simple, beautiful, though could use some improvements. personally, I would add more rhythms to it. but given how simple your choice of words and structuring is i would say this shows a decent level of honesty, which is perhaps what adds to its beauty. keep writing, and i hope that should you have a reunion it would be soon, and should you stay apart from your loved one then may it be for the best, and may what is to come be better.
well written, and a familiar writing style which makes it even more interesting to me. been a while since I've seen a beautiful imagery such as this. the only "complaint" I might have is the emoticons, for me they tend to draw attention away a little from the lines, but overall beautiful, keep writing like this.
i like it, for something you wrote on a whim it's a good start. in future poems try removing the numbers, you know those 1) and 2) etc, as well as the "END" part. for me they make a poem less engaging, and a poem is like that one type of writing you want to be engaging the most. and as for the title well how about "the present of present". or maybe it sounds dull XD? anyway, for a teen this is a nice start in poetry, and i hope you give that genre more attention, it's a relaxing way of expression: like venting out but also challenging yourself to do it elegantly. may you have a peaceful life my friend.
it sure is delightful, though the rather biblical words threw me off a bit since I'm not used to seeing them (English is not my first language after all). but overall, I liked the way it's written. wish you well in future writings.
beautiful. if i had to make a modification it would be adding a few more lines. mainly to describe just a little more the moment of the rainbow appearing. from experience i got to know that detailed scenery can leave a deep impression on kids which helps with teaching life lessons early on. keep up the good work
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/release
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 12:37am on Apr 09, 2025 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
