Hi Justin,
Just wanted to give you my review on this poem and i absolutely loved it very much. I really enjoyed the flow think you did a awesome job. I wouldn't change anything about it either.
Keep writing..
Just reviewing you're poem, feeling kinda lost as to what you're 17 year old eyes saw besides seeing that boy?
my suggestion would be to maybe expand some more on this poem because you are leaving the reader clueless.
Seems like it could be a well written poem just needs some work. I liked how you related to you're journey back in time I feel when I write about things in the past it makes me feel better. Good Luck and Keep Writing. \
I really enjoyed how you incorporated something negative into something positive. This poem has a lot of potential just needs some work. I would begin with grammar and capatalizing the i's into I and wen should be when. I myself have a tendency to cut down on words and use slang words but to make the poem more enjoyable to the reader I would make a few changes. On a more positive note I really enjoyed how you're poem ryhmed. Keep writing :)
Really enjoyed reading you're poem, I love reading poems that ryhme. My Advice to you that I have learned here is to read out loud before posting. On the 2nd line you say " oh how I used instead of use to spend my days. Other than that I loved it.
Ricanlezgirl
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/truelove1201
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.12 seconds at 10:47am on Nov 08, 2024 via server WEBX2.