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Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/psychomantis
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4 Public Reviews Given
5 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by Psychomantis Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
I think this is a very good start to your book. Your description of everything, from the winter night to the silent intruder, was very good and gave just enough to interest me but not too much that I became bored with detail. I must admit that I wanted more when I reached the end, so I am looking forward to reading more of this story. The only thing I think I could suggest would be to condense the references about the fact that he's not there to steal. I think just mentioning once that he didn't come for trinkets would streamline your story a little and give your character more concern and trepidation for what he's presumably about to do. Great job, hope you keep writing and thank you for letting me read your work.

-Psychomantis
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Review of X-Saga I  Open in new Window.
Review by Psychomantis Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
I think this is a very good start to the story you want to tell. I found your characters believable and I'm really very interested in learning more about the society and why interfering with death is so bad. I'm also not sure where this will lead which is a good because I hate reading something and being able to predict exactly what's going to happen. The only real thing I'd like to point out is that I thought it was a little short and I think having more build up to the conclusion could create more tension. Thank you for letting me read this and I hope you keep writing.

-Psychomantis
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