introspective and inter-personal musings |
Spend a lifetime trying to question every move, every thought everything I try to do Waste time and energy trying to prove, that I am worthy, that I matter Spend a lifetime trying to understand why I do what I do, evaluating each mood Waste a wealth of living holding on, to what has died and disappeared I’m worth to much I say to myself it’s time to live for real Friendships cracked and shaking from tensions unreleased Watching women lying to themselves and others ‘bout the fact that they are free I made up my mind a long time ago not to run that race Watching women fight for power in ways they refuse to see Death appears over and over again in the midst of what others call life Spirits broken and crushed, daily fodder for superstars reaching high I want to live for real and say the words that others hold The things that break the lure of power and falseness in hearts turned cold Spend a lifetime trying to get the approval of others in my life Reality check says they don’t care and time is passing me by Spend a lifetime trying to find a way to fit securely in Reality check says it’s not worth it the air I breathe is thin I’m worth too much I say to myself it’s time to live for real I watch the world shudder and shake from the very pit of it’s core The worth of life hardly registers as the powerful fight for more I watch mother’s cry and father’s weep as the truth is finally revealed The world is in trouble and nothing will change unless We begin to live for real Pain is the norm, violence is true and everything is okay Nothing else matters except what you feel and whatever happens today True laughter has died at the expense of respect and no one seems to care Say whatever you like do what you want even if it only instills fear The world is in trouble and nothing will change unless We begin to live for real What I see may be only a dream, what I hope for never realized But I’ll be damned if I won’t with all that I am try to create a better life I think I came here to earth for whatever it’s worth to speak truth in the midst of this hell To fight for a life that demands respect and births what fear tries to quell I’m worth too much I say to myself it’s time to live for real The visions I have I’m willing to share but not for you to destroy Say what you like do what you want but my victory will be for real It’s not just for me and that’s what you can’t see nor understand in your world You want to think and only believe I’m just a little black girl What I realize is what and who I am inside, the place you can never reach I’ve learned how to silence the lies and voices failure in me See those are the tricks that come with defeat and live through the actions of others But I have learned how to quickly discern who are true sisters and brothers Beyond the color of skin and pockets too thin for others to even imagine I see the same hope and dreams sick and tired of schemes 2xx Beyond the serenely coifed hair, suv’s, old model T’s sports cars with flair I see the same hope and dreams sick and tired of schemes 2xx They too have decided it’s time to live for real Beyond the food banks, and monthly donations, volunteer drives we see There are some people fighting to find the truth from inside who want to live real like me Beyond the charity balls, and social halls, networking events and casting calls Beyond booty shaking, and breast augmentation, and new facial creations There are some people fighting to find the truth from inside they want to live real like me Beyond PS2, whichever NBA works for you, the PGA tour and bling bling galore Beyond the favorite star, the wars from afar, the terror at home and abroad There are people like me desperate to see the truth from inside who want to live for real Why inside? Because that’s where lies hide 3xx Spend a lifetime trying to question every move, every thought everything I try to do Waste time and energy trying to prove, that I am worthy, that I matter Spend a lifetime trying to understand why I do what I do, evaluating each mood Waste a wealth of living holding on, to what has died and disappeared I’m worth to much I say to myself it’s time to live for real It’s time to live for real |