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Review Requests: ON
556 Public Reviews Given
562 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Overall impression, likes, suggestions, positive closing. I am honored to do reviews upon request, usually on the first day 2023 Quill Winner 2023 BEST REVIEWER
I'm good at...
...emphasizing positive things in addition to at least one suggestion2023 Quill Winner 2023 BEST REVIEWER
Favorite Genres
Biography, short stories, all styles of poetry.
Least Favorite Genres
Horror, Dark because I am not fond of voluntarily being scared.
Favorite Item Types
True stories and experiences
Least Favorite Item Types
Anything that scares me
I will not review...
I will review anything. I have reviewed books, however, they take a lot of time, the turnaround is longer than 3 days.
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review of Blackmail  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Theresa,

I visited your portfolio, looking for a recent piece that hadn’t yet been reviewed. “Blackmail” is just what I was looking for. I have a couple of thoughts and suggestions about your short story. I trust they will resonate with you.

The title and description engaged me. There had to be a juicy tale ahead. In a short, short story you covered a huge subject clearly and succinctly. I liked that. The sequence of events moved seamlessly via dialogue. It almost had the rhythm of poetry. I saw a word I haven’t seen for a very long time: Tamp, as in “Tamp down the laughter. “ it surely is a specific verb!

I have a few things to bring to your attention. A few punctuation marks can be edited:
“It’s serious business. Needs a closing quotation mark. I saw what you did . . . lose your job. Needs quotation marks. The genre portion allows 3 genres, so you have the opportunity to add another. On the same note, I would replace “other “ to one more specific.

Thank you for the story which is quick and easy to read. It left me wanting more. The name and reason there is blackmail left unanswered is a terrific tool to leave every person reading it, not just me, wanting answers to those questions. You are a gifted writer. My stories generally ramble on. Yours reminded me that succinct should be in my arsenal. Thank you for that reminder.

Write on!

tracker

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2
2
Review of Chapter 25  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Darkscape Entertainment,

Welcome to WdC. Your work, “Chapter 25,” appeared on the Read &Review section. The opinions I have are from one person. I hope you will find them useful.

I became engaged with your hook. I knew several things about your character in the first line. It helps further character development by what and how something is said. Further how the message is answered gives an insight into the minds of each character.

One thing I noticed is numerous lines ending with a comma where there should be a period starting with, “. . . time with Tatum,” which are all typos.

I enjoyed reading this chapter. You have a professional style and presentation. Good job.

Write on!
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3
3
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi Elisa,

Your poem, “To Pluto With Love,” appeared on Read & Review. The opinions I share of those of one person. I hope you resonate with them.

I did not feel nauseous at any time reading your poem. I admit I moved to reading without checking genres or the description you provided. Therefore, most of the way through I thought it was a nod toward our former planet Pluto. Perhaps I need my eyes and mind from birthday activities. I appreciated the quasi tongue in cheek. There was a lot of truth in three description and the slobbering nature of some dogs.

I saw the genre comedy after reading as well as the reference to nausea. I liked the topic, the free verse, and the warmth in the closing longing which if not meant for comedic effect was quite sweet.

tracker
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4
4
Review of Raging Screams  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Julie D,

Welcome to WdC. Your first chapter, “Raging Screams” appeared on the Read & Review tab. The thoughts I share with you are the opinions of one person. I hope they will resonate.

Chapter 1 is written in a unique form with the last line of a paragraph wrapped into the first line of the next. I felt it was a good choice. I felt it built up tension and anticipation. I was left wanting to read more. Your characters were introduced with a brief reference to how they were connected with the main person. Revealing one was positive and one the opposite foretells of how the reader can expect them to behave in the future, as well as how the narrator feels about them.

I have a couple of suggestions. First, genre selection is important because readers can etc a genre they like to read and yours would be among the search results. You are allowed three so go ahead and select a third one. Also, the genre other doesn’t give the reader information with which to make a choice. Replace it with something like adventure. Secondly, as I finished reading I felt owed a glimpse of a clue of where the story is going. More of a teaser.

You have an easy writing style with words wisely selected that create a nice rhythm and flow. I look forward to more from you.

