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Review of Madness of March  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
The happy and carefree atmosphere of March is shown well in this prose poem. March is a gentle month with soft winds and mild sunshine. flowers bloom and buds dance in anticipation in this season of spring. Men and women walk the gardens with arms locked around each other. Love is in the air.

Sports and athletics are just the activities sought after by boys and girls. The playgrounds are alive and bright with their shouts and screams as they make a goal or reach the finishing line.

"For basketball fans, it can be ecstatic. 64 collegic teams, sent around the country, to battle on the court for glory."

edit-
"collegic"
(college)

March combines many wonderful things as stated by the author. Easily the best loved month throughout the globe.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
What a terrible mishap! why was a mysterious drug given to her friend with what appears to be half knowledge.

Friend's fate was sealed by death and that of the other, by being put behind bars. So much for friendly love!

The poet creates a situation that certainly makes us wonder why such things happen. This poem is also a lesson in what to do and what not to do.

An unsavory event is well shown in this rhyming poem with simple word choices and clarity of expression.

"Her best friend died, and she killed her,
and her guilt is the small price she pays.

Guilt is a punishment for life.

It flows well.

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Review of Please don't cry  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Written from a departed soul's point of view, this prose poem pulls me in with sentiments and keen observations of its earthly companion.

Playing true to his dead wife's memories, it is remarkable to see him pay homage at her tomb every week with her favorite flowers.

"I get new flowers every week, and they are always my favorite kinds."

Patient and loving as they come.

The words, "I miss you" carry all the sadness and love he bears in his heart for her who is no more.
Death is such an unbearable finality!

The spirit of the wife is still in love with him, though not capable of communication. It is an appealing moment, well depicted.

""I'm right here, love!" I say again. "

The silence and the desperate love between the couple is well shown.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Contrary to the view that east and west cannot meet, I find it fructifying through years and across continents.

This romantic poem best expresses the depth and profundity of true love. If there is a strong will it can win the toughest of odds is what is proved by the lovers.

"Through miles of distance, we bridged the gap,
Creating a bond stronger than any map."

Unlike the tragic lovers we heard of, this particular romance ends on a note of ceaseless love.

Rhyme and rhythm take me to their worlds apart.

Word choices are simple, yet touch my hear to the core.

I only wonder if it is ever possible for them to join in wedlock and live a happy life together.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
So far, the narration of a family saga sounds interesting. So what happens next? More questions are there on my mind.

The father with a history of four wives and their children now living under one roof makes an interesting read.

In my country, men marry once and that's all come rain or shine.
I realize that different cultures have different practices.

Each character is given certain characteristic features, which the author describes with verve and enthusiasm.

You talk about a secret, which is still not revealed. I do wonder about it.
Hope you will put your pen to the journal continue to write about the later events.
I wish you luck.

Language and style are certainly the best credits of this short nonfiction story.

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Review of A Writing Process  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
This article is obviously about a part of training process. There is tension and thrill in flying down almost touching the vast ocean and then finding "saving grace", a parachute that takes the author to the earthly destination.
With solid ground under feet, he or she finds confidence given by a feeling of security.

Fly or swim, finally one needs earth under feet.

"knowing that the ground beneath my feet remain solid."

Edit-

"tiny whips"
(tiny wisps)

"Without seconds thought,"
(Without second thoughts,)

Interesting narration.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Indeed, laughter lights up life. That it is the best medicine, is shown literally by the hospital scene you created so well.

That apart, you hooked me with the top sentence that presents Veronica as a colorful person, with her red head, yellow Volvo, a vivid turquoise clothing, not to mention the flowers she fetches to greet the patients, her mom in particular.

Hers is indeed the best way to "buy and sell" that appeals to all, real estate included.

I think everyone should have a Veronica in their lives, who spreads positive vibes and lets us live life with a little more worth than we give it credit for.

There is just this one little edit, which I don't want you to miss.

" to heVeronicar"
(to hear Veronica's)


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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
I appreciate your effort in telling the main events of Herman Melville's psychological novel of gigantic proportions, published in 1851. It is a kind of thriller, the fight is between a human being and a sperm whale.

A novel with a similar theme was written by Earnest Hemmingway, named "The Old man and the Sea" in the year 1952 nearly a hundred years later. This depicts the epic struggle between an old seasoned fisherman and the greatest catch of his life, a giant marlin.

The difference is that in the former we see Captain Ahab fights with vengeance against Moby Dick and gets killed in the final fight, whereas in the latter we see Santiago proving a point that man might be destroyed but not defeated. Critics have termed it as battle between nature and man.

Both have great themes, providing stuff to research for scholars and readers all over the world.

