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339 Public Reviews Given
342 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I'll comment about your story, characters, descriptions (narrative), and point out errors if you have any. I won't tear you down for small mistakes but I will point out anything I notice. I'm always polite in my reviews, I will do follow ups if necessary and I'll certainly be thorough if that's what you're looking for.
I'm good at...
Characterisation - I can instantly point out if your character's believable. And I can also help with show and tell if your story needs more balance.
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, science fiction, comedy, romance, mystery, action/adventure
Least Favorite Genres
Historicals and political stories without humour or a twist. Overtly long non-fiction too.
Favorite Item Types
Short stories *Heart*
I will not review...
Well, there isn't much I won't review. I don't mind horror and erotica (no matter how hardcore) as long as there's a meaningful story. Please note - I will not review a random, weird fantasy that makes me feel like a perv *Bigsmile*
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Poet : Vi Williams Author Icon
Poem : "That Beautiful Stranger Over There" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem describes heartbreak for a loved one you now consider a stranger. You narrate a lonely walk back to an empty house through the city, which seems all the more painful because of the memories and the future both of you once created together. Your heart is shattered, though your sanity remains, and it's all you can do to offer condolences to that beautiful stranger.

Your poem is an interesting take on a breakup. Stepping back from the immediate emotion, you show us the bigger picture of how you've come to view this person. You still long for this beautiful stranger, yet you've understood that you no longer know them as well as you thought you once did. I'm sure everyone has had a relationship like the one you've described here and because it's so relatable, what you've expressed will have both a profound and different meaning for different readers.

*BurstB*Imagery
The imagery in your poem comes mostly from the inner turmoil you feel. For the setting, I'd picture a cold night in a busy city - your poem gives me the vibe of being alone in a crowd. Your poem gets straight to the point in terms of the description - there's no two ways of interpreting what you feel because you're concise with your wording. The characterisation is typical of a person letting go of a loved one, a bittersweet experience at best, their emotions in constant conflict with their rationale.

*BurstB*Form

Rhyme - abbba cdddc
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

I feel in certain areas you're trying too hard to maintain the scheme. I'd suggest free form for the poem because of the subject and the freedom it requires to express it in full without being hindered by the rhyme scheme.

*BurstG*Style of writing
Straightforward, simple, easy to understand.

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
Walking home with wind blow - Tense. I know poetry is usually exempt from the strict rules of grammar applying to prose, but I feel at least the hook should be strong in this aspect. I could make suggestions, but that would mean tampering with your scheme - please play around with it a little and let me know if you need any help.

steepened my pace and I go slow - 'steepen' means to increase. Wouldn't you go fast if you increased the pace?

the cold of rain - Of is unnecessary here.

dare do not wish to purposely impose - Try I dare not wish to impose

I have no mind to attend my thinking - Here you abandon that scheme you work so hard to maintain throughout the rest of the poem. Try I have no mind to think clearly

It is almost as suddenly as if my soul has died - Try It is almost as if my soul has suddenly died

beautifulness of it all - Beautifulness doesn't sound right because you use 'beauty' a little later on. Try another word like 'glory' or 'splendour'. Feel free to experiment.

*BurstO*Favourite part
"I have no gut to speak for me
I have no heart to beat freely"

To me, this hit harder than any other part of the poem because it spoke to me deeply.

*BurstR*Final thoughts
I believe every poet has to dig deeper when it comes to writing - for literature so short in its form, the writer has to feel strongly enough for the words to come alive. Your poem was a good read and I liked that you've managed to convey your emotions with clarity. I hope to read more from you - welcome to the WDC community *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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2
2
Review of Madame Birch  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
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Poet : Annie Author Icon
Poem : "Madame Birch" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about Autumn. You show us the turn of the season in all its glory, portraying green leaves amidst golden ones. It's been quite a while since I enjoyed poetry about nature. Your piece had a subtle complexity and was very well written.

*BurstB*Imagery
This is the best part of your poem. The way you write makes me see things through the eyes of someone who truly loves nature and took the time, and more importantly, careful effort to craft a piece around this passion. The imagery was splendid and for a person who's never witnessed autumn, I got a nice mental picture from this piece.

*BurstB*Form
Free form
Devices - Alliteration, Assonance, Personification
Flow and coherence -*Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Elegant, high prose style

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
Other than a comma being required after "pressed pennies", I found none. Great Job! *Cool*

*BurstO*Favourite part
Madame Birch, if I may be so bold, where do you hide your silver
Beneath your cloak of green and gold?
Or will your precious secret remain forever hidden in its folds? *Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Yours is actually the first piece I've reviewed in months. Well, I have to say there was a really good reason to - you're an exceptional poet. You've done a brilliant job with this piece (and this is not just me being nice *Bigsmile*) You've got a lot of potential and this poem was an elegant, beautiful piece. Thank you for sharing and welcome to the WDC community.