Write on!
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5
5
Review of Toe in the Water  
for entry "Weezer Again
Review by tracker
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello Beholden,

I have bee reading Toe in the Water for some time. I am taking the opportunity to write a review. Departing from my usual review format, I will give you my impressions.

I like your blog. Why do I like it? I like it because it is a fun place to stop in for a few minutes. I take that time as a break from stress and working through the plans I have for the day. It is akin to a newspaper editorial written by a free spirited writer. It is more like a commentary on things humans can relate to like what happens when one spider web falls into another? I think it may or may not stick. Each outcome is fine.

Thank you for pretty regular entries. The number of blogs I read you can count on one hand. I selfishly come here to be enlightened or to relive stress. It is a cool thing to know someone reads what you post in your blog. You are invites to mine anytime the mood moves you.

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6
6
Review of Awake At Night  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello yojina,

Welcome to Writing.com. We use the short cut: WdC. I read your poem “Awake At Night” and have a few thoughts to share. These are just one person’s opinions. I hope you find them helpful.

I closely relate to the insomnia you experience. Your poem is descriptive, showing the reader what is going on. This evoked feelings in me which is a good thing. It was a great choice to tell your story in the poem in first person. Biographical and/or non-fiction are not listed as genres, so I am only assuming this is personal. The free verse takes on a nice rhythm. Many lines were average length with only a few long lines.

Your first line grabbed my attention. I imagined myself lying in my bed. I liked the imagery of time dragging its feet and sleep avoiding you. I sense you are inexperienced writer. The technique of repetition in two consecutive lines, “Fear” and “Perhaps” evened me out, allowed me to slow down and take notice as the possible reasons you can’t fall asleep are revealed.

I don’t see any mechanical concerns. I wanted to suggest something about genres. Dark and Emotional are ideal choices. You are allowed one more. Readers find work by the genres they like. Your first work appears at several places so you are apt to get several reviews to keep that going you might want to add a genre like biographical if it applies to you personally.

I am very glad I happened upon your poem. It is very well thought out. I felt like it was right to the point with several points to emphasize ending in some dark thoughts. Which is okay because it left me wanting more. Just what a writer wants. Looking forward to more writing from you. Welcome again. Happy you have joined our community.

Write on!
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7
7
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Pumpkin,

I found your short story when I visited your portfolio tonight. I came to get acquainted as we are both participating in the merit badge exchange. I clicked on the latest item and read “My Favorite Summer.” I have some thoughts to share that I hope resonate with you.

First impression: My first choice to read is a short story. The title conjured up my own best summer. Your choice of genres prepared me for a summer romance. Your hook grabbed me. It set the scene and said the narrator was most likely a boy, and that his object of affection was a pretty girl. I wanted more, to find out what she looked like, and what made their summer special.

The story: Your storytelling skills are superb. I got as much satisfaction out of reading your story as if it was an entire novel. Your descriptive language and purposeful dialogue gave it depth and moved the piece forward.

The end: The illness surprised me. My mind previously jumped to more sinister reasons
Lou went to the country.

Mechanics: There are a few things to look after. In the line starting with, “Dave came out and said . . . home,so-a space is needed after the comma. In “. . . suspected her Mom had called” -M should be a small m. A question mark is needed after Granny in the line, “Why, Granny” and all are innocent typographical concerns.

I thoroughly enjoyed “My Favorite Summer.” “I could barely get a hello to roll off my tongue” was a magical phrase. It told me he was gobsmacked, that this was his first experience being attracted to a girl, and a great replacement phrase for the cat’s got your tongue. I loved all of it. Regardless of typos, I am rating five stars because our system doesn’t allow to go higher. I hope you keep writing more short stories. I have read some of your blog and it confirms my assessment which is you are a gifted writer. Bravo!

Write on!
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8
8
Review of Lena's Violin  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Mousethyme,

As November’s writing month is approaching, I thought of your novella, “Lena’s Violin.” I remember reading it. I came back to read in its current completed form. I have a couple of thoughts to share with you which I hope you find useful.

The plot and corresponding story lines are outstanding. I was immediately fond of Lena in her plight to be noticed by her parents. Her character as well as each of your characters were well developed. Linda, for example, as a villainous person came in and out of the story, yet I knew her kind well. That attests to your secure understanding of the elements of a great story. You show her and even the minor characters in a way each of them is memorable. Great job!