Thanks for igniting a wish to bring out the difference in the above classics.

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Review of She's a Beauty  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Stanza 1 is drenched in nature's beauty as winter approaches. Birds, "the The last of the hummingbirds, a fleeting sight," come to my mind's eye effortlessly.

The neighbor's ire is described with equal flair, this time about human misfeatures, such as failing to appreciate the positive features of surrounds.

The lesson comes with the last stanza. Our deeds and words come back with the same force with which we use them.

This is reality with a life's lesson.
"'Cause Karma's a beauty, and she'll have the last say."

I appreciate the imagery and the use of prompt words.

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10
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Review of Them Woods  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Beautiful ballad about the hollering woods and the presence of the devil.

The boy went roaming into the forest by the hillside and unawares came across the weird silence in the woods and he as warned.

The description of the woods is real good.

" The birds,
the breeze
and all the trees
was hushed like they was scared.:

It scared the boy as well. He left his father's words behind and turned his back on the sinister bush.

What I like-
is the language used. At places it sounds like cockney with grammar going haywire, with a nice accent of its own.

"The sun was beatin' brightly
and there weren't a cloud at all."

Rhythm and flow win me over.
Thanks for sharing.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
This poem begins with a realisation.

“I ran away from all my pain….”

Poet’s depiction of reality shows that despite knowing better, some of us cling to pain.

“But I never wanted to be taught
How to leave that pain behind.”

Solution to end pain comes in the end. Pain stops growth.
Poem ends on a note of realisation again.

“… I know I will never last
If I think I am already dead.”

Right knowledge dawning finally.

Images of a mind rent with pain and those that conquer it, are appealingly used.

It flows well

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12
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Review of No Fear  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Belief and faith in Jesus come through without obstacles of doubt and hesitation.
When no one lends support and succor, we turn to God if we happen to believe in Him.

"There is hope in the one, who holds your life dear.
Why fear the unknown?"

Yes. The whole world of fauna and flora depend on the Creator. He who has given life also takes care of letting them lead a happy life.

It is all a matter of utter surrender when all the other doors are closed.

It is a visual poem with a great flow and telling imagery.

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Review of Untitled  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
The darkest phase that a soul passes through is when it burns with "angst" due to bitterness of failure and loneliness.

"Still the empty embrace of loneliness

Though there is no one in sight to be blamed for the individual's state of life, the soul burns. Perhaps there is no ending to soul's strife ruled by discontent and dejection.

This free style poem well voices the misery, "the fire inside."

Memories are a powerful fuel to feed the fire till extinguished.
"As the memories will blur, and burn to embers and ash."

Impressive read!

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Dreams of a much cherished lover never fade away.
The writer did show as to how she tried to dissolve her dreams.

The deep impact that her dream lover had on her subconscious is graphically described.
“You came like a force…You invaded me.”

She gives voice to how an overwhelming love had its impact on her.
She was “a scared mess…”
It’s like Heathcliffe’s passion for Catherine Earnshaw.

Language and style draw me in.

The tale is told from first and second person’s point of view.

Appeals to my sensitivity.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Imagining joyous things taking place in life calls for a special talent.
This little girl who has no one of her own has the wealth of imagination through which she finds hope for a better tomorrow.

Her wish and dream to have a brother is blessed by the stars. Writer’s style of fulfilling a little girl’s wish is unique. The story that is creared in which a long lost brother is found, semes like something from real life.

I can easilyvisualize her dancing in the rain which she willed.

Somewhat fascinating.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
What you said makes a lot of sense to me.

It’s true that we, the human beings often find ourselves adrift in the ocean of chaos and bewilderment, when tragedy hits us.
You offered wise counsel as to how to face such a soul-shattering situation.

As you have advised, we need to listen to the “silence of the universe”. We certainly find a way to light from darkness, a way to wisdom from ignorance. It takes patience and a tranquil mind to achieve this.
Another important point you raised is that we need to “understand the rhythm of….soul”.

In other words, know thyself.

These key factors to peace and success are valuable to all.

Thank you for sharing.

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Review of The Cave  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Looks like the little girl is clairvoyant enough to imagine how their excursion would progress.

Among my observations I find that this story shows the way in which cave explorations are conducted.

“With their helmet lights on….”

Imagination and emotion are well balanced.

“Suddenly the furry creatures…”
“She felt a warm feeling of love….”

Dreams have a way of telling us what is going to take place in life.

“Wake up honey….”

Cristina’s character is definitely endearing.
Language and style are impressive.

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Review of Starlight Parlor  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
A well described starlight parlor.
The poet and a dear friend relax under the moonlit sky enjoying nature and each other’s company.
Imagery is visual.

The stars seem to bend to whisper their secrets to the friends.