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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3
3
Review of Can you?  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.5)
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Poet : Aiddy Author Icon
Poem : "Can you?" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about the small ways someone can hurt you. Ignorance can hurt just as much as words can, and every time someone doesn't notice how much you're in pain, you're left to question the love they have for you and if it's real.

Your poem had a simple theme but the emotion behind it is too deep for simple words. Pain just gets worse when it's not seen - perhaps it's time you confronted whoever hurt you and caused those tears.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your poem relied heavily on tell, seeing as you asked many direct questions. Yet somehow the way you asked them consistently with the same theme throughout conveyed the emotion of being hurt and not knowing what to trust anymore.

*BurstB*Form
Refrained and structured
Rhyme - abbba
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Simple, and easy to understand

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
Or your just I'd suggest using this alternative every time you have this refrain : Or are you just

are feeded...bleeded - "Feeded" and "bleeded" aren't words. Please use "fed" and "bled" and change the previous line to match the rhyme.

your sure - I think you mean you're sure

*BurstO*Favourite part
You hook (opening stanza) *Heart* *Smile*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem mustve been very emotional for you to write - I know this style of poetry has a name but it evades me at the moment because it's past midnight and I'm barely functional. Nonetheless, your poem was well written and I liked reading it - thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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4
4
Review of Death  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Poet : ShawnaHamm Author Icon
Poem : "Death" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is written from death's perspective. You mention how when he walks down the road everything around him dies. He walks into the house of a woman and takes her husband's life, the gram reaper come to do his bidding and take the man's soul.

Your poem, given the subject, shouldn't have been witty but it was. It was the subtle sarcasm you used that caught and held my attention. You're very creative to write this piece from death's perspective, but you've managed to keep things light which both surprised and delighted me. (I love dark humour. I'm twisted that way - can't be helped *Bigsmile*)

*BurstB*Imagery
Your poem painted death as a slightly bored, deadbeat (I know, not that punny...) character who didn't particularly enjoy his life as the Grim Reaper. He was likeable in a way, but also gave off the vibe that he'd much rather be doing something - anything - else right then. Your poem had enough descriptions to picture what was happening, but I'd suggest clarifying the penultimate stanza a little more for the benefit of your readers.

*BurstB*Form
Free form
Rhyme - Some rhyme, no set scheme (I figured there was one, but you deviate in too many lines to make it a proper scheme)
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Descriptive, engaging and immersive

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
inside is as quiet as a - the first "as" is not required.

women from insides sob - Seeing as you're abandoning the rhyme scheme altogether after a few lines, why not just write women sob from inside? because the way you've phrased things now gives off a slightly wierd vibe and different meaning.

its over I've - Please consider it's over...

Also, while I know a lot of poets who manage well without punctuation, your poem tells a story in which case punctuation becomes essential to separate phrases. Please consider adding punctuation to your verse.

*BurstO*Favourite part
Your grave humour *Bigsmile* *Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem was interesting and creative - bordering on dark but with a nice dash of wit to it. I enjoyed reading this - thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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5
5
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Poet : Pristine Poetic Author Icon
Poem : "Welcoming Committee...for Daddy" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is a tribute to your late father. You describe his descent into heaven to meet God and walk beside him. He might've left all the pain and sorrow of life on earth. but he wished for his family to join him in eternal life. Yet their time had not come yet, so here you wait, hoping that one day, you'll be reunited with your father.

Your poetry shows the deep connection you have with your family. You have my heartfelt condolences and regards. This poem went a step further into the imaginary side and you describe what happened after his death - it was an interesting concept, going beyond the pain of death and exploring the joy of the soul after that. I applaud your bravery to face your demons and look at them in a different light.

*BurstB*Imagery
This poem, unlike, the other one I reviewed earlier, went a little deeper as far as imagery was concerned. So I think the issue was with page space - experiment with lengthier poetic forms to give you space to explore your creativity. This poem again didn't focus on show, relying more on tell (in fictional terms). But it told a story successfully and I believe all good poetry will do that in one form or another.

*BurstB*Form
Free form (poetic prose)
Rhyme - Some rhyme, no set scheme
Flow and coherence - Please play around with this some more. There were areas that felt too short and long - rewording to make the meter consistent will improve this aspect.

*BurstG*Style of writing
Simple, clear and easy to read.

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
in the front line - Please consider on the front line

past-time - The use of "time" in the previous line makes this sound repetitive and it takes away from the flow. Please consider rewording it.