You have finished it and congratulations on the Quill award. It shows many agree with me. It was a fabulous piece for me to read. I am a musician and you nailed the overall and specific talk and actions of my fellow musicians. It is especially important to dress to the expectations of the occasion. She did everything correctly, including the way she fixed her hair. The braided bun would have stood out as going the extra step to present herself in a positive light.

One more run through with editing will help correct a few issues like, for example writing “I seen” instead of “I saw.”

I can bet readers enjoyed this as much as I did. Your dialogue is real and not filled with any “fluff.” I think it is ready to be sent to publishers. I can even picture the cover! You have a winning style. Kudos to you!

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9
9
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Rhyssa,

Your poem "the rhythm of writing" came up under Read & Review at random. I am happy it did because I thoroughly enjoyed reading it. Often, it is difficult to get a nice flow in free verse and you did so very well. It was perfect to read it out loud to get the full enjoyment. I related to shutting down my laptop when words refuse to make themselves known. Having the words run through your mind later, demanding to jump out on your screen, happens to me often.

There were some "stutters" while reading when I came upon a comma at the end of the second stanza. I would change that to a period. The first sentence in the next stanza refers back to that last sentence but can stand by itself. That line, "which reminds of a story I saw on the net," feels like the word me should be in there so it "reminds me." I say that because your other sentences are complete with pronouns.

A terrific read for me this evening. Thank you for writing what I think many writers can definitely relate to.

Write on!
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10
10
Review of Mother of Mine  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello G.B. Williams,

God works in mysterious ways. I clicked on Read & Review, and this second piece of yours came up! "Mother of Mine" is a fabulous tribute to a wonderful woman I feel I know, after reading your story. What a blessing in your life. It sounds like she succeeded instilling in you everything she taught, most importantly praying every day. Personally, I had a near death experience and went to Heaven. I know that she wanted to reach you to be sure you are getting along okay. You know how we mothers are. We aren't truly happy unless we are worrying about one or another of our children.

There was a little typo you may want to correct to have a flawless piece. "My daughter call's me" needs the apostrophe removed.

My faith is restored over and over as I am given the privilege to read about the lives of others. Thank you for talking about so many wonderful lessons your mom taught to you. She sounds like she could have been unfiltered, but in a way that kept her true to her beliefs. That is something wonderful to have as a memory. Write on!

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11
11
Review of Reflections on ME  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello G.B. Williams,

Your work "Reflections on ME!" came up under Read & Review. How lucky I am to have had the privilege to read it. I liked the confidence you showed with your testimony. You use positive words making emphasis on important words with capital letters, as you did in your title. "His lord said unto him, Well done, good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord." Matt 25:23 (KJV). I thought of this verse immediately.

There is one small typographical fix needed in the expression "serve other" needs an s at the end.

Surprising to me, not you I would suspect, is the notion that if God is purported to be dead then He must have lived. That was my favorite part. My wish is for ongoing good health for you in order to keep on the service which you are meant to perform.

Write on!
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12
12
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Welcome to newbies
Hello William,

Welcome to WdC. It is great to have you join our fine community. Our main focus is to read and review each other's work, giving impressions of your work. I found you by searching for the genre poetry. I looked at the genres you selected before reading and noticed it is satirical, even comical. My impression it is actually quite insightful. The analogy to the ducks gave me a good idea what you meant to convey. As we get older, we can move away from the crowd and observe rather than be in the midst of the crowd. That is something I related to. The other poems say they are in your book. Rather than read them here, I have your book now in my Kindle Cloud Reader so I can enjoy them all as time permits.

From a reader's perspective, I would remove the hyphens. It made me stop and interrupted the flow.

A relative of mine went to Montreal and enjoyed fois gras. Thanks for sharing your work. I see you have a couple of reviews already. I sneaked a peek at your book collection. I like what I am reading. Thanks for the shoutout about how to find it.

Write on!
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13
13
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Drew,

I searched for biographical poetry and your poem "Forever a 1990's kid" popped up. Reading it gave me a glimpse at what a wonderful childhood you had. Your memories reminded me of the things you pointed out. I like the way you write in free verse. You are able to be free with the way you remember and list the things that gave you great joy.

