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by Marcus Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 18+ · Editorial · Satire · #1093171
A look at a hypothetical newsbreak in the future. The year 2012 in Baghdad.
Dateline April 9, 2012, Baghdad, Iraq

"There is lots of news to report today but first we take you now to Beverly Watson in Baghdad where a bold new terrorist event is unfolding. Beverly?"

"Thank you Brian."

"Starting at two PM Baghdad time, three car bombs were detonated simultaneously this morning in the middle of a celebration of the eighth anniversary of the fall of the Statue of Saddam Hussein in central Baghdad. As police and paramedics approached the scenes of the explosions, rocket propelled grenades were launched at their vehicles destroying them and killing or wounding scores more. Shortly afterwards, as if on cue, rooftop insurgents started raking the remaining bystanders with automatic rifle fire killing or wounding hundreds more and herding the onlookers to a portion of the square where four more bombs went off."

"At this point no one has been able get to the dead and wounded to provide medical treatment or to assess the damage. Iraqi troops were sent in to confront the insurgents, but have been pinned down. Both the Iraqi soldiers and the insurgents have been taking heavy casualties. Coalition troops with heavy equipment including tanks are en-route to assist the bogged down Iraqis."

"Of the estimated twenty-five thousand celebrants, it is feared that as many as two thousand may be dead or wounded. That would make this the third largest onslaught of Iraqi civilians since the war began. These casualties are eclipsed only by the three thousand killed and seven thousand wounded in the Baghdad soccer stadium. That was shortly before the mysterious helicopter crash which killed the President and two members of the Cabinet on their flight back from Camp David in 2008. Then there was the twenty-five thousand killed and wounded in the clash between Sunni an Shiite militias which set off the Civil War in the summer of 2007.That was shortly after then Vice President Cheney’s visit and speech to the Iraqi people after and in conjunction with the execution of Saddam Hussein and six of his most vicious henchmen."

"Back to you Brian."

"One Question, Beverly. Do you have any idea who or what is behind this attack?"

"No Brian, at this time no one has claimed responsibility but because it occurred during a celebration for the toppling of Saddam Hussein, it is suspected that it was the work of Ba’ath terrorists but with over two hundred active terrorist organizations, no one will know unless one of them claims responsibility."

"Thank you Beverly."

"To recap America’s longest declared war, it is entering it’s ninety seventh month (longer than all three declared wars in the Twentieth Century together) and to date has cost America the sum of two trillion dollars, equivalent to $60,000 per American or a quarter million for a family of four. Estimated Iraqi casualties in this this ongoing eight year war and the associated civil war are estimated to be about two million with a half million dead, about twice what Hussein was alleged to have butchered. Coalition casualties exceed sixty thousand with about twenty thousand dead, mostly American."

"On an unrelated matter, we now take you to Bill Thomas in Caracas, Venezuela?"

"Venezuela has announced that, with the assistance of Iran and North Korea, it now has a nuclear bomb, joining them, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Syria and South Africa as newest members of the Nuclear Club."

"President Hillary Clinton has been in contact with the Venezuelan President For Life, Hugo Chavez urging him to reconsider, promising substantial foreign aid and further promising to buy Venezuelan crude at two dollars a barrel over the international average price, which is currently a record one hundred and twenty-four dollars a barrel."

"The Governors of our fifty-first state, Puerto Rico and fifty-second state Cuba as well as our President have also lodged protests with Venezuela over their alleged underground nuclear test on an uninhabited island off the coast of Venezuela, which the Venezuelans claim was nothing more than an earthquake."

"Back to you Brian."

"Bill you spoken with President Chavez. Did he give you any idea why his country is going the nuclear route?"

"Yes Brian, he did. He claims the reason is self defense and the country started working on nuclear weapons after the late President Bush had added Venezuela to his Axis of Evil in his 2007 State of the Union address. He said and I quote, “beauty is in the eye of the beholder and so is evil”. He goes on to point out the only member of that dubious list that has been invaded, is Iraq, which didn’t possess a nuclear deterrent and claims if we hadn‘t been bogged down in Iraq and Afghanistan, we would have attacked Venezuela."

"Thank You Bill."

"Meanwhile, Secretary of State, Obama has been in contact with the mayors of Cleveland, St Louis and Miami where the ongoing riots seem to be petering out. The riots are still going strong in Philadelphia and Gary, Indiana. On the international scene new riots have started in Karachi, Pakistan and Birmingham, England while the violence has finally subsided in Paris where a terrorist plane had knocked off the top third of the Eiffel Tower, causing several hundred deaths last month."

"When we return, we will discuss whether the reconstituted draft or the astronomical price of gas and oil which reached as high as $8.79 per gallon, precipitated the riots and what the present administration is prepared to do about the ongoing environmental problems, with the Secretary Obama."


OF COURSE IT’S FICTION, like I had to tell you that, but really, so has what the present administration has been force feeding us since 9/11. Fictional rational to go to war. Inadequate planning, Totally underestimation of the enemy. No exit strategy. Stationing only enough troops to perpetuate a stalemate. Continuously overlooking all the bad news to point out the paltry good news. 3,000 plus dead since the declared end of hostilities.

Regarding my scenario, let’s hope nothing like this ever happens. Impossible you say? I say improbable but not impossible. Prepare for the long long,long haul, unless the new congress throws up their collective hands and says Enough!
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