love can be a wrong choice..so marriage. |
I knew I was in love with that girl..Ashya Aftab......and Ibelieved it was true love.she was beautiful,charming and cute.There was something in her eyes that always lured me to the path she walked ,to the table she sat,to the class room she entered and the labs she experimentated.My friends told me it was love.Lovingly I accepted fate.I dispelled my fathers notion that true love is only a mills and boon kind of thing.or a holly wood fixture.It was all happening to me.I had started shaving twice and brushing my teeth thrice.I was even jelling my hair...I t was in mid eighties.I was a medical student and she had just migrated from another medical college.Including me,she had many victims .....very soon she was accepting the offers from other class mates.One day Zaheer gave her the lift in his newly bought Lancer while I i was only licking my wounds with my byke at workshop.I was drinking lassi from the hawker when i saw her with the group gentiles...all men ..my classfellows .....she was laughting and sharing jokes...to my dismay she entered a expensive resturant with them..sissies.,i hissed spitefully...I made efforts to look confident in her presence and i succeeded too sometimes..i think.....she smiled in return many times...one day i engaged in conversation with her...regarding religion and science....she opted for less digestable topic.....soap opera Dallas.again I wanted to take the trip to murree while she flagrantly denounced the offer and went ahead to trip to Abottabad.....by fall I knew my love was only onesided.I had many sleepless nights and even started buying sad songs.i saw sunflower....voyage and some tragic movies from india, identified with the dying Dillip Kumar in the end of the movie...i wanted to get drunk like Pran...indian villian...but It was Zia s regime and Alcohol was banned .....it was expensive too....i tried to write her name on my forearm but that seemed bloody painful.....i read othello....mayor of casterbridge and the great expecations.....indeed i sublimed to some degree...i diversify myself in literary and semi literary activities.... i read great expectations many times...and decided that Ayaha was as cruel as the heroine of the novel.......i even tried to identified with van goth......heart broken i used bright colors to splash across the cheap canvass.......I thought i was impressionist...my roomate had differnt version of my work......ugly ...he told me..abstract,... i decided........... It was our finals when one day when my cerebaral apparatus couldnt take the pressure... i wrote in one paper ...i love you aysha......and i gave to her........next day she approached me and said it was funny but she had not been allowed to believe in love without parents consent.........the whole personality of her eclipsed in front of me...aysha.....the glamousous and intellegent lady of medical collge is dependent for the parent concent for her love..............................?i asked her why..and she told me becuse she was engaged while very young .........that was our last dialogue.....i finshed exams....and then housejob...and then went to uk for post graduation.....when returned i strated for my surgery.......i never married...........i even sometimes recalled at my my crush at the medical campus....and wondered here aysha would be.....then i met her...............in the sea breeze of karachi she was as glamourous as i always visulized...she had two kids with her...i asked about her and she told me she was divorced.Her husband tortured her and she took divorce..... for a few days i tossed and turned and found my past and future both brighter...i took it as omen.....and went to her address........in the lawn i met Zaheer......my ex class fellow.....she told me that she was going to marry him.....this time it was her own choice. |