I noticed there are a couple of things missed in editing. "Saturdays is always a adventures." I think you meant it is always "an adventure." In the line there was " All that ", As if- There needs to be quotation marks "As if." Mcdonalds should be McDonalds. I was puzzled about the rough start you mentioned at the beginning. I was hoping there would be more about that.

Wouldn't it be cool to go back and be young like that for a day, even a few hours to recapture that feeling. I enjoyed reading this. I actually read every poem in your portfolio. Each had something to say, a message that was supported by experience or beliefs. Good job!

Write on!
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14
14
Review by tracker
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello Arakun,

After some time as a member, and hearing about flash fiction, I took the time to come check out to see what the requirements are for writing a piece for this type of story. I like that the word count is comparatively low. The prompt allows for any number of stories. I especially liked the caveat about sad stories. I have a little story cooking in my brain and plan to participate for August. I know how much time you volunteer to run the event day by day with the help of worthy judges. Good luck with carrying the group on for what appears to be ongoing for twenty years.

Write on!
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15
15
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hello Korosu,

Welcome again to WdC. Thanks for asking me to review your story "The Alabaster Doe & The Amber Wolf." I have some thoughts to share that I hope you will find helpful.

Initial impression: The genres tells me this is a romance/story and fantasy written for a contest. The KB size told me it was about 3800 words, so I needed some extra time to read. I scanned over it and saw a line break about half way. The site's text size is small.

Content: The story of the Amber Wolf and the Doe is unique and creative. The fantasy of having the doe not die but reveal itself as a demi-human is believable.

Development opportunities: I appreciate your piece is noted as a work in progress. The story plot and character development is wonderful. It is in serious need of editing. One major flaw is the name Hester, according to my online research, is strictly a female's name. It tripped me up because of the famous Hester Primm from "The Scarlett Letter." Along the way the word a is used when it should be an. One other thing to work on is one of the guidelines of a great short story which is to show us your story. You have told us the story with so many details we don't have the chance to imagine scenes, character's feelings, and the like. One example is describing Doe's name as "uncreatively named." I liked the name Doe.

Thanks again for the privilege to read and review your story. I look forward to reading the completed draft. Write on!

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16
16
Review by tracker
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Jake,

I am responding to your newsfeed link to "New beginnings as the Old Joe Retires." I have a few thoughts that I hope will resonate with you.

Your free verse style was taken places I never thought possible. You have a comprehensive list of the things invoked. Some of them I had forgotten, but all are the truth. I liked the way you used the large size text. It makes it so much easier for my older eyes to read. I would expect no less than perfection in the mechanical department. The only improvement I would like to say is not to use "Other" for a genre. It does not tell you any good information, and takes away one opportunity for others to read your work. You may think about another category you may to use in its stead, or not. Completely your choice.

A personal comment is you have taken being nice to such overt evil to a whole new level. That is the sign of a great orator/writer.

Write on!
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17
17
Review of Wise  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Bodhisattwa Parekh,

Thank you for requesting a review of your poem "Wise" which I have just read. I have a few thoughts for you that I hope you will find helpful.

It would help to have the picture prompt with your poem, but I can imagine it as well from the description you nicely provided. Hands lifted aloft represent a supplication to a higher being, in this case God. Using an exclamation point at the end of the first two lines emphasized their importance. Where can one turn in times of trouble is the question and you provide an answer, "You pray for help to God."

In the lines, "That situation occurs, Almost every life" as stated feels unnatural. The is transition word. I would change "almost" to "In every life." The word "almost" casts doubt for some who may not believe in a God or otherwise worship differently. The word almost negates the point you are making that, as I understand it, in every life there are situations which can be made better by asking for God's help.

The free verse is conducive to what you wanted to convey. I would have liked to see it in some sort of poem pattern with rhymes to direct the reader's path.

Thanks again for the privilege of reading and reviewing your poem. Write on!

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18
18
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Welcome to newbies
Hello Ginger R,

Welcome to our fabulous community. I am honored to be asked to review your chapter book. Our focus is to read and review each other’s work. I have read “Colorful Love Life” and have some thoughts to share. These are only my opinions. I hope they will resonate with you.

