This was a nice, engaging piece of flash fiction. I see no visible errors, mistakes, or anything to worry about. It's very well written.
From the start, it draws you in and doesn't let go until the end. The imagery, form, setting, and plot are all good. The ending is open ended, although some readers may dislike this, it fits the piece well. Open endings always work better with flash fiction because they leave a lasting impact.
Once again, great piece,
I.A.
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