Very moving with some brilliant imagery. I adore the first verse such decisive words and then the so perceptive word pictures of the old folk. I saw this via the Troubadors blog and am really pleased I stopped by to read it. It should do well in the competition. Congrats on a really moving poem.
Hi an interesting read which as you say in your notes has been interpreted in different ways. When you finish it you feel the need to look at it again. It's well written and leaves you wondering and wanting more.I shall certainly have a look in your port for other items. Esperaza.
Hi another excellent piece of history. You obviously have a very good memory and are able to put into words an account of your childhood which is both informative and easy to read. As I said about your piece on Threshing day this is social history which I believe has a relevance not only for your own family but for society as a whole. I hope that your work will find a wider audience as I think that such innocent fun is sadly missed today. Keep up the good work. Esperaza.
Hi I was very interested by your description of Threshing day. Not far from where we farm in France each year sees a bygone years farming day. One of the highlights is the amazing threshing machine which gives working demonstrations throughout the day. So I can understand how impressed you must have been by the real thing. What would also be interesting would be some sort of timescale, when were you actually able to watch this and do you know how long this went on for until it was superceded by combining. These memories are to my mind very important not just for your family but for communities aswell. Well done for a piece of history. Esperaza.
Hi this is an interesting short story. I think the only criticism I would make is in the name you use for the monsters, this is of course a personal choice but to my mind it does not sound like the type of evil beings you describe. I feel it detracts from the impact of your story. Of course this is only my opinion and such things are the perogative of the author. Good luck with all your work. Esperaza.
Hi I have rated this as a 5 star because I can empathise with you, but remember you are only as old as YOU feel. Don't worry about anyone else. You have so much more to feel good about than all these young things with no experience. My children are in their early thirties and I still consider myself young [at heart atleast] and so should you. Just think of all the great things you can write about other than "middle age". Consider your glasses as a fashion accessory and GO FOR IT. Good luck from a young at heart Esperaza.
Hi I can understand why this story did well in a contest. The whole piece reads very well and holds your interest. There are a few spelling mistakes which it would be worth correcting just because they detract very slightly from the overall impression which is excellent. It definitely makes me want to read some more of your work. Esperaza.
Hi I enjoyed the first chapter of your novel. I wouldn't normally read a Western but I get the feeling that this is not going to be a usual style western. I would just point out that in one or two places I think that your ideas have probably run away with you and if you read it through again you will spot a few errors. I wasn't sure about using "nearly" twice in the first sentence and is the name Alvin a mistake in the last paragraph. I do like a lot of the imagery you use and will be interested to see how the main characters develope. I shall definitely read on. Well done. Esperaza.
Hi this has to be perfect because its how you remember your Annabelle. You have expressed some of the ways of a Basset, I know because I have "owned" many and still have one who is Mist's friend. It's never easy to say goodbye and you have given her a lovely tribute.Well doneand I hope the GP's help. Esperaza.
Hi as a very non expert horse rider I can empathise with all of your experiences.It never ceases to amaze me at the number of monsters you can encounter and thats before leaving the yard. It makes for a very funny read. Thanks for sharing your stories and I shall definitely check out other items in your port. Esperaza.
Hi what a brilliant piece of poetry. Actually more than a poem. Some of the imagery is striking. I love the idea of "mud slowly creeping into everything that Spring" what a really great opening line.I also enjoyed the easy language.The final line with it's matter of factness seems to epitomize the stoicism of country folk. A really good read,thanks. Esperaza.
Hi when I read your poem it seemed to me that it would make good lyrics for a song. A fairly simple poem but suggestions in some of the lines of more to come. I thought "put on a face that has no fear" was particularly strong. Keep up the good work. Esperaza.
Hi Hooves your athletisism doesn't fail to amaze. Is there no end to your talent? Your friend looks a little overwhelmed by the effort but you are a natural. I just hope that some of my sheep will be encouraged to follow in your hoof prints. Keep up the good work. Esperaza and friends.
Hi the good news is that with every word you write you grow so that already you are less small.What a fertile imagination you have to make something big out of small.Well done and keep it up.Esperaza.
Hi I thoroughly enjoyed your adventures in Venice,it definitely made me want to visit although I'll give the creativity course a miss.A great sense of humour stands out and some beautiful descriptions of Venice without using cliches which must be difficult for somewhere so often written about.Hope you made it to France for the "Grand Boucle" .Esperaza.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/sheepish
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 1:30am on Nov 24, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
