Welcome to the site. I enjoyed the poem, Your writing style boarders on the abstract allowing for an easy flowing read. You have painted a picture with words allowing the reader to have true clairty as to the scripts meaning. The negative about the poem is that it is far to short, I found myself wanting more and not getting it . Your ability to put pen to paper is outstanding, and to answer your question in your Bio, Yes you can.
Super job, Keep Writing, I look foward to your next submission,
Regards
SidCat
Not one of my favorites, very rough read,I found your writing style boring, distracting the reader from the main point of the script, your attempt at toughness is extremely transparent, and unbeleiveable. I couldn't find any true clairty in the message, to me it was just words thrown together saying nothing. I quess some people like this type of poem and some don't, I chose not too. Good luck with future submissions.
SidCat
Welcome to the site. Nice poem,I enjoyed reading it. I thought the poem was extremely honest.
You have the ability to paint a clear picture of the thoughts you are trying to present.
I did however find the script somewhat chopy, too many unnecessary words, creating a difficult read in places. Your attempt at rhym is nice but in my opinion the flow is not there.
I find your writing style to be open and sincere, Good Job.
Keep writing, I look foward to your next submission,
Regards
SidCat
Nicely written poem. I enjoyed your writing style, very simplistic and open. You managed to get your message across in a very honest and sincere way. The visual image left in the readers mind is one of comfort and respect. and I think the world needs more of this type of writing.
Good job, the only negative point I have is the length of the script, I wanted more, I beleive with a little effort you could have provided it.
Keep writing and I look foward to your next submission
Regards,
Sid Cat
A for effort, I liked the poem,all those first emotions when setting pen to paper for all to view. I enjoyed your writing style in it's simplicity, you created a vision where one could feel the thoughts of the writer. The poem left one wanting more, I think with a little more effort you could have achieved this. Great start, keep writing ,I look foward to your next submission
Regards
Sid Cat
I think I liked the poem ,not sure. In critiquing a poem I try to get inside the writers mind to find clairty in the message being portrayed, having difficulty. The visuals are great, just can't figure out what your trying to say, made me re-read the poem numerous times, I love a challenge, good job, I look foward to your next submission.
Keep on writing
Sid Cat.
I enjoyed the poem even though I found it a wee bit of a difficult read. The rhym seemed broken in places, causing me to lose my concentration and ability to focus on what the primary message of the script was.
I did enjoy the visual immagery, it brought a clearness to the picture that the writer was trying to present.
Overall it was a very good poem, the only tip for improvement I would suggest would be to work on your rhym fluency.
Good work ,keep writing, I look foward to reading your next submissiom.
Sid Cat
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