out. His facial features were as chisled and as perfect as the rest of his body and suddenly Alyssa felt very flirtatious. But she pushed the thought aside and opened the door of her truck. She had to find out what was going on with Chloe.
"I'm Adam, uh," he paused under the weight of Alyssa's stare, "Adam Taylor. And you are?"
"Alyssa Elliott."
"Well, Alyssa Elliott by the tire tracks in this gravel you seem to be in quite the hurry. Why is that?"
"I haven't been able to get ahold of Chloe in four days. She isn't answering her phone and hasn't returned my calls."
"And you find this strange enough to come all the way out here from UW." He said as he noticed the parking permit hanging from her rearview mirror.
"Chloe and I have been best friends since the first grade, she wouldn't just ignore my calls like this. I know something is wrong." Alyssa said as she started the truck.
"Well, how's about I follow you out. If something has happened I wouldn't want you wondering around out there by yourself."
"Sounds good." Alyssa watched him dissapear around the corner and waited until his pick up appeared behind her. Slowly and carefully she drove toward the cabin.


From the outside the cabin looked as if no one was home. The silence was so thick Alyssa felt as if the woods themselves were warning her to stay away. Silently she thanked the heavens for her near tragic accident and the arrival of the park ranger.
"Looks like nobodies home," Adam said as he got out of his truck. Alyssa was already walking to the front door, "Miss Elliott, slow down. Let me go first, you don't know what you're going to find in there." He jogged to catch up with her. There was a small round wicker table with two matching chais on the front porch. Alyssa stared at something on the table.
"What is it?" He asked as he came up behind her. On the table sat a half full glass of white zinfandel, Chloe's favorite for taking the edge off. The wine had a thick layer of fruit flies and gnats floating on the top and obviously hadn't been touched in days.
"That's strange. Chloe would not just leave this glass here to collect bugs. She is a known obsessive clean freak." Alyssa touched the glass.
"Don't touch anything!" Adam said so abruptly that Alyssa jumped knocking the glass over shattering it at spraying the contents all over her sandled feet.
"Shit!" She exclaimed.
"Oh man, I'm so sorry, Miss Elliott." Adam apologized as he knelt down to pick the insect carcasses from Alyssa's feet.
"It's okay," she said as she knelt down as well, "I want to go inside." They both stood and went to the door hestiantly. Ranger Adam turned the knob and pushed the door open. It opened easily and he stepped in with Alyssa behind him, pressed against his back as if his body would shield her from whatever awaited them inside the cabin. It was pitch dark, all the curtains were pulled and the smell of rotten food and sour milk almost knocked them both over. They entered into the hallway that ran the length of the cabin from the front door to the back door. To the left was the kitchen and dining area, and to the right was the living room and bedroom. Without a word Adam headed to the left toward the kitchen and the smell. Alyssa lingered behind searching for the string that hung from the ceiling fan in the hallway. She finally found it, closed her eyes and pulled. She felt the light flood in around her and after a quick prayer she opened her eyes. The scene around was like something in the latest Christopher Rice book she had just read. Her breath caught and she could feel the vomit rise in her throat. Choking back the bile, she heard someone far away calling her name.
"Jesus, oh Jesus! Miss Elliott! Are you alright?" Adam was next her, his hand on her back in an attempt to steady her.
"I'm, I don't know. Where is Chloe!" Suddenly Alyssa was like a raving lunatic running through the cabin and screaming, "Chloe! Chloe!" Tears ran savagly down her cheeks as she sifted through the debris that used to be her best friends refuge. As if she had exhausted her hysertia she fell to the floor in Chloe's bedroom, finally silencing her screams.
Adam entered the room and found Alyssa sitting indian style on the floor amidst a slew of pictures, papers, and broken ceramic fairies and unicorns. She held an envelope in her hand. Without even so much as blinking she just sat there staring off into whatever refuge her mind had taken her too. She didn't speak, she didn't move, she only held the envelope out as if waiting for someone to come and take it. Slowly and carefully Adam approached her and took the envelope out of her hand. It was addressed to "whom it may concern". He turned the envelope over and saw that it wasn't sealed. He emptied the contents out on the floor in front of Alyssa. There was a polaroid picture and a letter written on regular white printer paper. He hesitated staring at the picture and the note not knowing which if any to investigate first. After some mental deliberation and no response from his companion he decide to read the letter. But first things first. Ranger Adam left the cabin and went outside to his pick up truck. He picked up his radio and called the station.
"Go ahead Adam, this is Deb." A static filled voice announced over the CB.
"We're gonna need to call the sherriff out to the Anders cabin." Adam said as calmly as he could.
"Chloe's place? What happened, Adam." Deb, the dispatch girl asked responding to the shakiness in Adam's voice.
"I think she's been murdered." Without waiting for a response he threw the radio on the seat and walked to the porch. He sat in one of the wicker chairs and unfolded the note.

