Wow, this is certainly a great poem that has an ABAB rhyming scheme. to be honest with you, I have trouble writing ABAB poem(only stick to AABB poems)but you did a excellent job with the flow of this poem by producing very good rhyming. plus, the meaning of this poem and how it's written is fantastic. I love poems relating to destiny and curiosity. overall exceptional art!
Wow, I have to be honest, I only wrote one romantic poem because I never fell in love before, so it isn't my strong point. I see you have an AA rhyming scheme in the second and forth stanza. It has a good rhyming flow, but what impresses me the most is the emotions and metaphors packed in this poem as you express your feelings of love. Overall, excellent job!
First off, I want to thank you so much for the award; It certainly made my day. I certainly love this poem, meaning and beat flew off my tongue as I read this out loud. I saw an AABB rhyming flow that sounded like music with passion speaking strongly about a cause. very creative and well put words created in this piece. overall, Excellent job!
wow, this is a really great rhyming poem! it flows like music and I certainly like the word choice. It can be hard to say what you want to say while keeping a great rhyming scheme, but it looks like you had no problems at all. overall, excellent job!
hi, I would love to help. this is a great paper. I do have some suggestions. first, I wouldn't cite in the the introduction or the conclusion. those ideas are your creative mind. teachers want to see you shine in your own words in these paragraphs. start off with a great hook sentence like with a question or a personal statement about yourself, like "what causes us to be so addicted to food?" or "I never had weight problems, but I can understand how this can effect many Americas." second, teachers love complex sentences with strong meaning, but maybe you have too many of them; teachers like variety, so try to mix up simple, regular, and complex sentences. third, try to add smart words in your text. I have a vocabulary builder book at home which teaches you intelligent words, and tells you how to use them in a sentence and when they should be used, but now you can find this source online. teachers love when you use these words, especially English teachers. third, make sure you are citing right, because you will be marked down on points for the citation page being wrong. what kind of citation do you need to use? I can tell you the place to go for the proper source. overall, excellent paper, all papers needs to be looked at over and over, even mine.
wow, great rhyming poem with a great message behind the poetry. you expressed yourself very well with words of passion, and love the rhyme choices as well. this is my favorite line,"Until then we must remember and learn. So these sacrifices are not made in vain." this line of egoism expresses what Americans take for granted. overall, excellent job!
wow, what an excellent poem on existence. great metaphors with powerful meaning! you have a gift for expressing words with creativity. my favorite line is "a dark without abstinence." a lot of strength in this art form which will inspire hope.
very touching story that inspired my soul. my father gave up my sister already. she is very happy! I don't know what I would do within my parents. they are my knight and shining armor. it sounds like you did very well without him. he is watching and is proud from heaven!
THE RHYMING WAS EXCELLENT IN THIS POEM! EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT INTERESTED IN WHALES, THE STORY WAS GREAT BECAUSE OF THE RHYMES. THE BEST RHYME WAS " COMING UP FAST, A HIGH-DIVING CREATURE-- A SPECTACULAR VISION OF THIS AQUROUS FEATURE!" KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK, AND I HOPE TO SEE MORE POETRY FROM YOU SOON
THIS IS AN EXCELLENT POEM! I AM SO SORRY THAT YOUR CILD IS VERY ILL. WHEN I WAS TWO YEARS OLD, I ALMOST DIED FROM ST. JOHNSON'S SYNDROME. ALL THE DOCTORS TOLD MY PARENTS THAT I WAS GOING TO DIE, BUT BY A MIRACLE, I SURVIVED, AND I HOPE YOU GET YOUR MIRACLE TOO. GOD BLESS YOU, AND GOOD LUCK TO YOU AND YOUR CHILD. KEEP UP THE GREAT WRITING!
ITHIS IS AN EXCELLENT POEM! IT'S GOOD THAT YOU HAVE SO MUCH FAITH IN THE LORD. I USED TO BE SO RELIGIOUS, I USED TO GO TO CHURCH EVERY SUNDAY, BUT WHEN I WAS 18, I HAD A MENTAL BREAKDOWN, AND I SAW SO MUCH SUFERING IN THIS WORLD. NOW, I CONQUERED MOST OF MY PROBEMS AND I'M THINKING ABOUT GOING BACK TO GOD. I DON'T KNOW HOW JOB DID IT. I HOPE YOU WRITE MORE GREAT POEMS. GREAT JOB! GOD BLESS YOU.
