That was so funny! It started out sounding as though it were a piece on war and instead surprised me by turning into a light-hearted, satirical story. I loved the descriptive wordage used. It were as if I were there with them, being terrorized as well. Quite the story. Funny, light, all-around excellent piece.
Quite well-written, this piece moves along quickly and yet doesn't leave you wondering. It gives you enough detail to picture the events in your mind but not so much to bog you down and take you away from the plot. The ending was a tad bit of a shocker which I liked as well. Good use of limited wordage. Keep up the good work. Hopefully, you have more out there for me to enjoy.
I am amazed and saddened and heartbroken and crying. I can hear the little girl pleading and begging her "Daddy". You did an amazing job on this one. Keep up the good work.
Wow. Somewhat dark, yet I feel it. I am not sure I would put this to music but then again I am a poet not a musician. The flow is a little off at the start and the finish; perhaps the lengthened stanzas are what really turn me away. But over-all it was a good piece.
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