"I am a man. Only a man, misunderstood and overly idealized by the media. They call me a sadist, a cold-blooded killer and a psychopath. I am none of these things. I merely seek perfection. None of the women I have chosen could appreciate the love and care I have provided for them. Unappreciative women deserve to be punished. So I took it upon myself to punish them.
I will not tolerate anymore falsifications from the police and the press. My search for the perfect woman is not some psycho endeavor induced by my childhood. I was never molested or raped or abused. My parents did not abandon me and thrust me into an early life of crime. I do not hear voices and God has not told me to punish these women for their sins. I do not worship the devil or use women as sacrifices. I am simply looking for a woman who deserves me and the kind of love only I know how to give.
Chloe Anders is no longer with us and if there is a question as to where I have hidden the body it will be answered if and only if this letter is printed in all the major publications along the west coast. So hop to it, and save dear Chloe's eyes from being eaten by the worms and bugs, for they are particularly beautiful eyes."

The letter had not been signed but it had been hand written and obviously delivered to the cabin after this nutjob had abducted Chloe. The handwriting did not appear to be a man's. It was too... pretty. Adam had an idea who had written it, but the only person who could confirm it was in shock rocking back and forth on the floor in a dead girl's room. He sat there on the porch waiting for the sherriff, unsure of how to approach Alyssa with this new information. Information that confirmed that her best friend had been murdered and most likely tortured by a self righteous looney. Adam had never encountered anything like this before. He had seen dead bodies, hikers who lost their way in the dense forests of the mountain. People mauled by bears or mountain lions were rare occurences but far more likely than abduction and murder at the hands of a serial killer. Out here on the mountain, the weather and the wild could easily take a life, but this was something out of a horror movie and he wasn't sure he wanted to be involved even as much as he already was. But he was a sucker for a pretty girl and had followed one knee deep into this shit. He wished he could just get in his truck and drive away never to return.
Adam stood took a deep breath and went back into the cabin. He walked back toward the bedroom to find Alyssa. She was still sitting on the floor right where she had been, but the polaroid picture that had come with the letter was in her lap rather than on the floor where he had left it. Curiosity got the best of him and he picked up the picture. Chloe lay on her couch, a sleeping beauty, in nothing more than a t-shirt and panties. She looked so peaceful and serene, like an angel. He was surprised and unsure of what to assume this picture meant. He had expected to see her corpse, mangled and bloody. Instead he saw a beautiful young woman, in her early twenties. She lay on her side, facing the television, her long mass of curly brunette locks was slung over the arm of the couch and almost touched the floor. Her skin appeared flawless, just then Ranger Adam had a revelation. The killer was trying to show how perfect she was, he wanted people to identify with him, to understand why he had chosen her. But why had he decided to speak out now? In the past seven months, at least six girls had gone missing in the Olympia area, but that was more than two hours from the mountain. Adam knew of three bodies that had been found, and that the Thurston County Sheriff's office believed them to be connected. All three girls had been bound at the wrists and ankles. All had been beaten, had broken ribs. They had also all been given an epideral which is what they give mothers to take the pain from a vaginal birth. It is administered through a cathider into the spine and literally paralyzes a person from the waist down. When his nephew was born his sister had said she couldn't feel her legs at all. They were all exceptionatly beautiful, talented, well to do women from upstanding families. All in their early twenties. Their stories were all over the news and the ranger station had recieved flyers and full reports on each girl. This was a huge deal, Adam knew he had to call the police.
"Miss Elliott, I really need to call the Deputy to come on out and have a look-see. He wouldn't be too happy to find us sitting here in the middle of all the evidence. Would you wanna come outside with me and radio the station? The fresh air might help," he waited several minutes for a response, "Miss Elliott?"
"I need a cigarette." She said it simply and matter of factly, then she stood and walked out of the room. Adam stuffed the picture and the letter back into the envelope, folded it in half once and then shoved it into his pocket.
He found Alyssa outside, leaning against her Pathfinder staring into the woods and puffing madly away at her cigarette.
"This may not bee the time to tell you, but those things will kill you." He said as he walked past her to his truck.
"You're right, now is not the time." She growled. "Where is the letter?"
"What?" He asked, digging around for his radio.
"The letter, the one in the envelope that was in Chloe's room. Where is it? I want to read it." Her tone was flat and unpleasant.
"It's here in my pocket." He took it out and handed it to her.
"Could you maybe just wait a couple of minutes of that?" She pointed to his radio as she took the letter and walked to the wicker table with a fresh cigarette. Adam was silent and just stared at her with his radio in his hand.
"This guy is a fucking nut." She spat as she threw the letter to the ground.
"Chloe is dead. But the sooner the deputy gets here, the sooner we can get this published and find out where her body is." Adam felt as if he had time to think this out and was confident in his choice to involve the authorities. He knelt down a picked up the letter. After all it wasn't really a choice, but more like a duty.
"I think he's full of shit. I don't think he killed her at all. He's got her tied up somewhere, raping her and fucking with her head." Alyssa's whole demeanor had changed. She seemed to be speaking to herself and not to Adam.
"What? Why would he go throught the trouble of the letter. He wants to be heard, he wants to be idolized for what he is doing." Adam had already worked the whole scenario through, made his conclusions and intended to get out of this as soon as possible. He wanted no part of it. "No, you're wrong. Why would he go through the trouble of abducting her. He had to be watching her, studying her. He says he's looking for the perfect woman and Chloe is obviously not the first one he's found. He stalks his victims and if he believes he is in love with her, he wouldn't just kill her in four days. He would work for it and try to convince her that she loves him too. No, Chloe's not dead. This is just something to keep the authorities from looking for her. They will all be busy trying to get this load of bullshit printed." Alyssa finished her cigarette, flicked it off into the woods and stepped down from the porch.
"And there's something else..." She said pointing to the letter in his hand. "What is that?" He asked waiting for an earlier suspision to be confirmed. "Chloe wrote that letter." She said matter of factly.





