Specters Rule

“Land Ho!” cried the lookout from atop the observation deck, as monkeys started running around to adjust the sails to slow their speed. “Captain”, “Yes Private.” “We have spotted a stretch of land that is about 1 mile in from our current position.” “Good, get the prisoner and boat ready for departure.” “Aye, aye, captain” The sailor then quickly runs down a set of stairs and orders some monkeys to ready the boat and turns towards the holding cells down in the galleys. “Get the prisoner and bring him on deck for departure sailor!” he yells down to the cell keeper, “Be sure to pack him with a days’ rations.”

David, having been just awakened by the cell keeper, was not quite prepared for what troubles lay ahead. He had been charged with the theft of nine snails from the mess hall. Snails are a delicacy to this rare species of sea faring monkeys from the far east, and David, who provided the snails, had not been paid. This particular group of sailors was well known for their crooked dealings with vendors, but David would’ve never imagined them to go as far as to charge him with stealing his own wares. “Get your paws moving thief!” said the cell keeper, “Let’s see who you can steal from in the land of Lemuria!” “Anything’s better than being stuck in this cell smelling your armpits! Don’t you ever wash?” retorts David. The cell keeper cautiously opens the cell door. “Don’t try any funny business thief! I’d hate to skin you before your big day out!” “Whatever parasite.” David mumbles. After applying shackles and handcuffs, the cell keeper gives David a backpack with his one-day’s rations. “This is it?” “Yep, good luck. I heard this land is inhabited by a pretty nasty group of sea lions that don’t take to well to outsiders.” “Great.” Replied David.

David was then taken up to the deck for departure. Monkey sailors were swooping in left and right to get one last look at him before he was shipped out. They commenced to spit and throw feces at him, it was quite apparent that they didn’t think kindly of him stealing back the snails. “Get in to the boat!” screamed the captain. “NO CLOTHES! NO CLOTHES!” shouted all the monkeys as he stepped aboard the tiny lifeboat. “Is it the crews’ wish to have this prisoner be exiled with out the comfort of clothes!” yelled the captain. “NO CLOTHES! NO CLOTHES!” replied the crew. “So be it!” answered the captain as he tore what meager dress David had off of him. “Have you any words before sailing to your icy death?” asked the captain to David. “May you all die a terrible death of a million demons!” shouted David. “Lower the raft!” screams the captain. Quickly the lifeboat is dropped like a stone in to the icy waters and David scrambles to take control of the paddles with both hands still cuffed. He slowly makes his way to the snowy shore while plotting his revenge if he ever sees the captain again.

After rowing for hours, using two hands on each paddle at a time, David finally reaches shore. It is dark now and not much can be seen around him save for the dull whiteness of the snow glistening in the half-moon light. He hurries to take his boat up and flip it for cover, while his teeth chatter uncontrollably the whole time. He crawls under the boat and begins a restless sleep with nothing but his fur to shield him from the frigidness of the night air. How did I get myself in to this, he thinks. Why did I listen to my wife when she said this was the only gainful employment available? I could’ve delivered milk or newspapers, anything but being a sea merchant. I shouldn’t have listened to the mean winch, she probably wanted me gone so she could cheat on me with that know it all Calvin the rat! That guy’s been nosing around in my business ever since I married Chloe. No matter, he’ll get his one-day. They all will. With that David was asleep with memories of Chloe holding him in his bed.

Bump-bump! “What-“ BUMP-BUMP! “Who’s there?” David asks as he is awakened by the sound on the bottom if the boat. “This is the Heranian Republican Army and you are in violation of our no trespassing law!” replied the wolf. “I was left here by a band of monkey pirates aboard the L.S.S Morning Fire.” “What have you in your pack?” asked the war beaten wolf. “I’ve one-days rations consisting of chocolate and barley.” exclaimed David. “I’ll be taking that.” “But what am I to eat?” “I suppose that barley will, ah, never mind, I’ll take that to.” Angered David pushes the wolf and slaps him in the head with his backpack. “I think not you stupid canine!”