First impression: I look at the title, rating, genre, and description first. One of my favorite types of writing is autobiographical work. We learn much about people, can relate to experiences, and enjoy an uplifting, inspirational, or life lesson true story.

Content: Your story is constructed in a manner that from the strong hook about discussing things you mostly don’t want to talk about I was all in. The first paragraph told me what you would discuss and why it was important for me to read on. I liked the way, after the introductory paragraph, your story was written chronologically. Throughout, I learned much needed information about your parents and their parenting style. There are stereotypes in all ethnicities. I am not sure all are aware of the others.

One of the important ways to get exposure to your work is by the genres you choose. I suggest you remove “other” because regular readers can access genres they enjoy reading through our search function. I can almost guarantee not many check that category. You also want to choose all three genres available to you. This is most assuredly “inspirational.” There are a lot of choices. As time goes on, you will be accustomed to them and see what genres are noted in the pieces you read. It would help if you do another edit for a couple of typos and punctuation concerns.

Bravo on a wonderfully written story. The subject matter is important and the happy ending provided by Mr Ginger R was a welcome reward at the end of the story. Keep writing. I will keep reading!

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19
19
Review of Mirrored  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Welcome to newbies

Hi D.K.D.,

Welcome to our community. Thank you for your individual request to review your work "Mirrored." I am honored to give you some thoughts which come from one person. I hope they will resonate with you.

First impression: Your presentation is fabulous and professional. Your description of the work, in itself, is a huge hook that had me engaged before I started to read. Nice job! The increased size of the text is a huge plus. It is so much easier to comfortably read. Keep doing that. The lay out of one line paragraphs is effective.

Content: The story, identified as fiction, is about as real as you can write! I liked the universal theme that I can relate to, as I presume every reader will do the same. Your word choices fit well. The comments of the two characters I named "me" and "myself" showed the theme throughout. It was unique and outright fun to read, anticipate, and savor an original plot.

Overall impression: You are an accomplished and gifted writer. A suggestion which comes out of being new. When you select the genres to categorize your writing, selecting a total of three specific ones will help people who search for their favorite genre locate your work. There is the Search feature near the top of the left hand navigation panel. Notice the drop down box when you type in that box. Therefore, "other" would be one you would want to replace with another genre like psychology and emotional or experience.

Thank you for the privilege of reading one of your early works. It gave me reason to think about how I would feel going through the same exercise. Best of all, owing to your expertise and my thirst for new to me original writing, I was left wanting more! Welcome again!

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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama-It's a Party!

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Review of Promptly Poetry  
for entry "New Beginnings
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Amethyst Angel,

Taking Lilli up on her suggestion we review each other, I am reviewing your first week prompt in PPC5 "New Beginnings." I can tell you up front that I am thrilled you turned to rhyme in sharing your thoughts. Each rhyme was specific to your story and was fun to read. A nice pace and toe tapping rhythm and pace were terrific until I read the statement about wondering why you were bothering to rhyme. The three periods made me pause.

Instead of reading on right away, I pondered why you would question using a rhyming poem style when it was effectively fulfilling the prompt. Reading on, the free verse was a stark contrast to the first rhymed lines. It felt disjointed and was a bit of a challenge for me to understand. I think your last sentence, "Creating new beauty from ashes and dust" may refer to rising up like a phoenix?

I would recommend taking the free verse second part after three periods, and continue in the rhyming pattern. You have some good words there to rhyme with like "fit." The line "The meter doesn't fit" could be followed with "My new way's not to quit."

Good luck with your new beginnings and continuing with regular weekly pieces in the PPC5 activity. You are a gifted writer.

