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My life day-by-day |
Well I wanted to start by saying, thank you for being interested enough to click on this work that I have started. I thought that my life would make a good book, and people find diaries interesting because you get insight into other people's 'world'. First I want to state some facts about myself(and things I believe), I'm fourteen years old and I'm gay. I have known I was gay since I was eleven. It didn't bother me, except when I realized Chirstianty didn't accept it, I began to wonder if the religion was right, but I believe in God, it doesn't have to be the Chirstian's God, I just believe God is merciful and accepts people for who they are not they're sexuality, I also believe God created homosexuals because he wanted them here, we don't have a choice we are just here (contrary to belief) to show there are different people in the world. When people say something prejudice or racist, I always wonder, why does God want different people? Why aren't we all the same? Why aren't we all Black, White, Chinese, Japenese etc, because I believe God wants us to learn how to interact with other people, but this is just me, you don't have to believe it. Well, I kind of got off track, so anyway its summer now, but I have decided to write some entries from the past and I will add some that are happening now. Well, here goes nothing! Saturday, March 18, 2006 Lonely again, of course. I really don't care though. I just bought you at Waldenbooks, and I have decided to tell you everything. I talked to someone on the internet, and I really fell in love with him.We talked on the internet and the phone all the time. He was much older and later, it came out that he was bi, and married. I didn't care though, then one day he said he was going away for a week, on a buissness trip. He had done this before, but there's a difference, he never came back to the chat room and he never talked to me on the phone. It pisses me off, it really makes me pissed at him, but I get my anger thorough Alanis Morrisette's You Oughta Know, but I don't think I'll ever get over it. October 13 was the last time I talked to him and look! I still can't get over him! Good God, I'm such a naive stupid idiotic dumbass. Sunday, March 19, 2006 Days like this really get me down, I'm irritated at all my friends, I just want to close my eyes and go away. Wedensday, March 22, 2006 Today we had a two-hour delay and yesterday we had school CANCELLED (Spring Break is coming and it snows!). It was really nice to have this day, except this kid next door, Brandon, he's so freaking annoying! He, if I decide not to answer the door (because I don't want to come outside, but he won't take no for an answer.) will climb through the window and won't listen to me, when I tell him to get the hell out! God he pisses me off, but my friend, Jessica is going out with him (what does she see in the 250 pound bastard?) Thursday, March 23, 2006 I feel like such a dumbass. Last week, (or the week before) we found cigarettes in our dryer, and my parents thought they were mine. Brandon who smokes, is who I think it was( stupid asshole!) I told Kody, and he repeated it in front of Jessica's parents! That stupid idiot, I'm so fricking pissed right now, you can't imagine! Why the hell did he repeat it! I know all kinds of shit about him (one, him and I have done 'things' and two, him and his BROTHER have done 'things', but I'm not supposed to know that, but I do, so he better watch it!), so I don't know what he was thinking. Friday, March 24, 2006 Today, Kody was saying about the Brandon deal, and I told him to shut his damn mouth about it. He said Jessica was mad at him and I was to blame for telling him! When I told (which it was the morning it happened) him, I was really pissed at Brandon, I had no one else to talk to so I told him. He should accept responsibility for his own actions, but he never has and never will I guess. I told Jessica about it and she said he never said that! That stupid liar! Friday, March 31, 2006 Today was awful. Brandon, my self obsessed friend Amy, and Jessica were here in my house, and when I wasn't in the room, Brandon got in my fridge and got eggs out and started COOKING eggs. In MY house. WITHOUT my permission. What kind of asshole goes through someone's food and gets eggs and cooks them? Oh, and here's something better! HE started not one! But TWO fires! Then he got a napkin on fire and threw it in our toilet. He then laughed and flicked his tongue at me which made me step back, and I was in my room at this point, and he SHUT my door. What pisses me off he apologized for being a prick yesterday and he does this. GRRR! I'm to angry to write more because I got more that has pissed me off today but you'll have to wait until I cool down. SD (Same Day) Okay, I have some more to tell you, my 'friends' Kody and Shad were talking about how gays have a choice to be gay (not true, I should know) but they kept arguing with me about and their opinions come from The Bible. I really hate that stupid book anymore, I just wish people quit being such bigots, and idiots and live their lives without some book to sway them one way or the other, don't you think that if God put you on this earth he'd want you to live life? I swear people really piss me off. Then Brandon's stupid pitbull, her names Teddy, it got in the house and started sniffing around (this dog I have seen it almost attack Jessica's dog before) and it started going toward my little dog, Stella. Oh, that dog had tried to kill Stella I would have gotten a knife out of my drawer and killed it! My mom got some lunchmeat out of the fridge and it started following her then, and she threw it outside. I FRICKING HATE BRANDON! I HATE HIM! Monday, April 3, 2006 I YELLED at Brandon right in his fricking face! HAH! The asshole deserved it! Thursday, April 6, 2006 God, I hate Brandon, he comes out, like he's the one wronged, and I feel sorry for him! GOD! Why am I so freaking weak, I forgave him and I'm kicking myself. I HATE HIM SO MUCH! |