With little food and less patience, David had about as much as it could take of this vile desolate land.

While being led by the troops of wolves, stinking and reeking of blood and ethanol, David the monkey protested loudly, "How can a society be over-run by such brutes?!" Having said that, a sharp blow to his head had accompanied which rendered him unconscious. Upon awakening, David realized that he had been stripped of all his personal effects and been incarcerated in an ice jail cell. His head throbbed, and his sides ached from the bruises on his stomach, caused undoubtedly by many kicks or punches.

While getting his eyes to refocus on his surroundings, he became amazed by the architecture of his environment. Everything was constructed of ice. The ceilings were hewn of ice but not so thick as to not let the light in. The doorways were intricately carved to depict strange animals being fought by falcons and bears. A virtual hieroglyph of what appeared to be a story of his captive’s history. Even more intriguing was the plumbing, latches, screws, and other items that would be typically made from metal, were also fashioned out of ice. Truly a remarkable venue for a truly remarkable circumstance.

After some time had passed, and after taking a much needed nap, a penguin had made his presence known by slamming the entrance door. "Have you any idea of what you were charged with good sir?” the overweight penguin asked. "Yes!” exclaimed David, "I didn't let a wolf pillage my sack of food!" "Oh it is far more than that sir!” retorted the penguin, "You have been charged with the highest crime in the land!" "And what, pray-tell, would that be?” asked David. "Stealing the crown jewels from King Amaranth!" "WHAT!! You must be nuts! I haven't ever been here before you putz! How could I even know where the jewels are? Further more, how am I to know that; A: that there is a king of this land and B: that he has crown jewels!” shouted David, "This is the biggest lie I have ever heard!" And with that, the penguin pulled out a blowgun from inside his sleek fur and blew a dart into David. "Your trial will be in 24 hours", said the penguin. "What? I'm not going to give you the---", David stammered as the sleeping drug quickly made its way through his body. "Lights out, criminal!” said the penguin as David fell to the floor and began a deep sleep.

As our faithful monkey came to, he noticed a drip of water forming just above him on the ceiling. Trickle, trickle... splat! "What?” David exclaimed. Apparently the whole cell of ice had begun to melt. The bars of ice that held him captive were now the size of toothpicks. Penguins were running around franticly here, there, and everywhere. Not one of them paid any attention to David. He tried hard to get one of them to stop and tell him what was going on, but none of them would. "HEY!” he shouted, "What is going on!" But to no avail. Just then with a huge crash a block of ice the size of a car fell in front of one of the other cells. KABOOM!! "HEY, SOMEBODY LET ME OUT OF HERE!!” screamed David. Finally one of the penguins came over out of breath and told David what was going on. "The whole place is melting! You have to leave before this whole place becomes a pool of water!!” the penguin said while running out what was left of the door leading in to the cells. "Well forget this!” and David smashed through the now splinters of ice that were his cell bars. David began running quickly through the maze of half melted hallways and rooms. "How do you get out of this place?” he shouted. Just then a sea lion came out from one of the doors. "This way!" "Who are you?" asked David. "Never mind that! We haven't much time!" And with that the sea lion grabbed David’s paw and pulled him out of the corridor just as another block of ice came falling to the floor.

"Where are we?" asked David to the sea lion. "We're about 50 feet from the door out to the courtyard." "What's happening? Why is everything melting?” asked David. "Our arch enemies the Palamades are focusing their Solar Multiplier on our kingdom. Ever since the beginning of the Palamadian War they have threatened using it to destroy us. We of course didn't think that such a thing could be built, but as you and I can clearly see, they weren't kidding." They were upon the door now and stepped over it because it was almost completely melted. The rays from the sun were blinding on the snowy surface. A brilliant beam of light was noticeably concentrated on the now defunct palace. It appeared like a laser beam, shifting every now and then to focus its white-hot fury on another unsuspecting building or house. "We have to get to the Barren Plains!” screamed the sea lion as he jerked David from his daydream. The two headed off amongst the chaos toward the horizon.