“… the campfire slowly dies.”

Reminded of our own camping in the forest thick.

Relief and relaxation are effectively shown.

Rhyming is catchy. Rhythm is natural. Flow is spontaneous.

Hope to see more of your poems.

Have a wonderful WDC Account Anniversary! *Cake*

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Review of Erica...  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This dark love story has its own charm. Tragedies make more impact on the reader than the sweet ending romances.
The final line sums up the way things occur without much of our intervention.

"Life often steals away our choices,..."

It is also my view that many of us fail to obtain success in first love. Life is but a compromise and adjustment.

I also note the bright side of a tragic love.
"You made me a better person. That morning, I set aside the life of addiction and pursued a brighter path,..."
I wonder if it would be possible with her by your side, addicted as she was. But then, who knows?

There is no doubt that the author is a seasoned writer and well-versed in language and style of penning a dark love story.

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Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
In a way, this short but a very real to life poem tells how to calm the mind and invite sleep in a smooth and successful way.

The first part of the poem shows the frame of mind that insists on keeping awake with the reasons thereof.

"Desperate prayers
Grinding angst"

We all go through this phase if we are mentally negatively active at that hour.

So to calm the mind, the poet finds a pleasant process. Breathe in and breathe out in a phased manner.
Finding peace is the result, which is truly consoling.

"Peace returns
Never having gone"

Wonderful!

Crisp and calming, it flows well.
Imagery is visual and appealing.

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Review of First Real Flight  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
The author's first flying experience is told with an honest to earth narrative style. He takes us along with him on his first real flying with the instructor.
I too could look at the whole episode from the writer's point of view. His girth might be wide but his mind is sharp and his interest in flying is so committed that he could maneuver the the flight with ease and effortlessness.

What appeared to be an impossible deed for an outsider like me, is made to look like something that is really possible if you have a mind to do it.

Great! I enjoyed the flight however anticlimactic it might have seemed.

"Looking out at the ground and it’s almost anticlimactic. The ground and buildings; everything is just shrinking away."

Dialog and the mechanics of language are meticulously done.

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Review of Oh Life!  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Through this philosophical poem I understand that there are two definite events for all, i.e. life and death. Death is as certain as life. The two polarities no one can dispute.

"Oh life! How long did I pursue
The end of me the start of you"

The poet loves laughter and peace, yet lives in restlessness.

"My dimming eyes weep on and on"

We can see a mind worried with negative expectations. An ominous feeling about future, which the poet is sure of meeting.


I can visualize the story behind this unending grief, a looming threat to his peace and life.

I am curious to know the details.

The poet's innermost fears are revealed with visual imagery.

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23
Review of path  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Life has many “paths”
We follow the one we are comfortable with.
It could lead to good or bad depending on our character.

On the other hand, the path might be confusing, if there is but one.
In either case, as you say, quite often we do’t know where the path leads us.
So we pray, when in doubt,”lead kindly light.”

With faith in God, we can walk the path with safety and certainty, I believe.

This short and crisp verse is worth contemplating.

It flows well.

Have a wonderful WDC Account Anniversary! *CakeB*

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24
Review of PICTURE POEMS  Open in new Window.
for entry "YIU'RE MY ROSE.Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello Mary!

I am elated to read your poem YIU'RE MY ROSE from your collection of picture poems. First of all, let me acknowledge my wonder and appreciation for your poetry, which lifts my soul and provides inspiration as to how to look at the world of beauty and love understand its depth.

This poem-
The perceptive observation regarding age and beauty is ever so true. Being beautiful in young age is no great matter, though that too is pleasing. But beauty in old age is whole new level.

"With age your beauty grows" and,

"Our golden years begin,"

I do see such people, whose charm lies in their idea of love, where all the misfeatures of youth disappear and only the light of mellowed sweetness remains, like wine that improves with age.

The person in the poem loves her all the more for what she is today, more beautiful than ever.

I can actually see the couple, such is the visual effect of this poem.
It flows well.

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25
Review of Daddy's Toolbox  Open in new Window.
Review by jaya Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (5.0)
A son's feelings for his departed father are expressed while pondering his "toolbox."
His father's tool box has many memories to carry. He learnt the use of different devices stored in the toolbox.
it was a teacher and pupil relation too. He realizes the importance of fixing things and constructing anew.
His father's appreciation obviously means a lot to the son.
"He was impressed that I had remembered how to use one.'

The sense of gratitude and love for father come through in no uncertain terms.
"I miss him and always will. There is comfort in the thought that he is in a better place and that he is also looking down and chuckling, every time I "borrow" a tool from his old grey toolbox."

Wonderful recap of their life together via the toolbox.

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