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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/rochelle2001
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Review by Rochelle Pitt Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
I'm assuming that this story is an excerpt from a much bigger story, and I'd much like to read more! :) Your use of vocabulary is astounding, and your descriptions definitely paint a picture for the audience. However, I did catch some minor typos. There were a couple of fragmented sentences in the first 2-3 paragraphs, and you have "Lava Spiders" capitalized in one paragraph but not in another. I apologize if I sound like I'm being nitpicky, but I want fellow writers to have their works look and sound as neat as possible. Anyway, I love where this story is going, and I really would like to read more of your works!
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