The Little Boy

I don’t really know how to say this
Or where to start
Don’t know if my points gonna miss
Or if it’ll hit you in the heart
I’ve been thinking for several days at a time
How will I say this?
I keep playing it out in my mind
See I’m here for one reason
And one reason only
It’s to tell you about how
I’m no longer lonely
Not like how I used to be
And so I’m writing to introduce the new me
And tell you that now I’m seeing things differently
At first when I decided to write you
I had no clue what to say
And I searched my brain
Would go day to day
Thinking the exact same thing
Like you don’t wanna listen to me ramble
So I’m stepping out on a limb and taken a gamble
Because I really think you ought to hear this
It’s about what I put myself in
It’s about back then
About my situation
See back when we knew each other
We met 5 or 6 hours a week
I felt like we hated one another
So I kept to myself and tried not to speak
See when all you wanted to do was teach
In my mind I had you impeached
I accused you of being bitter being angry
Even accused you of hating me
I never said it but that’s what I was thinking
But I never really even knew you
Then again I never took the time too
Now that I’m grown I see I was confused
So I want to apologize, say I’m sorry to you
I’m not trying to take back what I did
But just know I’m not the same kid
And maybe you can find it in your heart to forgive
And one day we can put all that stuff behind our backs
And we can walk away from it down a different path
And who knows maybe we could even be friends
But right now I’m just trying to make amends
See before I wrote this God put you on my mind
And suddenly I had to put my life in rewind
I was a lost little boy, lonely looking for a home
But I had no where to go
So I took my own road
But then again there were a few people that I followed
My best friend was a drug dealer and used it too
And yet I considered him my crew
And there were more guys, mainly two
All four of us would cut class and gamble in the hall
Guess we thought it was cool, and we had it all
But it all got old, and got old fast
And as time came to pass
I began to see just what all was going on
I was seeing where I was going wrong
And then one night I found my Lord
And I knew I didn’t need that stuff anymore
He took away that lonely feeling I had deep inside
And he replaced it with something that you could never buy
An unconditional love with no strings attached
He was the patch that covered my wounds
And as I’m composing this tune
I can’t wait to give you this soon
See I wanted to say all of this stuff about two years back
But I got fear stricken like a panic attack
That old thinking came back to me again
About how you hated me and would until the end
But every day I would see you
I swear I wanted to just walk right up to you
And say Jesus loves you too
You may already know it
May have heard it before
But God put it on my heart to let you hear it once more
I’m not perfect; in fact I’m far from it
In fact that’s really the beauty of it
No matter who you are
Or where you’re from
No matter what you did
Or what you’ve done
He will be there when you are down
And He never leaves you
He is always around
This really is the best advice
Man, for real I promise He turned around my life
If you are constantly searching for something
But you don’t know what it is
Maybe you should sit down and have a talk with Him
Listen to what he has to say
And invite Him in because He can make everything ok
Please read this over
Really think about it
God really works miracles
And in case you doubt it
Look at me, and remember who I used to be
That little boy trying to make you angry
That little boy who constantly did wrong
Well that little boy has grown up
And that little boy is strong
I no longer walk alone
Because I found where I belong
So once again with all of my heart
I’m sorry, sincerely I am
I hope now you can forgive me
And see I’m a brand new man
And for all of the kids in the future
Or the ones that you’ve ever taught just like me
Keep hope for them, and show them love that they need
And for everybody who has treated you like I did
Don’t keep that hurt, just burn that bridge
If I could say I’m sorry for them
I want you to know in a minute I would
Even though they should
But I can’t it’s not my place, not my neighborhood
I can’t say I’m sorry to you enough times
But that little boy who hurt you has been left behind
And so this is my letter, my apology
From the man I am now
And the little boy I used to be
I’m sorry, and I hope one day
You can find it in you heart to forgive me
I blame no one for my actions
The fault is all on me
So for now this is goodbye
The little boy is gone
And for now, so am I