Very enjoyable piece to read, I found myself with mental images of the situation you describe.
A bit of a grammer mistake I noticed: when you say "and he does not seem like cares" this needs a *he* in there before cares. Or you could say *and he does not seem to care*
And the very next line seems to be mis-worded... (< if mis-worded is a word lol)
Anyways... I knew what you meant and enjoyed reading the piece.
The only time I ever write my poetry is when I am thinking and I just write stuff down... This piece makes me want to maybe try writing something more simple that doesnt rhyme...
Well thanks for shareing :^)
Peace.
This is a very interesting piece of writing. I know what you mean as I have an iphone and all of my poems i've written have been done on it. I actually turned off the spellcheck setting because I found it annoying when trying to text friends... I totally get what you're saying tho!
Peace.
Jake.
Omg this is absolutely AMAZING!!! i feel like i could have writen basicly the exact same thing if i had the skill that you do...
Seriously reading this really touched me, i could totally feel what you are going through! I would like to be able to give you some advice on all of this.. But im in the same situation as you are and i basicly feel lost, not knowing whats important or who i am anymore...
This has really inspired me to write somewhat of a break down on what im going through and maybe step aside from the poetry for a minute.
Thank you so much for sharing such a deep and amazing piece!
Thanks again also for reviewing my work, im really glad you liked it :^)
stay strong and keep writing!
Peace and love.
Jake.
This is a very nice piece. I think everyone should have someone like that, that they can call their BEST friend.
A few spelling mistakes- on the first line where you say- “ year " i think you mean *years* plural... And when you say “ I ever find out anyone huts you" im pretty sure you meant *hurts*
But ya its a nice piece, im sure your friend is very lucky to have you.
Peace. :^)
Wow you are clearly an amazing writer... Your writing inspires me to maybe start writing some stuff that doesnt rhyme... Altho i like to rhyme..
Only one mistake that i noticed... In the line “In a smootly swaying hammock" i think you meant to *smoothly*
Exellent piece :^)
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.06 seconds at 4:46am on Nov 08, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