Write on!
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#1300305 by Maryann

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21
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Review of New Beginnings  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Sunny,

With Lilli's encouragement to review PPC5 entries, I am reviewing your first week's prompt "New Beginnings." Your free verse sharing what it means to you to start again conveys your nod of approval. This is going to be a positive step for you. The special part is the inherent hope with being "Excited about moving in a new direction." The key to success is to not look back. Comparing old to new, or setting old expectations to new goals would be repeating what you were doing. Not much new to expect there without just leaving it all in the past and forging ahead with new purpose without holding yourself back in your past way of doing things. There is one word to change from "its" to it's based on the order in which it is placed in your sentence. I wish you good luck in the new way you are approaching your new beginnings.
Write on!
tracker

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#1300305 by Maryann

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22
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Review of Promptly Poetry 5  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello AmyJo,

I wrote my entry before reading others and your "New Beginnings" is the first poem I read in the new PPC5 activity. You hit on so many points your new beginning looks like. One of the guidelines of setting goals is to be specific. "Smart choices" and "participate" are direct and to the point. That is what I liked most about your poem. It was written with conviction! The ending promise to be a "brave new world" in your neck of the woods was inspiring.

I recognize the free form style. The hyphen/line after "participate" stopped me cold. I don't think a break like that is helpful. I would use an exclamation point to give that line punch.

Good luck with your new beginning. Out with the old and in with the new sounds like a workable plan. Looking forward to more of your writing in our activity.

Write on!
tracker
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#1300305 by Maryann

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23
23
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Lobelia,

I found your portfolio while looking for trinkets. I browsed around and found "Ode to a Preschooler." I have a few thoughts after reading it I will share with you. I hope they will resonate.

I was engaged as I looked at this picture in your art folder. It linked me to this story of little Miss Miffed. From your wealth of adjectives, I felt like I knew her. The behavior at her party mirrors one by my daughter at her first party with school friends. They had a party game and my daughter was bent out of shape when she did not win. A hard part of growing up is pouting and trying to process a world that does not cooperate with your wishes.

The rhyme created a wonderful pace and rhythm. It begged to be read out loud. I loved it. All active words were chosen to paint this picture of how she acted and how it affected you. I read your portfolio description and saw the family photo. How wonderful to have raised your children and have the family expand with marriages and grandchildren. It is a wonderful life. I took to heart the final declaration that you "Can't resign."

After getting this far in the review, I read the poem again and caught the first line of each stanza and was glad I did. "Queen of Mean, Bear of Glare, Crone of drone, and Shrine of Whine are priceless.

It has been a long time since written, but is written as if her pity party happened last week. The activity has been removed and shows Invalid. If you choose, you could remove that link.

What delightful writing with so many things to choose from in your portfolio. You were lucky to have found WdC early on. I can see you are a gifted and prolific writer. I made a note to come back and visit again. I hope you keep on writing more things.

Write on!
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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama-It's a Party!

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24
24
Review of Remembered  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello fyn,

Some days we are meant to fall into a portfolio and find something that moves us. This just happened. I needed to read the words you put together to express what I have been feeling. "Remembered" is a well thought out and beautifully crafted free verse poem that resonates with me.

This line, "That the bits and pieces
of our lives are in someone's keeping?" says so much with few words.

The people you write about are indeed ones who many seem to forget, ignore, or just choose not to see. I want my children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren to remember our time together. I have written about my own life and shared individual stories with each of them. The homeless are concerning to me. Especially in the 110 degree plus weather here all summer. It honestly overwhelms me.

One suggestion that came to mind was the genre dark. It would encourage someone to read if that were exchanged for inspirational because that is what I deemed it to be.

Thank you for writing this. My compliments to you for a super well organized portfolio. It will be easy to find another piece to review. I will drop by again! Your poem inspired me to keep writing my memories which will be left for anyone who wants to read them.

Write on!
tracker

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GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama-It's a Party!

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
25
25
Review of Hot Pursuit.  
Review by tracker
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi ~SilverMoon~

I saw your request in Newsfeed for feedback on your "Pursuit" story. I am sitting here still smiling imagining the site of people trying to outrun turkeys. The best part is that it happened at the library's parking lot. I wonder if someone drops their book if they read a book. You wrote it as it happened. It seemed like a natural thing to discover turkeys in the parking lot. I laughed even harder when other turkeys showed up. The only thing missed, that would answer my curiosity, is how old your son is? Thanks for bringing attention to this funny real story. You can't make this kind of stuff up!
Write on!
tracker
Officially approved Writing.Com Preferred Author logo.
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama-It's a Party!

Image #1212681 over display limit. -?-


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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