I thought this story was pretty well wtitten. I was able to follow the story all the way through to the ending, without having to think hard about the intended comprehension, which I find is very helpful in being able to "feel" what feelings the story is conveying, or trying to express. I could almost actually feel the wind blowing in my face and hear it laughing at me, as if " I " was the one having the walk. Sort of made me want to throw a curse right back at the wind, to extend to it, the same curtesy as it did me, hehe. I did, however, see a small "typo", or misspelled word, that you might have missed on you revisement, and I'm curious about the double " that-that" which you used. I've wondered about if it could, or would be correct grammer, by using it that way ( that - that ), because I've found myself at times to feel the need to use it that way. I've also found, that more and more people, actually "like" or respect, when some writers write their stories as sort of on, or in, a day to day, or "personal" regular type of "conversation" I guess might be the word, type of reading. It's like they can comprehend it better, when we write in everyday normal conversational language, like they talk when they are at the house, without having to worry about someone trying to critique their conversation, grammer, word useage,etc. I for one, can misspell words, and use the wrong grammer or sentence structure, quite often, even with the spell check option, mainly because I sometimes get in a hurry to post.
Keep up the great writing. I liked what I read.
Randy. ( Z I P ) The Poetry Chef
I enjoyed this, thank you. |
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