*BurstO*Favourite part
We also would face our own battle
And reach to God in great display
Of humbleness and gratitude

*Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem was beautiful and a great tribute to your father. I love the way you focused on the positive side of things - so many of us dive into dark poetry when faced with tragedy (and I'm not an exception to that either.) Your poem was optimistic and well written. Thank you for sharing *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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6
6
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Poet : Pristine Poetic Author Icon
Poem : "For The Best Mom On Mother's Day" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about your mother in celebration of mother's day. You mention that the love you have for is great and that she sets an example that you look up to. God's word shines through her and she's a woman of great love and compassion.

I think this is a wonderful gift to your mother *Smile* Your verse was short and sweet preserving an innocent, child-like tone which emphasises how much your mother means to you, even today. She's a very lucky woman, to receive such a sweet poem from her daughter.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your poem told us what your mother's love was like from your own eyes. As far as poetic devices are concerned, this poem is overtly simple - I'll admit this was a little too generic, in the way family tributes are. A little more imagery, or just complexity in your wording, would be effective, I feel. Please play around with it a little more until you're satisfied - who knows, the new updated version would make for a more elaborate and thoughtful gift even if it is presented a later date - it's the dedication that's behind it that matters, after all *Smile*

*BurstB*Form
Structured poetry
Rhyme - aabbcc
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Simple and easy to understand

*BurstO*Suggestions
is your number one. - Her number one what? Please consider rewording this as it interrupted your flow, which was otherwise very good.

*BurstO*Favourite part
Thank you for the love you bestow,
A heartfelt love that grows and grows.

Aww *Smile* That was very sweet *Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem had simple emotions and an innocent love that is touching. I'm sure your mother would've loved this tribute - very good job. Thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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7
7
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Poet : Victoria Victorious Author Icon
Poem : "Love, and then what?" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about what really happens in love, It doesn't last forever since we don't as humans live forever. We get old and weary - even love that was once exciting becomes lacklustre with time. If before there was a hollow stomach, now it's because of hunger. Before if there was perfection, now you need glasses and you still can't find it. When yesterday, he would've made you weak in the knees, today it's because your body is old.

I admit, I expected a different direction for your poem. When you meant love doesn't last forever, I thought you were going to talk about a break-up. It's an interesting concept exploring what happens when 'love' lasts but doesn't live anymore.

*BurstB*Imagery
I like the way you counteract the most common ways writers address love. The butterflies being set free was especially a good line. However the part about glasses and being weak at the knees threw me off a little. From your first two stanzas, I assumed this was young love - going to another age group was sudden - perhaps a linking verse to make the transition easier for your readers would be better.

*BurstB*Form
Free form
Rhyme - No set rhyme scheme
Poetic devises - Alliteration and Metaphors
Flow and coherence - Other than the rushed time line (which I mentioned earlier), the flow was good.

*BurstG*Style of writing
Simple and easy to understand.

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
They're just a reflection now, of where they've always been - Not only is this line abnormally long from the others in your piece, it's meaning didn't come through clearly. Please consider rewording it.

*BurstO*Favourite part
Eternity doesn't permit happiness
Just a fond memory

Quite cynical but it's true. *Thumbsupl*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem had an original and interesting concept. I liked your contradictions to love's proposals - nice to hear both sides of the story. It was a clever second perspective, years down the line in a relationship. Good job *Smile* Thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC.

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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8
8
Review of The Accident  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Author : Kim Author Icon
Story : "The Accident" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Story
Your story is about a woman who is rushed to the hospital by her friend. She's not told where they were going or what was the reason. Once at the hospital, she sees the family of the man she liked, mourning what happened to him. He seemed to be in an accident of some sort and he's suffered from extensive injuries. Although their relationship is complicated, the protagonist feels shaken and sad beyond the point of consolation. Despite her own emotions, she knows she has to toughen up and meet the man's family.

Your story is a work in progress and I believe this is a good start. It made me ask a lot of questions, so that's a good thing. Hopefully, these are some I'd need answered as a reader when you expand it : why was their relationship complicated and would he recover? I like that you've started this on mild suspense then gone on to some action then drama - a mix of genres is a good way to keep your readers interested.

*BurstB*Characters
The girl seems like the brave one - despite everything she feels, she still has a level head and she knows what to do, which is more than I can say for many of us when put in the same situation. Her character clearly showed love for the protagonist whether or not you intended it to - this scene told me that she had deep feelings for him no matter what the status of their relationship was. Are you sure you want to reveal your character's affection this early on in your work? Most romance writers wait a while to get the momentum of the plot going before they reveal the main character's emotions.

*BurstB*Descriptions and dialogue
I feel you could use a little more in this department - more show would certainly help. Your piece thus far focused mainly on what was happening and what she was doing rather than the setting and descriptions. For this genre, show matters almost as much as the plot, so please consider showing us more - descriptive passages that immerse the reader in your work are necessary to make the story move forward in a believable and good pace.

