Dear Sabankat,
I'm not sure I fully understand the meaning behind this poem, no matter, it flows off of the tongue nicely. I especially like "A path controlled by individuals, undaunted by fear." I like that the poem doesn't rhyme. the meter alone, causes it to move along nicely. Keep writing.
Blessings, Patty
This poem says a lot. I realy like the line "Death, mere words can not relieve." you're right the pain will eventually set you free, as crazy as that sounds. I once lost a dear friend to a sensless car accident, it was the first time I truly greived, and it caused me to grow in ways I cannot explain. I actualy believe that I am better for it, and you will be too. I'm sorry for your loss, but keep writing it's a great way to process your feelings, and good poetry emerges from intense emotion.
Blessings, Patty
I enjoyed this poem my favorite line is
"I dare not cover the brand you placed upon my body
so I will never lose sight of who you made me to be"
It is quite true that when someone hurts us they brand us, and change us forever. I'm glad to see that you realized that forgivness is more healing to the giver than the recipient. Nice work, Keep on writing!
I thoroughly enjoyed this piece, it was brilliant and funny. It's amazing how your perceptions change on the day after, Especially when alcohol is involved. I too am a member of your club, my first kiss was a klunker forced on me by a boy I didn't much like. It was on the deck of a cruise ship and I avoided him for the rest of the trip. Anyway, welcome to the community and keep writing. Your story was a pleasure to read.
Blessings, Patty
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