I have read this a few times now, trying to understand the meaning. It goes beyond your needlessly short lines. Far past the attractiveness of your seemingly rampant nationalism. I struggle to find a shining light in this work, something to redeem it. Truthfully, there is none. It is not funny, edifying, or thought-provoking. It is, however, mean-spirited and poorly written. I wish I could give you some advice to improve upon this work, but I'd have to say that the only way you could do that would be by writing something entirely different.
I liked the "stream of consciousness" feeling this piece gave me. The lack of consistent structure isn't a turn off, but more of an allusion to how an intense romance lacks consistent structure.
The truth about anything divine is this; all of the most beautiful things have unsatisfying endings.
I like the idea behind this poem. I can tell it comes somewhere from the heart. It's interesting, when something seems so tragic as to tear your life apart, yet you look outside and it doesn't even have the decency to rain.
Nature be not decent. It cares not, worries not. The only thing you can really improve on here is just using words that more precisely encapsulate your emotions.
Don't be restrained. Let it all out.
I really liked this poem. Nature is one of the most powerful and inspiring forces the human mind is exposed to. While this just describes natures event, it is still beautiful in that there is a constancy associated with the flower.
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