*BurstG*Style of writing
POV - First person
Tense - Past

Narrative, simple and easy to understand

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
Whats going on - Please consider what's going on

without having to be told - I think you mean without needing to be told

Susan & Sam - Occasionally, it's a good idea to use the symbol instead of the word. But if you want to sound professional, I'd suggest going the long way and using words.

*BurstO*Favourite part
The main character's determination *Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
This is a good start to your story - I'd love to see where you take me with this and how the accident is going to affect both protagonists' lives. I enjoyed reading this piece, thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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9
9
Review of She Waits  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Poet : That Short Girl Author Icon
Poem : "She Waits" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about a person. She's filled with rage to the bursting and she feels like anger consumes her. She is tired of hiding and waiting. She can no longer pretend to be calm as her emotions are rising like storm threatening to flood her. Some day, her calm exterior was going to break and the whole world was going to see the true person inside - you.

Your poem was on many levels true for me. I'm a very mild mannered person, or so people tell me. It's quite hard to keep emotions bottled up and your poem explained what it feels like to hold back certain emotions, like anger, which is easier said than done. I liked what you did at the end there - I expected it, but it was a good ending nonetheless.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your poem mainly focuses on the emotions you have - primarily anger. You describe anger as a storm under a calm surface and the comparison was good use of poetic imagery. I like the contrast you've used here of "jaded eyes" and "watching and waiting" to what is actually going on inside you - your poem reminded me of a panther ready to leap into action, a coiled spring of sorts threatening to break free.

*BurstB*Form
Free form
Rhyme - Complex without a set scheme. You write poetry the way I do - it wouldn't entirely qualify as free verse because there is rhyme. But as there is no set scheme to the madness, it doesn't read like traditional structured poetry - this gives you more breathing space to explore your creativity while preserving good flow.
Poetic devices - Rhyme, assonance and metaphors
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Descriptive, simple to read and easy to understand

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
brewing silently - The double usage of adverbs (-ly words) disrupts the flow. Please consider rewording it here.

I can too be - Please try I too can be

*BurstO*Favourite part
The ending and your descriptive endeavours *Heart* *Smile*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your piece was an interesting verse about hidden emotions - aren't they the most important, after all? What one is on the outside is but the tip of an iceberg and your poem drove that point home. I liked reading it, thank you for sharing. Welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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10
10
Review of Deception  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Author : pamela Author Icon
Story : "Deception" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Story
Your story is about a woman who visits her father in prison. She says she needs to get rid of her partner permanently because she suspects that he's having an affair or simply because he didn't take care of her well enough. She's asked to wait for her assassin and given a specific set of items by which to recognise him. Three days later when he finally comes to meet her, she finally finds out what her husband's job is. He's trained to kill and his client has become his new target.

Pamela, I have no words to describe what I felt after reading this. This is my favourite style of fiction - short stories, dead serious, with a really good twist at the end. Have you considered entering The Twisted Tales Contest - I'm sure you'll do well there. Despite the subtle pointers you threw in there, that ending threw me off and I had to read it once again, just to see how many bread crumbs you dropped *Smile* Overall, your plot development was very good and the twist was well executed.

*BurstB*Characters
This is the problem with couples - they just don't talk these days *Laugh* That woman should've just asked her hubby about what he was up to or perhaps followed him - that would've elicited a harsh response if she got caught, but surely not as much as ordering to get him killed. I like your antagonist - in my own twisted way, I found him a lot more likeable than his wife. Surely he was trying to protect her and no matter what she suspected (an affair or otherwise) she shouldn't have tried to kill him. Twisted karma? Oh yeah *Bigsmile*

*BurstB*Descriptions and dialogue
Your story is sufficient on this front for a short piece - if in the future you want to expand this, add more descriptions about the settings and such. You're like me in this respect - where twisted stories are concerned we tend to neglect the surroundings and focus on the plot. There's nothing wrong with only hinting at the background but if ever your muses feel you need to revise this, hit that department.

*BurstG*Style of writing
POV - Third person
Tense - Past

Engaging, plot centered and easy to understand.

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
"I've no idea dad and he's not going to be telling me.” - This line stops the good flow you had going. Consider "I've no idea, dad, and he won't tell me.”

There were some issues with punctuation - just typos but quite a few stood out where quotation marks ("...") were concerned. Please proofread once to correct for this. (Do feel free to mail me if you need help.)

*BurstO*Favourite part
The ending *Heart* It was too good for words.

