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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/shinichi
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21 Public Reviews Given
118 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by nanausakidesu Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
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#1305931 by It's too hot already! Author IconMail Icon


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*Note*My thoughts/feelings:
This just reminded me of someone. I think the person in this piece was not able to experience how it was to love and be loved back in a sincere way that was why he searched and longed for it. He just cannot find Love because he was blinded or probably he looked for it at the wrong person or place. If I would relate this to others, some though would look for it from material things.

I felt that he was a lonely person who blamed God because there was no love in his life, and he associated love's non-existence with the miserable things he had experienced. I sympathize with him for he gave me an impression he was lost and started to drift into the dark.

If I will have the chance to talk to this man, I will tell him that love and God goes hand in hand. If he welcomes God in his life, I feel that love will blossom too in his life. I also feel that this special gift has to start within him before he expects it from others. If he does not have it, he cannot give it.

*Note*My suggestion/s:

*Note*My comment/s:
A reflective poem which questions love's existence from the point of view of a man who seemed not to experience the happiness behind this special gift. He also then started to believe that God did not made Love for him.

Thank you for sharing this piece!

Keep on writing!

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Review of My Star  Open in new Window.
Review by nanausakidesu Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
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#1305931 by It's too hot already! Author IconMail Icon


*Note*Hello! I am a participant of "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. I dropped by to read, rate and review your piece. This is my simple way to give you encouragement and motivation in your works. The comments and suggestions given are not intentionally made to offend you dear writer.*Note*


*Note*My thoughts/feelings:
I think the narrator of the poem just broke up or got separated with the one he/she loves. I understood in this piece that what was left between them was their memories and past love. He/She was on his journey again to find his/her 'star,' the person meant for him/her and the one who will bright up again his/her life.

*Note*My suggestion/s:
I read that you were not sure where you want to place your punctuation marks. I would just like to give some suggestions:

I found my glimmering star one day,
But even the brightest fizzle away.
The only things left;
We bury inside.


*Note*My comment/s:
I like this part: "And new stars will need finding."
This is a love poem that can help inspire a brokenhearted person to love again.

Thank you for sharing this one!

Keep on writing!

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Review of Treasure  Open in new Window.
Review by nanausakidesu Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)


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WDC Frontliners Discussion Forum Open in new Window. (E)
A group that aims to motivate and encourage fellow authors to write on. Come join us!
#1305931 by It's too hot already! Author IconMail Icon

*Note1* Hello! I dropped by to read, rate and review your work. This is my simple way to give you encouragement and motivation in your works. The opinions and suggestions given are not intentionally made to offend anyone. *Note1*



*Check5* My opinion/s:
I think the word "treasure" has a lot of symbolism in this poem. I think it can be a love or a relationship which you are not sure of if it just existed as a memory, and you might have suppressed it because of your sad experiences, leading you to just consider it as a dream.

The stanzas that described the "treasure" can be understood easily. Your "simple little" poem as you have described it, has something meaningful to convey.

I like this part:


And in trying to change it,
Alas--it broke!


This may be a short stanza, but if I will read it more than once, this part makes me remember some thoughts and emotions on matters about love and relationships.

I like this poem because it is reflective. ^_^

Thank you for sharing! Keep Writing!
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