I LOVE THIS POEM! IT IS FULLED WITH EMOTION. GREAT WORD SELECTION.REPETITION WORK GOOD IN THIS THIS POEM WITH SAY "DOES IT HAVE TO BE THIS LONELY THIS LONG." I FEEL VERY LONELY TOO. I HAVE NOT HAD A RELATIONSHIP IN 7 WITH A PERSON THAT I LIKE; PLUS I AM ALONE IN MY HOUSE A LOT, AND IT DRIVES ME CRAZY. BEST WISHES TO YOU.
THIS POEM HAS VERY POWERFUL WORDS ON HAPPINESS. IT IS AN EXCELLENT POEM. I HAVE TO ADMIT; I WAS FEELING DOWN TODAY BECUSE I ONLY GOT 15 MIN. OF SLEEP, AND WHEN I DON'T GET ENOUGH SLEEP, I FEEL DEPRESSED, BUT THIS POEM LIFTED UP MY MOOD. I DIDN'T WANT THE POEM TO END. EXCELLENT WORK!
THIS IS A GREAT WAR POEM! I DIDN'T WANT THE POEM TO END BECAUSE IT WAS SO GOOD. THE BEST LINE WAS AT THE END WHEN YOU WROTE "ONE WAY TO GET OUT IS TO CONTINUE TO FIGHT." I RESPECT WAR VETS., SINCE MY GRANDFATHER WAS I WORLD WAR II VET., AND I LOOKED UP TO HIM. NOW I STUDY WORLD WAR II KNOWLEDGE AS A HOBBY. I HOPE YOU WRITE MORE WAR POEMS. GOOD JOB!
THIS IS A GREAT POEM, AND GOOD WORD SELECTION. YOU CAN'T BE IN A HARMFUL RELATIONSHIP. YOU MUST THINK ABOUT YOUR SAFETY FIRST. YOU WILL ONE DAY MEET SOME WHO WON'T HURT YOU AND WILL TREAT YOU WITH RESPECT, AND YOU WILL LOVE THIS PERSON TOO. I HOPE YOU FIND THAT SPECIAL SOMEONE. GOD BLESS YOU.
ALL THAT YOU WROTE IS SO TRUE. EXCELLENT POEM. I DIDN'T WANT TO START READING BECAUSE IT IS SO GOOD OF A WRITE. MY MEANING OF A MAN IS SOMEONE WHO CAN SUPORT THEMSELF AND THEIR FAMILY, BOTH EMOTIONALLY AND MONEY WISE. I AM NOT A MAN YET BECAUSE I AM STILL DEPENENT ON MY FATHER AND MOTHER, BUT ONE DAY, I WILL BE A MAN LIKE YOU. GOD BLESS YOU.
THIS IS AN EXCELLENT POEM! I AM A RECOVERING ALCOHOLIC, BUT THEN I HIT "ROCK BOTTOM." THAT IS WHEN I KNEW I HAD TO CHANGE MY ACTIONS AND THINKING. I CAN RELATE TO YOUR STORY BECAUSE I USED TO DRINK 21 BEERS 7 DAYS A WEEK, THEN I DEVELOPED A STOMACH ULCER, AND IT WAS SO PAINFUL I COUND'NT EAT ANYTHING; PLUS I LOSE 85 POUNDS IN A MONTH AND A HALF. I HOPE YOU RECOVERED FROM ALCOHOLISM. LIFE IS MUCH BETTER WITHOUT IT. KEEP UP THE GREAT WRITING.
I'M SORRY THAT YOUR DAUGHTER RAN AWAY FROM YOU. MY BROTHER, WHO IS 38, CUT THE REST OF THE FAMILY OUT OF OUR LIVES FOR DUMB REASONS WHEN HE BECAME A FATHER. MY PARENTS WERE HEART BROKEN, THEY WERE ALSO UPSET BECAUSE THEY COULDN'T BE GRANDPARENTS, AND IT BROKE MY HEART WHEN I COUUN'T ACT AS AN UNCLE. YOU EXPRESSED YOURSELF GREAT IN THIS POEM. EXCELLENT WORD SELECTION. GOD BLESS YOU!
YOU EXPRESS YOURSELF WELL HERE. I'M SORRY FOR YOUR PAIN. MY FAMILY IS TORN APART, AND I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO GET ALONE WITH EVERYONE I HAVE ONE BROTHER WHO CUT OFF MY PARENTS FOR DUMP REASONS, AND THEY FEEL PAIN EVERYDAY. I KNOW ITS NOTHING WHAT YOU BEEN THROUGH, BUT I CAN FEEL YOUR PAIN A LITTLE BIT BECAUSE I BEEN THROUGH HELL ALL MY LIFE. I HOPE EVERY WORKS OUT FOR YOU, AND GOD BLESS
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