Bearing Up

June stood in the tiny narthex at the back of the church, peering down the long aisle at Jake, soon to become her husband. He was talking to his best man, Chuck, his mouth hidden by the side of his hand. Her mother left her side reluctantly, giving the shoulder of June’s satin gown one more pat and then relinquishing herself to the arm of the waiting usher. June’s father had on his calm, chairman-of-the-board smile, but he looked nervous too.

The rest of the large wedding party remained on the sidewalk outside the church, waiting for their cue. A few late arriving guests stood and chatted with them before leaving the balmy summer air for the stuffy church. A large man was talking to the ring bearer, who would otherwise have been getting into some mischief, his mother felt sure.

Things were going remarkably well, June thought, relaxing a little. A large wedding had not been her idea, and certainly not Jake’s either. Her mother had talked her into it, and by something akin to blackmail had gotten her way. If the couple wanted a luxury honeymoon, then they ought to have an elegant wedding as well. June’s mother had never had either, and June was her only child. June would just have to make the best of it.

At one minute till eleven, the wedding planner came up the steps with the ring bearer firmly in tow. “You know what to do now, right?” she asked the little boy.
Joshua nodded. “That man was telling me just now, so I remember,” he said.

“Good. There’s the music. It’s time to go. Don’t forget to walk slowly,” she said.

Joshua took twenty steps, then stopped. He turned to his right, raised one hand, fingers bent, and said, “Gr-r-r.”

The wedding planner’s eyes grew large.

He took another twenty steps, stopped, and turned to his left, repeating the gesture. “Gr-r-r,” he said.

The wedding planner ran frantically down the side aisle and through a nearly empty pew to reach him, but Joshua did not alter his course. With great composure, he continued to the front of the church where the groom stood doubled up with laughter.

So shocked were they all by this performance that the bridesmaids were late to enter. The bride’s father, who had stepped out for a quick cigarette and missed the strange episode, proudly extended his arm and gave June a wink. “All set?” he asked. She nodded mutely. This was it, the day she had longed for and dreaded. Now, if she could just relax and enjoy it! She put the ring bearer out of her mind and smiled back at her father.

The wedding planner raised the end of her long train and gave it a mighty snap so that it billowed and floated behind her. She had been warned, but still it caught her off guard and she almost stumbled. Her father steadied her and they reached the chancel safely. Her father gave her hand a tender squeeze and sat down.

June glowed. Her satin gown swirled perfectly as she turned to meet Jake.

The couple repeated their vows, June giving a nervous giggle when she forgot a word and had to repeat it. Then they knelt for the blessing. Jake had her hand in his, and the priest wrapped his stole around the two clasped hands and blessed them. In the middle of that solemn moment there was a muffled guffaw from the best man and a camera flashed nearby. The best man covered up his laugh with an imaginary sneeze, and the incident went unnoticed by the bride and groom.

The bells rang, the triumphal music played and the bride and groom came sweeping down the aisle looking flushed and happy. The bridesmaids crowded around them, hugging and shouting congratulations. In the few moments of relative inactivity as the guests filed out of the church to go to the reception, the best man came alongside. His camera in hand, he showed a picture to Jake, who burst out laughing. June craned to see the display, and then sucked in her breath. On the bottoms of Jake’s shoes, as he knelt beside her, was the word, formed out of masking tape, “Help!”

“And what was that thing with the ring bearer?” Jake asked, still laughing. Chuck shook his head in puzzlement. “I don’t know but it was crazy! Where is he, anyway?“

Jake looked around and, spotting the boy, walked over to him, June at his side. “What was that you were doing on the way down the aisle?” he asked.

Joshua smiled. “Didn’t I do it good?” He raised his hands again, like claws, and growled.

“What was it? “ Jake asked again.

Joshua looked confused. “I was being the ring bear.”

June stared at him a minute, then knelt down and hugged him. “You were the best ‘ring bear’ ever,” she said. Looking up at Jake she said, “I guess if Mother didn’t have a stroke from that, she’ll survive the rest of the day.”

“I guess it’s a good thing I didn’t give you this, then isn’t it?” Jake responded, pulling something from his pocket.

“Give me what?” June asked suspiciously.

Jake held out his hand, and in it was a big fake ring with a hole in the center and a tube and bulb attached. He squeezed the bulb and gave her a good squirt. “Chuck handed it to me before the service, said he couldn’t find the ring and would this do?”

June fended off the water with her hands and shrieked, then glared at him.

“Oh, oh,” said the big man standing near who witnessed the whole scene. “That ‘s not the last time you’ll see that look,” he laughed.

Any response they might have made was cut off by the bride’s mother, who approached them with open arms. “Thank you for having such a perfect wedding,” she exclaimed and kissed them both.