This is well written. I recommend the correct use of quotation marks in dialogue though:
Example
"You good in there?" Yes I am, I replied.
Should be "You good in there?" "Yes I am", I replied.
With this being "Part 1" I trust that the main purpose of part 1 is to introduce the loving couple and set the scene for much to come.
Well written piece. A "twist in the tail" would have been a bit more satisfactory though. Maybe Mr. Henderson could have incorporated Alex's material into a revised learning plan with much success??
What a lovely piece.
The relationship between two people of different generations demonstrates true friendship without any other connotations.
Arthurs expression of his need for Emily to remember him tells of a deep longing in hi heart to be loved, maybe because he was badly let-down by someone in his life before he met Emily.
- Attention must be paid to some language i.e. use "four" instead of 4, "fill" instead of "feel".
- It's not good where "ship" is repeated in two sentences to get something to rhyme.
Short and sweet though very powerful in the deeper sense.
After some of our wishes do materialize into our realities if we keep believing in: "the sky is the limit".
The language and composition of this article is impeccable.
The abuse of our planet by the human race is indeed a matter of concern and not necessarily a cause for us to be "scared".
"Our role in the Universe is dubious".... This could stated as "The impact of the Human Race on the Universe is dubious" while our role is what we were placed here to do i.e. "take care of creation"
I enjoyed getting some insight into your views and concerns regarding matters involving the abuse of Mother Earth and the Universe. We can only trust that the numerous forums that preach against this flourish in their successes.
Hi Hardii,
This is indeed filled with true emotion. While reading the poem I could sense that it was heartfelt. I think that the "Maiden" will fall deeper in love with you when she reads this.
This an excellent alternative perspective. After all there is always more than one angle to every situation...
I like the wolf's equation of himself to Santa because the chimney.
The wolf's language is not all that pure, but that can be forgiven because the wolf himself is bad after all.
This is an excellent article that really offers good insight that can be used, not only to engage in relationships, to start practicing in existing relationships.
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/pietpatat
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.09 seconds at 1:41pm on Nov 21, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