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your piece was probably the best I've read today - I loved everything about it from the characterisation to the twisted what-comes-around-goes-around theme. Perhaps I shouldn't be saying this, but there's an important lesson to be taken away here - Talk to your hubby before you try to kill him *Laugh* Your piece was an enjoyable read, thank you for sharing *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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11
11
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
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Author : tnt410 Author Icon
Story : "The Least Redeeming Friendship Ever" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Story
Your story is about the events in your life that have taught you to be the person you are now. From an abusive relationship with your father to a horrible phase in your life with a drug dealer, you've chosen to take the high road. You've learned that the bed you've chosen to make was a life free from drug addiction. This opened your eyes to who you thought was your idol - even in death, he taught you that you'd made the right choice by picking a life without him.

*Salute* Perhaps it's my twisted perception of the world speaking, but I have a great deal of respect for people who can admit that they did drugs but found the courage to realise they were more worth than that. This story hooked me from the first line - you call things the way you see it and until now, I've only ever seen one person do that here (he's currently my best friend on WDC, I can throw in an introduction later on if you like.) I'll tell you what I told him - your style of writing feels real. You don't polish it up with pretty words, you call the shots the way they are and that makes for compelling stories in the dark genre.

*BurstB*Characters
Your character development was hopeful - I know it could've gone either way seeing all the cards you were dealt. Your character showed courage, not just from overcoming drugs itself, but from the little things. You didn't back down from your father's abuse, you tried to find the good in a very bad deal with a drug addict and even later on, after you see him for who he is, you still try to find good in him. This tells me your character is the kind that believes in optimism, though more like vague dream more than a reality. And that takes courage - to remain optimistic in the worst of situations demands great courage.

*BurstB*Descriptions and dialogue
Your story is autobiographical in nature. I'll admit my mind is wired to expect dry and lack lustre writing when I hear the word easy. Your hook cleared up any confusion in that department - you did a really good job of telling your readers this essay was going to be different. You don't go in-depth into any of the events but the way you describe them was what made me read on. You hit everything, even serious matters that require no smiles, with a tinge of sarcasm which makes it interesting for the reader.

*BurstG*Style of writing
POV - First person
Tense - Past

Descriptive, immersive, and engaging

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
had and still do I think you mean had and still don't

downs hair neatly - Normally, I'm not picky on punctuation but this paragraph (not just this line) lacked a few commas - please mail me if you need help proofreading.

jagged edge - Repetition of edge slowed down the flow here.

*BurstO*Favourite part
"Living well really is the best revenge"

Amen *Salute* *Smile*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your piece was an inspiring and hard hitting piece - you must've confronted quite a few old demons with this one. I applaud you for the way you write without flinching - your breed of authors fascinate me in that you deliver on the page with nothing holding you back. Thank you for sharing and welcome to our community.

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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12
12
Review of Silver Lining  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Poet : Miwli Author Icon
Poem : "Silver Lining" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about a conversation between two people who, I believe, are a couple. One feels pessimistic - he shouldn't reach for things they can't have and he feels that the heart grows weary of every blow and tries desperately to mend the broken pieces. However, his partner replies simply that it only makes the heart stronger in doing so.

Your piece was simple yet beautiful in its meaning. Indeed the heart breaks more than it heals, but every time we make the effort to mend ourselves, we grow stronger. Your poem had a lot of layers to it and I liked the contrast with the simplicity of it.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your hook had some great imagery and it served well to pull me into your piece. Your poem's atmosphere was one of sad longing - it was like the man wanted desperately to believe in love but his past failures held him back. The woman with that last line changed the tone of the poem and it ended the verse on a hopeful note.

*BurstB*Form
Occasionally rhymed, free form for the most part
Poetic devices - Metaphors and assonance
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsup*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Simple and easy to understand

*BurstO*Suggestions
on ears so deaf and And then she said - These two phrases didn't fit in well with the overall tone of your piece. Please consider rewording them.

*BurstO*Favourite part
The heart may break and heal again
but never it grows fonder

*Heart* Beautiful and true

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem was an interesting read about two different perspectives on love. I liked the way you've used simple words to convey a lot of meaning in this piece. I enjoyed reading this, thank you for sharing. Welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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13
13
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Poet : sara Author Icon
Poem : "Darkness be my friend " Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about your relationship with darkness. You want it in your life because everything else has abandoned you in a time of need. You mention that darkness reminds you of failures, but you'd much rather put up with it than being alone. Your friends may have left you, but darkness hopefully will never leave your side.

I'm going through a really rough time since my best friend's left me, not intentionally, but it still hurts. Your poem was relatable on so many respects because this is exactly how I feel right now - welcome to the dark side. While I know I should encourage you that life gets better, right now I feel it's probably the best company to keep.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your poem explained what you were going through - almost like a letter to darkness. I feel it could do a little more in this aspect - darkness is quite a common theme so most of us expect vivid imagery in this genre of poetry. We expect fear, emotion, desperation - anything you feel, you've got to make your readers feel. Your poem told me what you had experienced, but not exactly what you felt. Does that make sense? *Smile* Maybe you could expand the poem to show what darkness is in your mind, since we all have different definitions of it.