2
By the time the deputy arrived dusk was falling coola nd calm across the mountainside. Tired, hungry and utterly pissed off the two sat on the porch, waiting for the round and quite greasy looking so called deputy to pry himself from his jeep. Alyssa almost laughed out loud at first glance of Deputy Dick. He was a large fat man with no hair to speak of on his head and a thin black hitler mustache on his lip that resembled a line of dirt. He had a box of donuts on the passenger seat next to him and stereotypically shoved one into his mouth before he approached the cabin.
"Well, well. It's about time you showed up. I mean I know your a busy man and all, but we have a slight situation up here." Adam said sarcastically, taunting the fat deputy.
"I'm aware of the so called situation, Ranger." The deputy shot back his voice thick with disdain or the jelly from his snack, Alyssa wasn't sure which.
"I haven't the slightest why the department would send your chubby, useless ass up here. This is way over your head." Adam said leading the way to the cabin door. Alyssa just sat and listened. She had no intention of speaking until she was spoken to. Adam was right if appearances held any sway, this backwoods deputy looked as useless as the belt that desperately strained to hold up his trousers under the weight of his massive pot belly. They bickered throwing insinuated insults back and forth until their voices dissapeared into the back of the cabin. Alyssa was deep in thought working the situation through in her head. This was what she was good at. She could easily put herself into the mind of a psycho that was why she was studying criminal psychology. Adam had the letter and the picture and by the way he had reacted to Deputy Dick he had no intentions of giving it to him. She figured he would wait until for the FBI. But she had her own intentions. She had to get this letter from him and take it to Prof. Callaghan. He had been an FBI profiler for almost twenty years until he was shot in the chest and taken out of the field. Now he taught criminal psych. at the University of Washington. She was confident that between the two of them they could figure this out and find Chloe. But how would she convince this do-gooder ranger to give her such an important piece of evidence?



* * * * *

"These fucking newspapers!" He screamed as he threw the paper down on the floor where Chloe lay. She could hear him pacing the length of the room behind her. She had no idea of the time that had passed, she couldn't even tell if it was night or day. She wondered if anyone had figured out she was missing. She thought of Alyssa. Her dear was friend was where she had placed her faith.
"Ridiculous morons! Incapable, backward neanderthals!" He continued raving like this for a moment then knelt beside Chloe, taking her by the hair and lifting her face from the ground so he could look at her.
"What are you looking at? Are you surveying the damage you've done? Do you like what you see?" Chloe aked him in a voice fueled by pure hatred and disgust. In the time she had been captive she had been very defiant and uncooperative. She wanted to see how far she could push him and that had turned out to be quite farther than she had expected. He obviously had a purpose for her that she had not yet fullfilled.
"Do you think I won't kill you?" He asked, his hot, thick, putrid breath filling her nostrils.
"Go ahead then." She challenged.
"You're time will come." He said calmly and walked out of the room, taking his torch with him and leaving Chloe again in the darkness.







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