Proper Oral Hygiene

Danny pushed through the door to the bar and casually glanced around, taking careful note of the surroundings. As part of a high-class hotel, this bar was a far cry better than some he’d been in. The people milling around wore suits and cocktail dresses and sipped martinis instead of beer.

Still, it was a bar, and as such deserved to be entered with care. Just in case.

Danny finally spotted his target sitting on one side of the room, back to the wall but eyes on the bar in front of him. Walking up to him, Danny identified the subject of the man’s attention: a pile of familiar looking cookies.

Danny arrived at the man’s side and took a seat next to him as Rusty’s long fingers twisted apart one of the Oreos and slipped the top chocolate wafer into his mouth. He grinned at Danny as he crunched down.

“We have somewhere to be in fifteen minutes,” Danny commented calmly.

“You’re the one who has the thing. I just have to stand there. And not fall asleep. That would be impolite.” Rusty licked the frosting off the bottom wafer.

“Do you really think now is the time for a snack?”

“Course. Need to keep my blood sugar up. Besides, black and white… matches the tux.”

Danny frowned. “It does. And so will your teeth.”

“Nah.” Rusty pulled a travel-sized toothbrush and toothpaste from the inside pocket of his coat and set them on the bar. “I came prepared.”

Danny lifted an eyebrow. “You carry around a toothbrush?”

“Yup.” Rusty popped the bottom wafer into his mouth. “I take my oral hygiene seriously.”

“And you’ve done this for how long?”

“As long as you’ve known me.” Rusty was now selecting his next cookie.

“Really.” Danny tone made it clear that he couldn’t decide if he was being put on.

“It’s big with the ladies.” Rusty smirked in Danny’s direction and waggled his eyebrows.

“Is that so?”

Rusty nodded. “It has to do with the youthful fun of frosting accompanied by the mature responsibility of regular brushing and flossing. Apparently very appealing.”

Danny didn’t comment for a moment as he watched Rusty finally decide on the next Oreo and begin to twist it carefully. “Seems you’ve thought this through. If it works so well, though, I’d have expected you to RSVP for ‘Rusty and guest.’”

Rusty shrugged and sharply twisted off the top of the cookie. “Sometimes a guy just likes to have a cookie.” He ended up with the frosting half on the top and half on the bottom wafer. “Without any other distractions.”

They sat in silence for a few moments, both gazing across the bar at the shelved stacked with a variety of glasses, before Rusty returned his attention to his cookie and Danny checked the clock on the wall. Twelve minutes.

Out of the corner of his eye, Danny could see someone slipping into the stool on the other side of Rusty. Turning, he met the smile of a pretty woman whose gaze was fixed on Rusty as he bit into another cookie.

Danny listened, ignored, as the woman introduced herself as Diane and determinedly tried to pry information out of Rusty.

Rusty kept his eyes mostly on his Oreos and his answers short. Apparently today was the sort of day when he only wanted the cookie.

After several minutes it was clear that Diane was becoming irritated by Rusty’s less than enthusiastic reception of her attention. Danny was about to remind Rusty of their pressing commitment when Diane abandoned subtlety.

“How about you and I go somewhere a little more… private?”

Rusty picked up another cookie and then looked up at the woman, silent, eyebrows raised.

Diane pressed on. “You seem a little… tense. I thought I could help you relax. I’m very skilled.” She said this last with a significant glance and a tiny grin. It was clear to Danny that she was used to instant agreement after such an offer.

Rusty’s eyes flicked away from the woman’s. He patiently maneuvered off the top wafer of the Oreo in his hand. Perfect twist. He gave it a slow, lazy lick that grabbed the attention of both Diane and Danny.

“Well, Diane,” he said slowly, still focused on his cookie. “I’m sure your skills are admirable…”

Now Rusty raised his eyes once again and gestured to Danny. “His are better.” He popped the cookie in his mouth.

Diane sucked in a sharp breath and looked quickly between the two of them. “I see.” There was an awkward pause. “Well then, have a good night.” She walked away from the two men and out of the bar.

Danny gestured to the clock.

“I don’t think she believes me,” Rusty said, wiping his hands on a napkin and picking up his toothbrush and paste.

“Shame.”

“Yeah.” Rusty shrugged. Sometimes, you just wanted a cookie.