*BurstB*Form
Poetic prose
Rhyme - No rhyme scheme
Poetic devices - Alliteration and assonance (you can use comparisons to bring out your imagery)
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Narrative, simple and easy to understand

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
when your there - I think you mean when you're there

thats what I think - Please consider that's what...

When your gone - Try When you're gone

*BurstO*Favourite part
"When you're gone I'll be alone, the irony of that is wrong"

True. Sad but true. *Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem was dark in a way I didn't expect - it told me what was happening in your life. You've addressed this verse to darkness itself and extended an invitation - I found that creative. Thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC.

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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14
14
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello, Geoff Author Icon I'm reviewing your blog for "The Challenge" Open in new Window.

Your blog is always a place of fun for me *Bigsmile* You have a very interesting perspective of the world around you and your blog is well worth a read to explore your musings. My favourite would have to be your travelogue style entries, seeing as I love travel (something I've told you on numerous occasions, no less *Bigsmile*) I can't wait to hear of your recent journeys - you've been away for quite some time, professor. Hope you're returning with some interesting stuff *Smile*

Thank you for sharing and have a wonderful day!

-TG *Suitspade*


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15
15
Review of The Visitor  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Author : MK Author Icon
Story : "The Visitor" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Story
Your story is about a woman who misses her husband. She works hard the entire day with her household chores while her husband is far away. All she can think off is him and how much she wanted to be with him. Unfortunately she can't. But that night he returns home and he spends only a few hours with her sleepy self and she has wonderful dreams of them together. When she wakes up he's gone again and it's all she can do to be content with his cologne on the pillow.

Aww *Heart* Long distance relationships have that endearing way of breaking your heart yet pulling you closer to the other person. This story was very touching and realistic - I know quite a friends in a similar situation. It was very sweet towards the end that she contented herself with the smallest of things - it was a fitting ending to your plot line.

*BurstB*Characters
As far as characterisation goes, your protagonist came off as a hard working woman. From what you've said, she usually doesn't feel this desperate, but it still spoke a lot about her love for her partner when she regrets not picking up the phone sooner. It was the small things that made her character strong. Overall, she was a woman who accepted reality, no matter how hard it was to do so and she satisfy herself with the smaller things in life.

*BurstB*Descriptions and dialogue
For a piece of this length, the descriptions were just enough to tell me what was happening - in other words, you've relied mostly on tell (or plain narrative) to carry your story forward. May I suggest expanding this piece with more show? A little more description never hurt anybody *Smile* Towards the end, where you describe what happened in the morning, that would be a good area to include more show as it'll polish your closer.

*BurstG*Style of writing
Your POV is first person

Your style of writing was clear, simple and easy to understand.

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
In the first four paragraphs (minus the opening phone call), you use present tense. Then you suddenly switch over to past. Please correct this.
Also, I'd suggest proofreading once for punctuation. (Please mail me if need further help with this.)

*BurstO*Favourite part
That closing line *Heart* *Smile* It was beautiful and the perfect ending to your story.

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your piece was sweet, touching and emotional. The protagonist's desperation and her deep love for her partner showed through clearly - good job. Thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC.

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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16
16
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Poet : Mrs.Brightside Author Icon
Poem : "Oh How I Wish I Could" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is about everything you did to help your sister through her anxiety attacks. You listened to her talk, tried to make her smile and tried to inspire her in vain, hoping that one day, she'd return to the person she once was.

Can I say I relate to this entirely? My father suffered from anxiety and it's not easy seeing a person you love give themselves over to the disease. Your desperation showed through with this poem - you're a really good sibling.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your optimism was the most poignant part of this piece - yes, it was dark and depressing as well, but the way you mention that you did everything in your might was the most powerful aspect of this poem. At last, it was resignation, but even then it was a hopeful one - that you definitely would do anything, if it meant curing her.

*BurstB*Form
Free form
Rhyme - Occasional
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Narrative, clear and simple to understand.

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
I hear her say - I think you mean I hear her talk

Also, I'd suggest a proofread for punctuation. (Please mail me if you need help with this.)

*BurstO*Favourite part
I think to myself,
oh how I wish I could.

Aww *Heart*

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Your poem was deeply moving and beautifully written. The optimism you show in contrast to the darkness of her disease was a good contrast. Thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC.

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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17
17
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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Poet : orchiddragon Author Icon
Poem : "Lives In Posterity" Open in new Window.

*BurstV*Subject
Your poem is very open to interpretation, so I'll tell you what I understood about it. I assume this is about a relationship where one partner lies to fit in to society and their lifeless conformity brought the end of the relationship.

