A lot of people could relate to this. You meet someone, see something good in them. And as the relationship deteriorates, you cling to that hopeless memory, as if you can simply will it into being by bearing through the madness and sorrow.
You grasp emotion rather well in this piece, and as stated above, this relatable piece is short, simple, and easily enjoyable. It appeals to something deeper than the breadth of the reader's imagination.
I will say this - I don't sense 'angry' in this at all. Loneliness, sure. A grim resolve, certainly. Resigned to the inevitable, but I don't sense 'angry' anywhere - perhaps a few lines denoting arguments and (God forbid, of course) some sort of abuse sustained could lend to the title?
Other than that, good solid work. =]
Printed from https://writing.com/main/profile/reviews/obryant
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.09 seconds at 4:01am on Nov 24, 2024 via server WEBX2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
