Well written piece that articulates your thought process, efforts, and solutions brilliantly. However, I feel the length could have been shorter and the article a bit more crisp with a little bit of fine tuning. Nevertheless, I totally enjoyed reading this brilliant piece. Thank you.
I wondered for a minute there as to what I'd sorely missed all these long days and reading this piece reminded me of the uplifting feeling on a good read, a story well told, a feeling beatuifully expressed.
A very important article and nice piece of writing. You have touched on the salient points. It is well written as well as being encouraging and inspiring. It is indeed necessary that we focus on the "right frame of mind".
My friend, after a long draught the promise of water is itself refreshing even if there is no water ... every destruction leads to construction ... all death leads us to look forward for life ... if not for this then today there would not be the Voyager etc., searching for life (water) on Mars... in the belief that Mars was once like Earth...
Too good to see your amazing progress and your wonderful port ... kudos!
I can relate to this poem; the extrinsic as well as the intrinsic meaning there, the metaphor, the meter... the leaves make it more relevant ... a truly enligthening expression ...
It is tough not to give this poem a second and a third reading.
This is the reason I relate to your poetry and admire it so much. Axilea, you have a rare and wonderful treasure trove that brings forth the profoundest of thought in the most abstract yet sweetest of verse.
I salute the uniqueness of the poetry that flows forth from your wonderful spirit.
This is such a wonderful poem. So surreal. Leaves one with a feeling in the end that it indeed was not a dream but abject reality. But the reality has such a dream like enchantment.
Wonderful.
Bests,
Sarah
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Amazing form and flow, and I loved the whole theme. You can rest assured, you are going to climb the poetic highs. I can say it, though I am no great shakes as a poet or as a writer, but as a mere connosieur of poetry who loves the poetry of T.S. Eliot, and the likes of Elizabeth B. Browning.
You have loads and heaps of talent, young rising star! It was a pleasure reading, rating and reviewing this piece from you.
Excellent item!
Some suggestions:
Making me feel in-slaved --> should "in-slaved" be "enslaved"
I’d be to scared to give them what they deserve --> I'd be "too" .....
You can not --> you "cannot"
One other thing, the stanza that starts with "They give you dirty looks for smiling," is different with the connotations to "you" rather than the constant refrain of "I" in the rest of the poem. May be you should take a second look at it.
This is a PORT RAID REVIEW for the WDC Angel Army. First of all let me wish you peace, happiness and a lovely new day.
I liked the repetition of the first 2 lines in the last stanza, as the first stanza begins with the firefly's introduction to you and the poem ends with your wish that it should never put the fire out
Showing me what life’s about -> would the addition of "all" between "life's" and "about" have been appropriate, if not, please don't mind me
Army. First of all let me wish you peace, happiness and
a lovely new day.
"What could have been" is a haunting question and the daunting thing is, there are no answers for such questions, no satisfactory answers
life makes us wonder about the choices we make and a someone lost (loss of life) due to a choice that we make, is something that keeps us wondering, what if we had'nt made that choice, but then I wish life would allow us to change that one moment, that one choice.
I wish one could go back in time and redo the whole thing again, but I am sure that irrespective of the consequences, we would still do the same thing in the same manner once again. Cause at that time, we cannot predict that life would deal such a cruel blow.
This is my HUM Port RAID Review. First of all let me wish you a very beautiful day and happiness. What a beautiful setting and your words pour in just like the sunlight streaming across the green glades of grass that cover the landscape.
The whole poem flows so smoothly and reminds me also of a small lake whose waters are lapping the sand shores
A perfect setting for memories of fondness and loved ones touching your soul in tenderness
The parallels you draw with the last stanza bring the poem to a silent breath of memory
A wonderful job!
Bests, Sarah
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This is my HUM Port RAID Review. First of all let me wish you happiness and joy forever. God! this poem reminded me of AKira Kurosawa's "Rhapsody in August," the A-Bomb, the mushroom clouds and Black Rain.
The whole setting, scenario was superbly crafted.
Very powerful imagery.
Bests, Sarah
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This is my HUM Port RAID Review. First of all let me take this opportunity to wish you grand success, delight, joy and good cheer forever. This is an amazing poem that is so true to our life, and our journey.
The spiritual odyssey, journey and the quest are eternal for some of us. One does not rest in the inner sphere unless one has encountered it in complete measure. Cause what we look for is within us, around us and surrounds us.
I am glad that you have found that friend, that spiritual companion who has opened up a new dimension to your journey. So now no more, lonely journeys my friend.
An amazingly soothing and calming poem that encourages to believe and restores faith in how a questing spirit will find another like minded spirit. Perhaps, it is this that they say "kindered spirits"
A beautiful enlightening poem.
Bests, Sarah
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Here is a tribute to yet another horse lover and one who is evolving day-by-day into an amazing poetess/poet
You remind me so much of my good ol' friend in MN, whose home is filled with horse pictures and whose horse was the love of her life
I just can imagine how a young girl would have felt seeing the golden brownies and the black beauties
The poem is highly imaginative, wonderous and captures the wonder, utter fascination, stupendified amazement, all these expressions
I am totally enamored by the scent of this poem. Can feel a light breath of the horse smell!
Love and Bests, Sarah
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I could feel the impact of each and every line in this poem "Alone". The line "decapitating like petals" and the lines preceding it, convey such depth of pain and emotions for that little girl.
The next lines however, throw up some hope or possibilities that could arise with sun and the spring.
A truly exceptional poem because it makes use of such powerful language
Never believed it when people said that the word could be so powerful, but now I have to revise my opinion after reading this commendable effort from you.
Bravo!
Sarah
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It is simple to say that I simply loved the verses, but I would just like to say simply that the first stanza was simply superb! Brilliant!
The first 2 lines of the stanza 2 are so tenderly crafted. Probably it is the dual "ands" in the last 2 lines that make the difference ... but they too have a voice of their own.
A beloved friend of mine pointed me out to this writing of yours and I was hooked from the word go. You have a style all your own that is effervescent and smooth.
Is that "latch to" or "latch on to"? Just a question to educate myself.
Good job!
Bests,
Sarah
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Cool poem, odds are that I had fun, nah, much fun. Rhyme well and convey the perfect meaning.
Just a few suggestions:
- Worth mentioning thats been --> .... that's been
- have meet a girl --> have met a girl
- Odds a rejection --> (question: is that odds are or odds a)
A friend pointed me out to this poem of yours, and I somehow for an undefined reason got hooked to the verses in this poem. I read it and reread it. Let me only comment on the meaning. It has captured my nihilist tendencies, it's got a strong viewpoint and makes for a good thoughtprovoking poem with the symbolism.
Good job!
Bests,
Sarah :: Member of the following forums::
***WDC Angel Army***
***RAOK***
***A Day in the Life***
***Hummingbirds***
***Rising Stars***
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