Your poem made me think - and I'm a big fan of those that manage to evoke thoughts and confuse me *Smile* There are many ways to interpret this poem - perhaps it may even be addressed to yourself. I found it an interesting read with its many meanings.

*BurstB*Imagery
Your poem had good poetic imagery. I especially liked the 'monotone' aspect. Why does the person die here, I wonder? Is that a metaphor for something else entirely or does it mean actual death?

*BurstB*Form
Structured poetry
Rhyme - aaaa bbbb
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*BurstG*Style of writing
Simple and clear phrasing

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
None I could find - save for the non-captilised 'i' (Please be careful about that kind of thing - while you're poetry is good, it takes a lot of credibility away when when we mess up the simpler things. Please proofread your work *Smile*)

*BurstO*Favourite part
Your heart, you sold
Just to fit the mold

*Heart* (Pun not entirely intended *Bigsmile*)

*BurstR*Final thoughts
Interesting poem - perhaps it has a philosophical undertone? The simplest ones always do though we may not often realise it *Smile* I liked reading this, thank you for sharing and welcome to WDC *Smile*

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Suitspade*

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18
18
Review of Never To Forget  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
A touching poem of love
Hopeful and beautiful
Yet now that it has gone
Sorrow resides, not for long
Cherished will be the memories
Never shall they leave.
Your poem was elegant,
Moving and true
For the ones we love may leave us
But they shall live forever in our hearts.

-TG *Suitspade*


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19
19
Review of Your Name  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
A patriotic verse
Inspiring self identity
One ought to be proud
Of their homeland's culture
Never to shy away,
Never to hide alone
Your poem was uplifting
Creative in both message,
Meaning and form.
Let's all be proud of our nations
Our names and ourselves.

-TG *Suitspade*


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20
20
Review of A stranger stands  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Poetry of a dark, macabre tale
Gripped me to read
What you offered to show -
A trip into your world,
Where a dark stranger awaits
Making you feel fear, hatred.
Dark thoughts surround your verse
A little polish I found lacking
Nothing much, a proofread
Of punctuation to complete
Your twisted nightmare
Spun from imaginary depths.

-TG *Suitspade*


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21
21
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Reviewing poetry with poetry
Your poem was about stars
And happy times long past
Interesting was your story
You told me of memories
Of dog days gone.
Beautiful was the imagery
Thoughtful emotions evoked.
You have such good talent
I'm glad to have read your work.

-TG *Suitspade*


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22
22
Review of GOOD STUFF!  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Author : Joy Author Icon
Title : "GOOD STUFF!" Open in new Window.

*Bursto*Story
Your story is about a man who is exceptionally unobservant about the state of affairs in his household. His wife dies and he's only notified of the fact nearly a week after her demise despite living under the same roof. Even after that, he's so out of it that when he's asked to finish the paperwork, he posts an add in the newspaper about his wife's possessions - now for sale.

*Laugh* This story was funny because I know a guy who acts pretty much the same way in real life - well, not completely but in certain ways, he's just out of it. It might sound fun watching him act like he has nothing on his mind for five minutes, after which his ineptitude comes back to slap you in the face. Your story was creative and humorous - great job with the plot line.

*Bursto*Characters
The man you just described - I felt he lacked a brain for some reason - he was incompetent every way, arrogant and ignorant all at once. I understand that it's near impossible to find someone exactly like this (idiocy comes in many shades and varieties - but this person is like all those shades were mixed in to create a murky indistinct colour.)

*Bursto*Descriptions and dialogue
Ample and sufficient - your tone suited this piece as well. It was simple and short, all the better to convey his slow thought process. Again, not a piece where excessive show is needed - this piece was balanced and read well just the way it is.

*Burstr*Style of writing
Your POV is first person
Your Tense is past

Clear, simple and humorous

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
from the Goodwill Industries. - "the" is implied and unnecessary due to the capitalisation.

There was some issue with the formatting that distracted me from reading during the wife's dialogue - please double space it or italicise that one dialogue seeing as that's the only one she has.

*BurstO*Favourite part
I always offer good stuff.

I bet he does *Bigsmile*

*Bursto*Final thoughts
Your humour is refreshing and creative yet it's simplicity is what makes your pieces shine. I liked reading this one - your protagonist was strongly developed albeit very stupid - I'm guessing that's the effect you were going for, so I'm happy to say you nailed it *Bigsmile* Thank you for sharing!

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Coingold*

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23
23
Review of Late to School  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Author : Andrew Author Icon
Title : "Late to School" Open in new Window.

*Bursto*Story
Your piece is about a boy who is woken up rudely to go to school. He falls asleep again and thinking that he missed the bus, runs all the way to school, sprayed with dirt and water from a passing car in the process. Once inside school, he's told that the bus was running late, much to his annoyance.

*Laugh* No, I haven't had this exact sequence of events happen to me, since I walked to school everyday. That kinda gives you practice to dodge when cars get too close to you during the rains *Bigsmile* Your story had a very ironic twist at the end which made it very amusing.

*Bursto*Characters
John's morning woes are totally relatable. I don't think I've woken up on time for school. Ever. *Laugh* The second time sleep session usually comes in during the first break (I'm in college now and that's still a hard habit to break), so it was probably a good thing that John did the noble thing and slept it off before school started.

*Bursto*Descriptions and dialogue
Seeing as this is flash fiction, I wouldn't stress on adding more show - besides I like the simplicity of this piece the way it is. A twisted story requires a simple premise to let the plot shine and I like that you've done exactly that in this case.

*Burstr*Style of writing
Your POV is third person
Your Tense is past

Clear, simple and easy to understand

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
None I could find, though I'd suggest proofreading once for punctuation.

*BurstO*Favourite part
Your plot twist *Heart* *Bigsmile*

*Bursto*Final thoughts
Ironic. Your story was humorous and witty with a well executed twist thrown in for good measure. I liked reading this piece, thank you for sharing - good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Coingold*

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24
24
Review of Alive In Death  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Poet : ~WhoMe???~ Author Icon
Poem : "Alive In Death" Open in new Window.

*Bursto*Subject
Your poem is about a person who feels like he's living a dead life. There's no hope or joy to be found in his existence and now he seeks to strip another of his identity and live life as another - the other person, it is revealed, is merely another part of himself. He wishes to change and become a new person.

I'll admit your note made a lot of sense and pushed this piece's genre rating to philosophy in my head. If it weren't for that, I would've assumed the said person's an identity thief or a ghost trying to claim another's body (especially since you say "alive in death".) Your poem is in my favourite genre so my views are probably going to be a tad bit biased *Smile*

*Bursto*Imagery
At first, very dark and that's what held my attention. There were a lot of elements from the horror genre like the comparisons to a "dungeon" and "rotting flesh". Then you mention that the person wished to become another by stealing their identity and here we see the cunning side of the protagonist. (Of course, this illusion continues until you reveal that he's merely trying to become another person on his own and not actually stealing anything.)

*Bursto*Form
Structure poetry
Rhyme scheme - abcb defe
Flow and coherence - *Thumbsupl*

*Burstr*Style of writing
Dark, descriptive and gripping

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
None I could find *Cool*

*BurstO*Favourite part
The last quatrain *Heart*

*Bursto*Final thoughts
Your poem is was enticing in a dark, twisted way and it compels the reader to follow through if only to satisfy their morbid curiosity *Smile* I like your style of writing - you have simple, yet powerful phrasing. Thank you for sharing!

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

- TG *Coingold*

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25
25
Review by Tiger Cub 🔱 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Author : ~WhoMe???~ Author Icon
Title : "Seasons Come and Seasons Go" Open in new Window.

*Bursto*Story
Your story is about a day out hiking. The sun is shining and everything is cheery until suddenly the sky darkens and a storm approaches. The snow pelts down hard and the wind blows but the chaos is over almost as soon as it began and you're left to wonder whether you imagined the whole thing. Perhaps it was true that seasons come and go, but some maybe reluctant in their departure.

Your story reminded me of that one time when we were driving out of town. The clouds chased our car *Smile* It was sunshine in front and a wall of rain right behind our car - it was almost unbelievable. Seasons are unpredictable and your story showcased the powerful whims of Mother Nature.

*Bursto*Characters
This piece didn't focus much on the characterisation, so I won't go in depth here. Summer was portrayed as a vibrant, kind woman while winter was shown as a reckless, unstoppable father.

*Bursto*Descriptions and dialogue
Your descriptions were beautiful and elegant. Your hook really pulled me in - I like that you establish the scene early on to orient the reader given the dynamic state of scenery in this piece. Your personification of the seasons also polished up your tone, delivering a poetic finish to your story.

*Burstr*Style of writing
Your POV is first person
Your Tense is past

Descriptive and narrative

*BurstO*Errors/Typos
In that instance - I think you mean In that instant

Also, I'd suggest proofreading for punctuation.

*BurstO*Favourite part
"Seasons Come and Seasons Go". Maybe though, they didn't all like to leave.

Very true *Smile*

*Bursto*Final thoughts
I wonder if you intended this piece to have a deeper meaning with that last line - it was near poetic in its delivery. Perhaps it symbolises the hardships in life, perhaps it doesn't - whatever be the case, your story had vivid scenery which I loved. Thank you for sharing!

Good luck with your writing and have a great day!

-TG *Coingold*

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